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Long long ago, in a galaxy far far away...
...Emperor: "Darth Sony, why is the Playstation mocked by the consoles of the Rebellion? Are we not significant in number?"
Darth Sony:"Yes Emperor, however they feel that we have many games, but of poor quality. I also see a disturbance in the force, the alliance must have a new power...."
Emperor:"The N64 is a weak old man and offers no threat to us."
Darth Sony:"There is something else...a son...the Gamecube"
Emperor:"Push forward production of the Playstation2, we'll flood the market with sequels, that'll show 'em"
...Emperor: "Darth Sony, why is the Playstation mocked by the consoles of the Rebellion? Are we not significant in number?"
Darth Sony:"Yes Emperor, however they feel that we have many games, but of poor quality. I also see a disturbance in the force, the alliance must have a new power...."
Emperor:"The N64 is a weak old man and offers no threat to us."
Darth Sony:"There is something else...a son...the Gamecube"
Emperor:"Push forward production of the Playstation2, we'll flood the market with sequels, that'll show 'em"
One lone survivor of the Dolphin Detonation crawled his way out of the ruinous remains of his once tranquil home, and gazed around at the remnants of his beloved Sonyport, his home for the last 20 years. Twisted piles of girders and shattered bricks were everywhere, which the lone survivor picked his way through, looking for survivors.
There were none.
He made a vow.."This I pledge, as a true follower of Sony. I shalt seek out and destroy all that is "other" than Sony. Chewie has got it coming, and he shalt get it."
He cast his square-pixellated eyes around the panorama of destruction one last time, before salvaging his space-hopper from it's underground storage, and bouncing off into the sunset with a determined look spread across his dusty jaw, he started his journey......
To be continued.
There were none.
He made a vow.."This I pledge, as a true follower of Sony. I shalt seek out and destroy all that is "other" than Sony. Chewie has got it coming, and he shalt get it."
He cast his square-pixellated eyes around the panorama of destruction one last time, before salvaging his space-hopper from it's underground storage, and bouncing off into the sunset with a determined look spread across his dusty jaw, he started his journey......
To be continued.
Dahh! We were so close Mutley!
Hee hee hee hee hee!
SHUT UP MUTLEY!
Hee hee hee hee hee!
SHUT UP MUTLEY!
I think the console wars are more akin to the Wacky Races. Who would be who though...
The Anthill Mob - Sega - they always try to do their best and have their heart in the right place, but sometimes they can't get their strategy right and everyone passes them by.
Penelope Pitstop - Nintendo - They look good but don't really have much substance, relying on others to bail them out on occasions.
Peter Perfect - Sony - Think that they are the best, but sometimes this view means they don't take the opposition into account.
Dasterdly and Mutley - Microsoft - speaks for itself!
The Anthill Mob - Sega - they always try to do their best and have their heart in the right place, but sometimes they can't get their strategy right and everyone passes them by.
Penelope Pitstop - Nintendo - They look good but don't really have much substance, relying on others to bail them out on occasions.
Peter Perfect - Sony - Think that they are the best, but sometimes this view means they don't take the opposition into account.
Dasterdly and Mutley - Microsoft - speaks for itself!
Just to let you know:
You can't "use up the force" and it's Sony who are too big for their boots!
Sony fans can't admit they are wrong when they are and they all hate quality gaming!
At least Nintendo make their own games!
Now the empire has fallen the rebels victorious, the Nintendo alliance clear up all sony's rubbish and sell it to the gillible sony fans who think it's another new development by Sony!
The survivors of the empire now call themselves the Sony clan! The go around playing lil consoles til there eyes go as square as the huge pixels that appear on the screen when playing their 32 bit console.
"Chewie..." said Han, "lets go to hyperdrive and blow the Sony scum out of this universe! Then lets go to tatooine to my favourite bar and catch up with a few mates."
Chewie muttured a groan and nodded. He pushed some buttons with his massive hands and quickly found the Sony Clan. They were no competition for the Millenium Dolphin and instead of destruction they were made to see Sony's horror in it's reality.
The sega forces who allied with Nintendo decide to go there own way to produce their own quality consoles and games agreeing that Nintendo will never be their enemies again! Only those few left of the Sony Clan!
You can't "use up the force" and it's Sony who are too big for their boots!
Sony fans can't admit they are wrong when they are and they all hate quality gaming!
At least Nintendo make their own games!
Now the empire has fallen the rebels victorious, the Nintendo alliance clear up all sony's rubbish and sell it to the gillible sony fans who think it's another new development by Sony!
The survivors of the empire now call themselves the Sony clan! The go around playing lil consoles til there eyes go as square as the huge pixels that appear on the screen when playing their 32 bit console.
"Chewie..." said Han, "lets go to hyperdrive and blow the Sony scum out of this universe! Then lets go to tatooine to my favourite bar and catch up with a few mates."
Chewie muttured a groan and nodded. He pushed some buttons with his massive hands and quickly found the Sony Clan. They were no competition for the Millenium Dolphin and instead of destruction they were made to see Sony's horror in it's reality.
The sega forces who allied with Nintendo decide to go there own way to produce their own quality consoles and games agreeing that Nintendo will never be their enemies again! Only those few left of the Sony Clan!
The X-Wing manoevred to a gentle landing in the forest of Dunforcing, the home of Yoda. Stepping out of the craft came the young apprentice, looking smart in his Special Reserve livery, with the emblem of the Special Reserve Alliance embalzoned across his chest.
He knocked on the door of the little hut which was tucked away in the corner of the clearing of the forest.
"In, come you," gurgled Yoda, retired tactitian of the Alliance.
"Greetings, Yoda," stammered the Reserve Cadet, "I seek your wisdom."
"Seek ye, find shall ye," rasped Yoda in his inimitable use of English.
"Well, Yoda, it's like this," the apprentice continued, "The Alliance is not sure what weapon will serve us best during the forthcoming war of the consoles, does the mighty Yoda have any advice that I can return to the Alliance with?"
"Sony full of it," gargles Yoda, crossing the hut to put the kettle on, "Nintendo too big for its boots it is getting, and Sega....." he raps his chest as he splutters the words out..."Sega all their force used up have they."
The kettle boils, the shrill whistle from the spout sending flocks of Sumoathacans into the air nearby who think the mating season has begun.
"My advice to the Alliance is...." says Yoda, pouring his cup of Naptolinch from the kettle, "Is to use the force, stocks of everything by with their mighty purchasing power should they."
The cadet beams at Yoda's mighty wisdom, and exits to take his X-Wing back to the planet of Merch-Endize, to set in motion plans that will shape the future of the Galaxy as we know it......
To be continued...........
He knocked on the door of the little hut which was tucked away in the corner of the clearing of the forest.
"In, come you," gurgled Yoda, retired tactitian of the Alliance.
"Greetings, Yoda," stammered the Reserve Cadet, "I seek your wisdom."
"Seek ye, find shall ye," rasped Yoda in his inimitable use of English.
"Well, Yoda, it's like this," the apprentice continued, "The Alliance is not sure what weapon will serve us best during the forthcoming war of the consoles, does the mighty Yoda have any advice that I can return to the Alliance with?"
"Sony full of it," gargles Yoda, crossing the hut to put the kettle on, "Nintendo too big for its boots it is getting, and Sega....." he raps his chest as he splutters the words out..."Sega all their force used up have they."
The kettle boils, the shrill whistle from the spout sending flocks of Sumoathacans into the air nearby who think the mating season has begun.
"My advice to the Alliance is...." says Yoda, pouring his cup of Naptolinch from the kettle, "Is to use the force, stocks of everything by with their mighty purchasing power should they."
The cadet beams at Yoda's mighty wisdom, and exits to take his X-Wing back to the planet of Merch-Endize, to set in motion plans that will shape the future of the Galaxy as we know it......
To be continued...........
Darth Sony 'I also fear a renewed attack from the powers of Sega.'
Emperor 'Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!'
Emperor 'Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!'
Long long ago, in a galaxy far far away...
...Emperor: "Darth Sony, why is the Playstation mocked by the consoles of the Rebellion? Are we not significant in number?"
Darth Sony:"Yes Emperor, however they feel that we have many games, but of poor quality. I also see a disturbance in the force, the alliance must have a new power...."
Emperor:"The N64 is a weak old man and offers no threat to us."
Darth Sony:"There is something else...a son...the Gamecube"
Emperor:"Push forward production of the Playstation2, we'll flood the market with sequels, that'll show 'em"
...Emperor: "Darth Sony, why is the Playstation mocked by the consoles of the Rebellion? Are we not significant in number?"
Darth Sony:"Yes Emperor, however they feel that we have many games, but of poor quality. I also see a disturbance in the force, the alliance must have a new power...."
Emperor:"The N64 is a weak old man and offers no threat to us."
Darth Sony:"There is something else...a son...the Gamecube"
Emperor:"Push forward production of the Playstation2, we'll flood the market with sequels, that'll show 'em"