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The GBASP is a fake. One silly mistake from the Japanese-English translator has resolved in utter chaos and havoc. Nintendo aren't making a mini-disc size GBA, with Backlight screen, rechargeable battery, etc, they're making one that looks like a snake! Yes, you heard, a snake! The Japanese-English translator, Mr. Yukakogi Smith, made an absolutely astonishing translation error. It isn't the GBASP! Special project? Pah! It's the GB ASP!
The Asp, an Adder lookalike, originates from the South of Europe. It is a member of the Viper family, Latin name Viperus Aspus. Apparently, the GB ASP, or Game Boy Asp, will feature special sensors under the screen to detect heat, for er, no apparent reason. The GB ASP will run off of heat, as the Asp itself is more active when warmer. Other features included are:
Venomous fangs- for when the fanboys get out of hand. Don't sit there and let them rip the fun out of your most precious console, one bite with the easily accessible fangs will knock them out instantly.
Egg laying abilities. What's better than one GB ASP? More! Yes, linking two GB ASP's together will result in the female version laying eggs. This special version of the GB ASP is only available in Japan at the moment, but it's rumoured that special breeding colonies will be set up, allowing people from around the world to enjoy nurturing the baby GB ASP.
No need for carry cases, the GB ASP builds its own home! Place it in the garden, and off it goes! Boring soil is instantly turned into the GB ASP's trendy home. Instead of lugging a small case around with you whilst going on holiday, your nifty GB ASP has to pass through quarantine! From here on, it's in the hands of the Airport staff, as they load your GB ASP into the luggage hold. Don't worry though, your GB ASP will be looked after, and you will be able to reunite with your most prized possession once at your destination.
Feed the GB ASP! Sega have very generously allowed the reproduction of Chu Chu's from Chu Chu rocket! Grab the helpless Chu's between your fingers, as you ram it into the 'mouth'. From here, it gets digested, processed and then when it emerges from the, er, other end, you're presented with either a Chu Chu Rocket key chain, bottle opener or lighter! Let's hope Sega plays a big role in the future of the GB ASP!
Watch the GB ASP change colour! Yes, like a real Asp, the GB ASP sheds its skin every so often. The boring real Asp stays the same colour, while the GB ASP changes with every shedding! Never will you get bored of the same colour again!
Shigeru Miyamoto, with the help of Yukakogi Smith, had this to say:
"GB ASP takatu get toshi mishi BOO! GB ASP play lovely sing game-san."
Well, we can lay money that Mr. Smith will be losing his job soon. After a quick translation through the Internet, we were able to come up with this:
"The GB ASP is exciting. Never before have Nintendo been so interested in reptiles! Reptiles are simply fascinating, and I have put my heart, soul and my monthly Yen allowance into making the GB Asp perfect."
Thank-you Shigeru. Another big question of the GB ASP is where the screen will appear. Here at Chips researching center, our team of Art university graduates were able to come up with the artist's impression, found at: http://www.boomspeed.com/ (space) microchips/GBASP01.gif As you can see from the amazing artwork, our artist's must have spent lots of time creating this, so props to them! What the tongue is for, we don't know, but a "taste the air" function is rumoured.
The amazing thing is, though; the GB ASP is like no other console. Never before has a console been able to fend for itself, to make it's own decisions, to bear offspring and to physically harm people (The Xbox being the exception :D).
Globally, the GB ASP is set to be a record breaker. Thousands of preorders have already arrived. Pet shops are earning hefty profits. Bob, from Bob's Pet store, had this to say:
"You by a kid a dog, he's happy. You buy another kid a cat, he's also happy. Then you get thousands of preorders for Snake incubators. You do wonder sometimes, people choosing a snake incubator and a GB ASP over a lovely little dog, but hey, business has tripled, I'm certainly not complaining!"
The GB ASP has totally rocked the gaming world. People are amazed at the ingenuity of the GB ASP. One Sony fanboy had this to say:
"PS2 roolz, but GB ASP rocks! Gamecube is rubbish, it's aimed at kids, but the GB ASP is cool! It has fangs man, FANGS"
Now it's time for my opinion. As a reporter, over the years I have experienced many amazing things. From the Gulf war to Afghan tribal Rugs, never have I had the chance to report on something more astonishing than this. I am honoured to have the privilege to write this story. The barrier between biology and technology has finally been broken. After many years of "They both end in ogy!" the final breakthrough was made. Nature and technology working in unison, and it's all thanks to the big N…
Thanks for reading
Chip-san :D
The Asp, an Adder lookalike, originates from the South of Europe. It is a member of the Viper family, Latin name Viperus Aspus. Apparently, the GB ASP, or Game Boy Asp, will feature special sensors under the screen to detect heat, for er, no apparent reason. The GB ASP will run off of heat, as the Asp itself is more active when warmer. Other features included are:
Venomous fangs- for when the fanboys get out of hand. Don't sit there and let them rip the fun out of your most precious console, one bite with the easily accessible fangs will knock them out instantly.
Egg laying abilities. What's better than one GB ASP? More! Yes, linking two GB ASP's together will result in the female version laying eggs. This special version of the GB ASP is only available in Japan at the moment, but it's rumoured that special breeding colonies will be set up, allowing people from around the world to enjoy nurturing the baby GB ASP.
No need for carry cases, the GB ASP builds its own home! Place it in the garden, and off it goes! Boring soil is instantly turned into the GB ASP's trendy home. Instead of lugging a small case around with you whilst going on holiday, your nifty GB ASP has to pass through quarantine! From here on, it's in the hands of the Airport staff, as they load your GB ASP into the luggage hold. Don't worry though, your GB ASP will be looked after, and you will be able to reunite with your most prized possession once at your destination.
Feed the GB ASP! Sega have very generously allowed the reproduction of Chu Chu's from Chu Chu rocket! Grab the helpless Chu's between your fingers, as you ram it into the 'mouth'. From here, it gets digested, processed and then when it emerges from the, er, other end, you're presented with either a Chu Chu Rocket key chain, bottle opener or lighter! Let's hope Sega plays a big role in the future of the GB ASP!
Watch the GB ASP change colour! Yes, like a real Asp, the GB ASP sheds its skin every so often. The boring real Asp stays the same colour, while the GB ASP changes with every shedding! Never will you get bored of the same colour again!
Shigeru Miyamoto, with the help of Yukakogi Smith, had this to say:
"GB ASP takatu get toshi mishi BOO! GB ASP play lovely sing game-san."
Well, we can lay money that Mr. Smith will be losing his job soon. After a quick translation through the Internet, we were able to come up with this:
"The GB ASP is exciting. Never before have Nintendo been so interested in reptiles! Reptiles are simply fascinating, and I have put my heart, soul and my monthly Yen allowance into making the GB Asp perfect."
Thank-you Shigeru. Another big question of the GB ASP is where the screen will appear. Here at Chips researching center, our team of Art university graduates were able to come up with the artist's impression, found at: http://www.boomspeed.com/ (space) microchips/GBASP01.gif As you can see from the amazing artwork, our artist's must have spent lots of time creating this, so props to them! What the tongue is for, we don't know, but a "taste the air" function is rumoured.
The amazing thing is, though; the GB ASP is like no other console. Never before has a console been able to fend for itself, to make it's own decisions, to bear offspring and to physically harm people (The Xbox being the exception :D).
Globally, the GB ASP is set to be a record breaker. Thousands of preorders have already arrived. Pet shops are earning hefty profits. Bob, from Bob's Pet store, had this to say:
"You by a kid a dog, he's happy. You buy another kid a cat, he's also happy. Then you get thousands of preorders for Snake incubators. You do wonder sometimes, people choosing a snake incubator and a GB ASP over a lovely little dog, but hey, business has tripled, I'm certainly not complaining!"
The GB ASP has totally rocked the gaming world. People are amazed at the ingenuity of the GB ASP. One Sony fanboy had this to say:
"PS2 roolz, but GB ASP rocks! Gamecube is rubbish, it's aimed at kids, but the GB ASP is cool! It has fangs man, FANGS"
Now it's time for my opinion. As a reporter, over the years I have experienced many amazing things. From the Gulf war to Afghan tribal Rugs, never have I had the chance to report on something more astonishing than this. I am honoured to have the privilege to write this story. The barrier between biology and technology has finally been broken. After many years of "They both end in ogy!" the final breakthrough was made. Nature and technology working in unison, and it's all thanks to the big N…
Thanks for reading
Chip-san :D
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Now don't be stingy on your part of the chipping in, MC. That way, you could get a nickname like 'Microchips' or something!
;D
;D
I think we should all chip in and give Twain a GC!
:D
:D
Tphi wrote:
> Twain wrote:
> I've drifted away, over to . . . *gasp* the darkside
>
> *screams* Nooo! Come back! Miyamoto is your father....
Ah! That explains the rumours . . . !
> Twain wrote:
> I've drifted away, over to . . . *gasp* the darkside
>
> *screams* Nooo! Come back! Miyamoto is your father....
Ah! That explains the rumours . . . !
Twain wrote:
> You were always good at writing things like that, Chippy!
It's his post, not his funeral..
Very nice, Microchips, very nice indeed. Oh, and the post was funny too :D.
> You were always good at writing things like that, Chippy!
It's his post, not his funeral..
Very nice, Microchips, very nice indeed. Oh, and the post was funny too :D.
Twain wrote:
> I've drifted away, over to . . . *gasp* the darkside
*screams* Nooo! Come back! Miyamoto is your father....
> I've drifted away, over to . . . *gasp* the darkside
*screams* Nooo! Come back! Miyamoto is your father....
You were always good at writing things like that, Chippy!
Too bad I got lost after a while, because I'm not so hot on the Nintendo side of things anymore. I've drifted away, over to . . . *gasp* the darkside . . . the PS2 side!
Too bad I got lost after a while, because I'm not so hot on the Nintendo side of things anymore. I've drifted away, over to . . . *gasp* the darkside . . . the PS2 side!
Whitestripes wrote:
> I thought this was better than the rhino one
>
>
> ..
>
>
> *gets burned at the stake*
Dicing with death WS...
:D
> I thought this was better than the rhino one
>
>
> ..
>
>
> *gets burned at the stake*
Dicing with death WS...
:D
I thought this was better than the rhino one
..
*gets burned at the stake*
..
*gets burned at the stake*
Monkey_With_Attitude wrote:
> It doesn't matter anyway. There have been three posts about GTA: Mice
> City.
Just the three? I thought they would dedicate a whole forum to it.
> It doesn't matter anyway. There have been three posts about GTA: Mice
> City.
Just the three? I thought they would dedicate a whole forum to it.
If I had known Meka had done one similar, then i went and did this, then yes it would have been foolish, but I really didn't see it.
Thanks though. :)
Thanks though. :)
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