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If my name was green...
If by some miracle of science I was to win the notable election and be transported into a world where my name was green and nothing is how it seems and I have a mild yet removable degree of power in a computer generated hierarchy what would I do?
Version 1
I would use my mild fame and respect to influence Special Reserve to give me a webcam and a crate of complimentary lager. One night I would consume 16 cans of Stella and dance in front of the webcam and get a rapturous applause from all who were watching. When I had sobered up and returned to the internet the following morning only to find request emails in my inbox for another ‘live show’. I would continue to put on live shows whilst gathering a considerable wealth and buy a country cottage. After realising I couldn’t afford the mortgage I would rent it out for themed ‘adult’ movies and even shoot my own private home videos there. After the food standards agency found out the ludicrous things I did with a cabbage and a bucket of mayonnaise they would imprison me, however I would be put in a cell with a crazed lunatic who recognised me from my internet shows. He would try to bum-rape me but I would scream like a 6-year-old girl for the guard who would escort me away and I would run away and burrow out of the prison like a rabbit and end up in Las Vegas. In Vegas I would gamble away my remaining wealth and end up busking outside Caesars Palace and playing a broken trombone for pennies.
Version 2
I would first faint at the idea of having any form of power, I would then bribe other notables to leave the forums and I would take over their account all with bizarre user names and make them all praise me. I would then hire an assassin, namely BEARDS, to off Tony and Snuggly for me, and then I would pay Larrykins and BEARDS to be my henchmen whilst I ran the forums as a dictator. Any forum members been out of line would get a stern hit-and-run telling off by BEARDS and Larrykins would be the seductress assassin who stole computer games from warehouses. More freebies would be given out and Special Reserve forums would become even more popular and I would replace the banners with adverts for casinos and rude and raunchy adult websites. This would make me richer than Bill Gates, however he would get very jealous and shoot himself in the foot making Microsoft inoperable. This would lead to the shutdown of most computers and the vanishing of the internet, except AOL who would charge a £35 dial up fee. I would replace Connie in the AOL adverts but having to wear a dress on TV would be too embarrassing and I would throw myself off a cliff to my own demise. The beach beneath the cliff, however, would be hosting the national women’s volleyball tournament and I would be nursed back to health by an abundance of heavy-chested females in bikinis. Sweet.
If you want to see me busking in Vegas, vote me. If you want me to be ‘loved’ by some sexy ladies, vote me. If you don’t give a damn, vote me. Unless you have someone better to vote for…which you almost certainly do…damn…
-kyz²²-
If by some miracle of science I was to win the notable election and be transported into a world where my name was green and nothing is how it seems and I have a mild yet removable degree of power in a computer generated hierarchy what would I do?
Version 1
I would use my mild fame and respect to influence Special Reserve to give me a webcam and a crate of complimentary lager. One night I would consume 16 cans of Stella and dance in front of the webcam and get a rapturous applause from all who were watching. When I had sobered up and returned to the internet the following morning only to find request emails in my inbox for another ‘live show’. I would continue to put on live shows whilst gathering a considerable wealth and buy a country cottage. After realising I couldn’t afford the mortgage I would rent it out for themed ‘adult’ movies and even shoot my own private home videos there. After the food standards agency found out the ludicrous things I did with a cabbage and a bucket of mayonnaise they would imprison me, however I would be put in a cell with a crazed lunatic who recognised me from my internet shows. He would try to bum-rape me but I would scream like a 6-year-old girl for the guard who would escort me away and I would run away and burrow out of the prison like a rabbit and end up in Las Vegas. In Vegas I would gamble away my remaining wealth and end up busking outside Caesars Palace and playing a broken trombone for pennies.
Version 2
I would first faint at the idea of having any form of power, I would then bribe other notables to leave the forums and I would take over their account all with bizarre user names and make them all praise me. I would then hire an assassin, namely BEARDS, to off Tony and Snuggly for me, and then I would pay Larrykins and BEARDS to be my henchmen whilst I ran the forums as a dictator. Any forum members been out of line would get a stern hit-and-run telling off by BEARDS and Larrykins would be the seductress assassin who stole computer games from warehouses. More freebies would be given out and Special Reserve forums would become even more popular and I would replace the banners with adverts for casinos and rude and raunchy adult websites. This would make me richer than Bill Gates, however he would get very jealous and shoot himself in the foot making Microsoft inoperable. This would lead to the shutdown of most computers and the vanishing of the internet, except AOL who would charge a £35 dial up fee. I would replace Connie in the AOL adverts but having to wear a dress on TV would be too embarrassing and I would throw myself off a cliff to my own demise. The beach beneath the cliff, however, would be hosting the national women’s volleyball tournament and I would be nursed back to health by an abundance of heavy-chested females in bikinis. Sweet.
If you want to see me busking in Vegas, vote me. If you want me to be ‘loved’ by some sexy ladies, vote me. If you don’t give a damn, vote me. Unless you have someone better to vote for…which you almost certainly do…damn…
-kyz²²-
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gerrid wrote:
> whitey.
> And you should only use puss in one context.
indeed :D
slik ~_~
> whitey.
> And you should only use puss in one context.
indeed :D
slik ~_~
whitey.
And you should only use puss in one context.
And you should only use puss in one context.
Sorry don't do Hotmail. Just browse this forum.
heh, what are you like, you people make me "upchuck" ;)
slik ~_~
slik ~_~
Oops. Posted that too fast.
I'm from Leeds. Got the word from the film mentioned and it just stuck.
I'm from Leeds. Got the word from the film mentioned and it just stuck.
What did I have an effect on then....?
Other than my upchuck reflex nothing...
from 10 Things I Hate About You. The day after she threw up at his feet.
Other than my upchuck reflex nothing...
from 10 Things I Hate About You. The day after she threw up at his feet.
Never heard upchuck before! Where are you from?
Barf /spew /vomit - take your pick.
upchuck?
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