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This is a Fan-Fic I started writing after completeing Soul Reaver 2. It is not based on the actual events of the game, rather it is a side story set after the end.
I would like to hear your thoughts on it as I have been caught in writers block for the past few months and have been unable to finish it. Any comments good or bad will be much appreciated.
I will follow Azul's advise and post it chapter by chapter, so I can get the comments and improve each chapter one at a time. I will try to post one a day so that if you are interested you can follow the story, but I can make no promises.
Today I will post the Prologue, but the story doesn't really start untill chapter one, when the style of writing also changes.
Thank you for taking the time to read it, I hope you enjoy it.
***
A Hope For The Past
Prologue: Fateful Meeting
There is a place. Its is a dark place but it is not an evil place. It is warm and tranquil. It is where every world that exists connects. It is where a door to one world is being opened and though it is stepping a young woman…
“Oh my! What happened? Where am I? Don’t say I’ve finally gone and done it! After all these years of wishing I’ve finally done it! I’ve found a way to the Gates of Realities! I knew it existed, I knew it! Oh God now I can visit all those worlds that I’ve heard about” she breathed. “ Finally I can leave my stupid past behind and start a new life anywhere, on any world I damn well please” she shouted aloud to no one in particular. She is rather small and nondescript. She has short brown hair to her shoulders and grey/blue eyes; nothing else about her is worth mentioning. In short she is nothing special and that is her problem. She had felt useless for years back on her own world. Nobody ever took any notice of her or needed her, but now all that would change. She could chose whichever world she wanted and go there to start a new life. A life she had only dreamed about.
“Now which world shall I visit first” she mused as she gazed around. The place was amazing, it was huge, and there were doors everywhere. All of them were leading to different worlds. Different planets. Different realities. Different lives. “Choices, choices, choices. I wonder how I can tell which world lays behind which door…um”. As she began to closely examine a sturdy looking door she saw a movement from the corner of her eye. One of the other doors was beginning to open. She turned around gingerly to watch it. This could mean trouble. After all she had no idea how she had managed to get to this place. Any kind of unholy monster could be coming from out of that door. Maybe that’s why she had been brought here. Maybe she was lunch. The door continued to slowly open. Her heart started to race as a small box like object began to appear though the door. She watched as the box was pushed gently into the room, then suddenly the door slammed shut, giving her quiet a start. Oh how she wished that there was something she could hide behind. She stood for a time unable to move. Nothing appeared to be happening so she said a quick prayer and plucked up the courage to go and have a look.
As she walked slowly towards the box she noticed that it had no lid. As she came closer she peered inside and was met by the gaze of a small baby. Not a monster, that was a relief. Just a little tiny baby. A strange baby for it had sky blue coloured skin and golden amber eyes, but it was still a baby therefore nothing to be afraid of. “Oh aren’t you a cutie pie, I have never met anyone with your skin colour before, its rather unusual isn’t it? What are you doing here? Why were you pushed though that portal door?, didn’t they want you back home? I don’t see why, you’re so sweet. How could anybody do that to you?” she cooed to him in a silly voice as she reached in to pick him up. As she lifted the baby the blanket in which it was wrapped came loose and fell open, revealing a stranger child then she had first believed. Not only did it have odd coloured skin and eyes; it also had tiny claw like extremities for both its hands and its feet. And upon its back were two small dark purple wings. “Well I can see you’re a little boy and that you’re not human, but what are you? You remind me of something, but you can’t be anything like that, can you?” In response the boy just stared deep into her eyes. Looking back into his beautiful eyes a strange sensation filled her very being. She knew from that point on that she would not leave this child, she would protect him with her life. This child had a grand purpose somewhere, and she would get him there or die trying. From now until the day he was safe their fates were intertwined. “Its okay, I’m here now” she whispered softly into his ear as she hugged him close.
Suddenly another door began to open, she backed away holding on to the boy as tightly as possible, no harm would come to him not while she was here, but the boy who had-until this point-been quiet, started to cry. The door stood open but nothing came through so she took a few steps nearer and his crying ceased. After a few more careful steps towards the door a sudden feeling swept over her. The door was beckoning her to step through into the world beyond. Unnerved she stepped back again and the boy began to whimper. “What’s the matter little guy? Do you want to go thought that door? Is that where you need to go?” In response the child fell silent and looked curiously at her. She knew that the boy belonged to whatever world lay beyond that door. “Okay then, here we go” she breathed as she plucked up the courage to approach the door. Then taking one last look at the door to her own world she cautiously stepped through into the uncertainty beyond.
I would like to hear your thoughts on it as I have been caught in writers block for the past few months and have been unable to finish it. Any comments good or bad will be much appreciated.
I will follow Azul's advise and post it chapter by chapter, so I can get the comments and improve each chapter one at a time. I will try to post one a day so that if you are interested you can follow the story, but I can make no promises.
Today I will post the Prologue, but the story doesn't really start untill chapter one, when the style of writing also changes.
Thank you for taking the time to read it, I hope you enjoy it.
***
A Hope For The Past
Prologue: Fateful Meeting
There is a place. Its is a dark place but it is not an evil place. It is warm and tranquil. It is where every world that exists connects. It is where a door to one world is being opened and though it is stepping a young woman…
“Oh my! What happened? Where am I? Don’t say I’ve finally gone and done it! After all these years of wishing I’ve finally done it! I’ve found a way to the Gates of Realities! I knew it existed, I knew it! Oh God now I can visit all those worlds that I’ve heard about” she breathed. “ Finally I can leave my stupid past behind and start a new life anywhere, on any world I damn well please” she shouted aloud to no one in particular. She is rather small and nondescript. She has short brown hair to her shoulders and grey/blue eyes; nothing else about her is worth mentioning. In short she is nothing special and that is her problem. She had felt useless for years back on her own world. Nobody ever took any notice of her or needed her, but now all that would change. She could chose whichever world she wanted and go there to start a new life. A life she had only dreamed about.
“Now which world shall I visit first” she mused as she gazed around. The place was amazing, it was huge, and there were doors everywhere. All of them were leading to different worlds. Different planets. Different realities. Different lives. “Choices, choices, choices. I wonder how I can tell which world lays behind which door…um”. As she began to closely examine a sturdy looking door she saw a movement from the corner of her eye. One of the other doors was beginning to open. She turned around gingerly to watch it. This could mean trouble. After all she had no idea how she had managed to get to this place. Any kind of unholy monster could be coming from out of that door. Maybe that’s why she had been brought here. Maybe she was lunch. The door continued to slowly open. Her heart started to race as a small box like object began to appear though the door. She watched as the box was pushed gently into the room, then suddenly the door slammed shut, giving her quiet a start. Oh how she wished that there was something she could hide behind. She stood for a time unable to move. Nothing appeared to be happening so she said a quick prayer and plucked up the courage to go and have a look.
As she walked slowly towards the box she noticed that it had no lid. As she came closer she peered inside and was met by the gaze of a small baby. Not a monster, that was a relief. Just a little tiny baby. A strange baby for it had sky blue coloured skin and golden amber eyes, but it was still a baby therefore nothing to be afraid of. “Oh aren’t you a cutie pie, I have never met anyone with your skin colour before, its rather unusual isn’t it? What are you doing here? Why were you pushed though that portal door?, didn’t they want you back home? I don’t see why, you’re so sweet. How could anybody do that to you?” she cooed to him in a silly voice as she reached in to pick him up. As she lifted the baby the blanket in which it was wrapped came loose and fell open, revealing a stranger child then she had first believed. Not only did it have odd coloured skin and eyes; it also had tiny claw like extremities for both its hands and its feet. And upon its back were two small dark purple wings. “Well I can see you’re a little boy and that you’re not human, but what are you? You remind me of something, but you can’t be anything like that, can you?” In response the boy just stared deep into her eyes. Looking back into his beautiful eyes a strange sensation filled her very being. She knew from that point on that she would not leave this child, she would protect him with her life. This child had a grand purpose somewhere, and she would get him there or die trying. From now until the day he was safe their fates were intertwined. “Its okay, I’m here now” she whispered softly into his ear as she hugged him close.
Suddenly another door began to open, she backed away holding on to the boy as tightly as possible, no harm would come to him not while she was here, but the boy who had-until this point-been quiet, started to cry. The door stood open but nothing came through so she took a few steps nearer and his crying ceased. After a few more careful steps towards the door a sudden feeling swept over her. The door was beckoning her to step through into the world beyond. Unnerved she stepped back again and the boy began to whimper. “What’s the matter little guy? Do you want to go thought that door? Is that where you need to go?” In response the child fell silent and looked curiously at her. She knew that the boy belonged to whatever world lay beyond that door. “Okay then, here we go” she breathed as she plucked up the courage to approach the door. Then taking one last look at the door to her own world she cautiously stepped through into the uncertainty beyond.
There's nothing really there that I can criticise, a good start.
The descriptions of everything are perfect.
Verr' good
The descriptions of everything are perfect.
Verr' good
Not a bad start. Keep 'em coming.
This is a Fan-Fic I started writing after completeing Soul Reaver 2. It is not based on the actual events of the game, rather it is a side story set after the end.
I would like to hear your thoughts on it as I have been caught in writers block for the past few months and have been unable to finish it. Any comments good or bad will be much appreciated.
I will follow Azul's advise and post it chapter by chapter, so I can get the comments and improve each chapter one at a time. I will try to post one a day so that if you are interested you can follow the story, but I can make no promises.
Today I will post the Prologue, but the story doesn't really start untill chapter one, when the style of writing also changes.
Thank you for taking the time to read it, I hope you enjoy it.
***
A Hope For The Past
Prologue: Fateful Meeting
There is a place. Its is a dark place but it is not an evil place. It is warm and tranquil. It is where every world that exists connects. It is where a door to one world is being opened and though it is stepping a young woman…
“Oh my! What happened? Where am I? Don’t say I’ve finally gone and done it! After all these years of wishing I’ve finally done it! I’ve found a way to the Gates of Realities! I knew it existed, I knew it! Oh God now I can visit all those worlds that I’ve heard about” she breathed. “ Finally I can leave my stupid past behind and start a new life anywhere, on any world I damn well please” she shouted aloud to no one in particular. She is rather small and nondescript. She has short brown hair to her shoulders and grey/blue eyes; nothing else about her is worth mentioning. In short she is nothing special and that is her problem. She had felt useless for years back on her own world. Nobody ever took any notice of her or needed her, but now all that would change. She could chose whichever world she wanted and go there to start a new life. A life she had only dreamed about.
“Now which world shall I visit first” she mused as she gazed around. The place was amazing, it was huge, and there were doors everywhere. All of them were leading to different worlds. Different planets. Different realities. Different lives. “Choices, choices, choices. I wonder how I can tell which world lays behind which door…um”. As she began to closely examine a sturdy looking door she saw a movement from the corner of her eye. One of the other doors was beginning to open. She turned around gingerly to watch it. This could mean trouble. After all she had no idea how she had managed to get to this place. Any kind of unholy monster could be coming from out of that door. Maybe that’s why she had been brought here. Maybe she was lunch. The door continued to slowly open. Her heart started to race as a small box like object began to appear though the door. She watched as the box was pushed gently into the room, then suddenly the door slammed shut, giving her quiet a start. Oh how she wished that there was something she could hide behind. She stood for a time unable to move. Nothing appeared to be happening so she said a quick prayer and plucked up the courage to go and have a look.
As she walked slowly towards the box she noticed that it had no lid. As she came closer she peered inside and was met by the gaze of a small baby. Not a monster, that was a relief. Just a little tiny baby. A strange baby for it had sky blue coloured skin and golden amber eyes, but it was still a baby therefore nothing to be afraid of. “Oh aren’t you a cutie pie, I have never met anyone with your skin colour before, its rather unusual isn’t it? What are you doing here? Why were you pushed though that portal door?, didn’t they want you back home? I don’t see why, you’re so sweet. How could anybody do that to you?” she cooed to him in a silly voice as she reached in to pick him up. As she lifted the baby the blanket in which it was wrapped came loose and fell open, revealing a stranger child then she had first believed. Not only did it have odd coloured skin and eyes; it also had tiny claw like extremities for both its hands and its feet. And upon its back were two small dark purple wings. “Well I can see you’re a little boy and that you’re not human, but what are you? You remind me of something, but you can’t be anything like that, can you?” In response the boy just stared deep into her eyes. Looking back into his beautiful eyes a strange sensation filled her very being. She knew from that point on that she would not leave this child, she would protect him with her life. This child had a grand purpose somewhere, and she would get him there or die trying. From now until the day he was safe their fates were intertwined. “Its okay, I’m here now” she whispered softly into his ear as she hugged him close.
Suddenly another door began to open, she backed away holding on to the boy as tightly as possible, no harm would come to him not while she was here, but the boy who had-until this point-been quiet, started to cry. The door stood open but nothing came through so she took a few steps nearer and his crying ceased. After a few more careful steps towards the door a sudden feeling swept over her. The door was beckoning her to step through into the world beyond. Unnerved she stepped back again and the boy began to whimper. “What’s the matter little guy? Do you want to go thought that door? Is that where you need to go?” In response the child fell silent and looked curiously at her. She knew that the boy belonged to whatever world lay beyond that door. “Okay then, here we go” she breathed as she plucked up the courage to approach the door. Then taking one last look at the door to her own world she cautiously stepped through into the uncertainty beyond.
I would like to hear your thoughts on it as I have been caught in writers block for the past few months and have been unable to finish it. Any comments good or bad will be much appreciated.
I will follow Azul's advise and post it chapter by chapter, so I can get the comments and improve each chapter one at a time. I will try to post one a day so that if you are interested you can follow the story, but I can make no promises.
Today I will post the Prologue, but the story doesn't really start untill chapter one, when the style of writing also changes.
Thank you for taking the time to read it, I hope you enjoy it.
***
A Hope For The Past
Prologue: Fateful Meeting
There is a place. Its is a dark place but it is not an evil place. It is warm and tranquil. It is where every world that exists connects. It is where a door to one world is being opened and though it is stepping a young woman…
“Oh my! What happened? Where am I? Don’t say I’ve finally gone and done it! After all these years of wishing I’ve finally done it! I’ve found a way to the Gates of Realities! I knew it existed, I knew it! Oh God now I can visit all those worlds that I’ve heard about” she breathed. “ Finally I can leave my stupid past behind and start a new life anywhere, on any world I damn well please” she shouted aloud to no one in particular. She is rather small and nondescript. She has short brown hair to her shoulders and grey/blue eyes; nothing else about her is worth mentioning. In short she is nothing special and that is her problem. She had felt useless for years back on her own world. Nobody ever took any notice of her or needed her, but now all that would change. She could chose whichever world she wanted and go there to start a new life. A life she had only dreamed about.
“Now which world shall I visit first” she mused as she gazed around. The place was amazing, it was huge, and there were doors everywhere. All of them were leading to different worlds. Different planets. Different realities. Different lives. “Choices, choices, choices. I wonder how I can tell which world lays behind which door…um”. As she began to closely examine a sturdy looking door she saw a movement from the corner of her eye. One of the other doors was beginning to open. She turned around gingerly to watch it. This could mean trouble. After all she had no idea how she had managed to get to this place. Any kind of unholy monster could be coming from out of that door. Maybe that’s why she had been brought here. Maybe she was lunch. The door continued to slowly open. Her heart started to race as a small box like object began to appear though the door. She watched as the box was pushed gently into the room, then suddenly the door slammed shut, giving her quiet a start. Oh how she wished that there was something she could hide behind. She stood for a time unable to move. Nothing appeared to be happening so she said a quick prayer and plucked up the courage to go and have a look.
As she walked slowly towards the box she noticed that it had no lid. As she came closer she peered inside and was met by the gaze of a small baby. Not a monster, that was a relief. Just a little tiny baby. A strange baby for it had sky blue coloured skin and golden amber eyes, but it was still a baby therefore nothing to be afraid of. “Oh aren’t you a cutie pie, I have never met anyone with your skin colour before, its rather unusual isn’t it? What are you doing here? Why were you pushed though that portal door?, didn’t they want you back home? I don’t see why, you’re so sweet. How could anybody do that to you?” she cooed to him in a silly voice as she reached in to pick him up. As she lifted the baby the blanket in which it was wrapped came loose and fell open, revealing a stranger child then she had first believed. Not only did it have odd coloured skin and eyes; it also had tiny claw like extremities for both its hands and its feet. And upon its back were two small dark purple wings. “Well I can see you’re a little boy and that you’re not human, but what are you? You remind me of something, but you can’t be anything like that, can you?” In response the boy just stared deep into her eyes. Looking back into his beautiful eyes a strange sensation filled her very being. She knew from that point on that she would not leave this child, she would protect him with her life. This child had a grand purpose somewhere, and she would get him there or die trying. From now until the day he was safe their fates were intertwined. “Its okay, I’m here now” she whispered softly into his ear as she hugged him close.
Suddenly another door began to open, she backed away holding on to the boy as tightly as possible, no harm would come to him not while she was here, but the boy who had-until this point-been quiet, started to cry. The door stood open but nothing came through so she took a few steps nearer and his crying ceased. After a few more careful steps towards the door a sudden feeling swept over her. The door was beckoning her to step through into the world beyond. Unnerved she stepped back again and the boy began to whimper. “What’s the matter little guy? Do you want to go thought that door? Is that where you need to go?” In response the child fell silent and looked curiously at her. She knew that the boy belonged to whatever world lay beyond that door. “Okay then, here we go” she breathed as she plucked up the courage to approach the door. Then taking one last look at the door to her own world she cautiously stepped through into the uncertainty beyond.