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Generally, we don’t really get a hint as to how high, or low, a characters intelligence is. But seeing as most of the time they can rescue people, jump about like a loon and generally do stuff, we don’t think of them as being either dumb or super intelligent.
While visiting dumbcrooks.com I started thinking about what would happen if certain games characters WERE *ahem*… mentally challenged. So, here is my interpretation if that situation occurred with Mario.
I’ll be doing one of these short stories weekly till I can’t be bothered any more :-) So, without further ado, I present to you:
STUPID MARIO: THE PRINCESS’ TALE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been an average day for Mario, he’d helped his smarter brother, Luigi, do a bit of plumbing (his main job was to try and not get in the way) and when he was done, they’d gone back to the flat they lived in. Suddenly, there was a screaming from outside, and they both rushed to the window. Bowser was kidnapping Peach! (Yet again)
"Help!!!!!! HELP ME MARIO!" screamed Peach from the street below.
"Hey Peach!" Shouted back Mario while waving, "Who’s your new guy? Looks kinda familiar!"
"He’s kidnapping me!!!! HELP!" Yelled the now hysterical Peach.
" Oooo, bitta role-play? You kinky minx you."
Peach gave up and let herself be carried off. By the time Mario had turned around to say, " Ooer, better not interrupt them, ay" Luigi was down in the street chasing after Bowser.
"Hmmm, wonder where he’s going" thought Mario. "Probably just another plumbing job, I think I’ll stay here... Ooooo! A films on! Super Mario Brothers. What a coincidence, I think I’ll watch it."
So he did, while Luigi was out performing heroic deeds and rescuing Peach back, Mario just sat there staring dumbly at the screen.
Luigi arrived back at the flat; he opened the door to see Mario lying on the sofa chanting "Come on! You can do it Mario! Yeah! Beat that evil dinosaur!" at the TV. Luigi sighed. "Mario, me and Peach are goin’ to the movies, wanna come?
"Yeah sure, I’ll get me coat" replied Mario, leaping off the sofa. He grabbed his coat and hopped into the van.
They were halfway there when Mario stopped writing crude words in the condensation of the van’s windows and asked "Hey, where are we going again"
A double sigh came from the front, then the double answer "THE MOVIES!"
"Oh, OK... Erm, one question. What’s a movie?"
"God..." Luigi was used to Mario’s thickness, but this took the biscuit. "You know, a film? Like the thing you were watching earlier?"
"OHHHH!" Said Mario, now he remembered.
They pulled up outside the cinema and all got out. Luigi went and bought the ticket with Peach.
"Hey, where’s Mario?" Asked Luigi as he came away from the desk with two 3 tickets to "Spliff Wars: The Phantom Dealer" in his hands.
"There he is" said Peach, motioning towards the cinema’s sweet shop. Mario was standing in their gazing at the rows of candy like a hypnotised child.
"Bah, OI! MARIO! Get over here!"
"Huh? Oh"
They went into the film and took their seats, Mario on the left, Peach in the middle and Luigi on the right. The film started.
After about 80 minutes, Mario noticed Peach looking at him. No, not looking, staring.
"Are you OK" he asked?
"Yes, it’s just… Despite your obvious stupidity, there’s something about you... something that draws me to you…" She put her hand on the inside of his thigh.
Mario lowered his head and looked at her hand. He looked at her hand for a long time. He then raised his head again and asked "Are...you… cold or something? ‘Cause if you are, I have a pair of gloves" He started rustling around trying to find the gloves. A barrage of popcorn and spit came flying at him accompanied by whispers of "Sssssshhhh!!!!!"
He stood up. "Oh, SORRY, SORRY EVERYONE, SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO, SORRY" this was met by more popcorn and spit.
"For God sake Mario, sit down!" said Peach.
"OK" came the answer as he plopped back down in his seat again.
Peach sat back in her chair and pouted. Would Mario ever be hers? Would he ever get the message? Does he even know what the message is? Would she have to teach him about boys and girls, the birds and the bees, the facts of life!?
She glanced back at him; he was captivated by the film. Staring, mouth open, "Woooooooooooooow" he gasped " They have TWO suns on Pottooine… Wow"
"This is gonna be a loooooong haul" thought Peach to herself as she settled back again.
THE END.
Cheers for reading, RBS :-D
While visiting dumbcrooks.com I started thinking about what would happen if certain games characters WERE *ahem*… mentally challenged. So, here is my interpretation if that situation occurred with Mario.
I’ll be doing one of these short stories weekly till I can’t be bothered any more :-) So, without further ado, I present to you:
STUPID MARIO: THE PRINCESS’ TALE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been an average day for Mario, he’d helped his smarter brother, Luigi, do a bit of plumbing (his main job was to try and not get in the way) and when he was done, they’d gone back to the flat they lived in. Suddenly, there was a screaming from outside, and they both rushed to the window. Bowser was kidnapping Peach! (Yet again)
"Help!!!!!! HELP ME MARIO!" screamed Peach from the street below.
"Hey Peach!" Shouted back Mario while waving, "Who’s your new guy? Looks kinda familiar!"
"He’s kidnapping me!!!! HELP!" Yelled the now hysterical Peach.
" Oooo, bitta role-play? You kinky minx you."
Peach gave up and let herself be carried off. By the time Mario had turned around to say, " Ooer, better not interrupt them, ay" Luigi was down in the street chasing after Bowser.
"Hmmm, wonder where he’s going" thought Mario. "Probably just another plumbing job, I think I’ll stay here... Ooooo! A films on! Super Mario Brothers. What a coincidence, I think I’ll watch it."
So he did, while Luigi was out performing heroic deeds and rescuing Peach back, Mario just sat there staring dumbly at the screen.
Luigi arrived back at the flat; he opened the door to see Mario lying on the sofa chanting "Come on! You can do it Mario! Yeah! Beat that evil dinosaur!" at the TV. Luigi sighed. "Mario, me and Peach are goin’ to the movies, wanna come?
"Yeah sure, I’ll get me coat" replied Mario, leaping off the sofa. He grabbed his coat and hopped into the van.
They were halfway there when Mario stopped writing crude words in the condensation of the van’s windows and asked "Hey, where are we going again"
A double sigh came from the front, then the double answer "THE MOVIES!"
"Oh, OK... Erm, one question. What’s a movie?"
"God..." Luigi was used to Mario’s thickness, but this took the biscuit. "You know, a film? Like the thing you were watching earlier?"
"OHHHH!" Said Mario, now he remembered.
They pulled up outside the cinema and all got out. Luigi went and bought the ticket with Peach.
"Hey, where’s Mario?" Asked Luigi as he came away from the desk with two 3 tickets to "Spliff Wars: The Phantom Dealer" in his hands.
"There he is" said Peach, motioning towards the cinema’s sweet shop. Mario was standing in their gazing at the rows of candy like a hypnotised child.
"Bah, OI! MARIO! Get over here!"
"Huh? Oh"
They went into the film and took their seats, Mario on the left, Peach in the middle and Luigi on the right. The film started.
After about 80 minutes, Mario noticed Peach looking at him. No, not looking, staring.
"Are you OK" he asked?
"Yes, it’s just… Despite your obvious stupidity, there’s something about you... something that draws me to you…" She put her hand on the inside of his thigh.
Mario lowered his head and looked at her hand. He looked at her hand for a long time. He then raised his head again and asked "Are...you… cold or something? ‘Cause if you are, I have a pair of gloves" He started rustling around trying to find the gloves. A barrage of popcorn and spit came flying at him accompanied by whispers of "Sssssshhhh!!!!!"
He stood up. "Oh, SORRY, SORRY EVERYONE, SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO, SORRY" this was met by more popcorn and spit.
"For God sake Mario, sit down!" said Peach.
"OK" came the answer as he plopped back down in his seat again.
Peach sat back in her chair and pouted. Would Mario ever be hers? Would he ever get the message? Does he even know what the message is? Would she have to teach him about boys and girls, the birds and the bees, the facts of life!?
She glanced back at him; he was captivated by the film. Staring, mouth open, "Woooooooooooooow" he gasped " They have TWO suns on Pottooine… Wow"
"This is gonna be a loooooong haul" thought Peach to herself as she settled back again.
THE END.
Cheers for reading, RBS :-D
Cheers everyone :-)
Heh, i dont read many stories...becasue most of them are crap :D
But hey, this one was quality. Thank you for bringing a smile to my face :D
But hey, this one was quality. Thank you for bringing a smile to my face :D
good story.
Grandprix wrote:
> That was great. A sign of a good story is being able to visualise it and I saw
> ever bit of it.
Cheers :-)
Stupid Mario! Will he ever get a mental age of 3 instead of 2?
I very much doubt it, ask the princess :-D
> That was great. A sign of a good story is being able to visualise it and I saw
> ever bit of it.
Cheers :-)
Stupid Mario! Will he ever get a mental age of 3 instead of 2?
I very much doubt it, ask the princess :-D
That was great. A sign of a good story is being able to visualise it and I saw ever bit of it. Stupid Mario! Will he ever get a mental age of 3 instead of 2?
Generally, we don’t really get a hint as to how high, or low, a characters intelligence is. But seeing as most of the time they can rescue people, jump about like a loon and generally do stuff, we don’t think of them as being either dumb or super intelligent.
While visiting dumbcrooks.com I started thinking about what would happen if certain games characters WERE *ahem*… mentally challenged. So, here is my interpretation if that situation occurred with Mario.
I’ll be doing one of these short stories weekly till I can’t be bothered any more :-) So, without further ado, I present to you:
STUPID MARIO: THE PRINCESS’ TALE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been an average day for Mario, he’d helped his smarter brother, Luigi, do a bit of plumbing (his main job was to try and not get in the way) and when he was done, they’d gone back to the flat they lived in. Suddenly, there was a screaming from outside, and they both rushed to the window. Bowser was kidnapping Peach! (Yet again)
"Help!!!!!! HELP ME MARIO!" screamed Peach from the street below.
"Hey Peach!" Shouted back Mario while waving, "Who’s your new guy? Looks kinda familiar!"
"He’s kidnapping me!!!! HELP!" Yelled the now hysterical Peach.
" Oooo, bitta role-play? You kinky minx you."
Peach gave up and let herself be carried off. By the time Mario had turned around to say, " Ooer, better not interrupt them, ay" Luigi was down in the street chasing after Bowser.
"Hmmm, wonder where he’s going" thought Mario. "Probably just another plumbing job, I think I’ll stay here... Ooooo! A films on! Super Mario Brothers. What a coincidence, I think I’ll watch it."
So he did, while Luigi was out performing heroic deeds and rescuing Peach back, Mario just sat there staring dumbly at the screen.
Luigi arrived back at the flat; he opened the door to see Mario lying on the sofa chanting "Come on! You can do it Mario! Yeah! Beat that evil dinosaur!" at the TV. Luigi sighed. "Mario, me and Peach are goin’ to the movies, wanna come?
"Yeah sure, I’ll get me coat" replied Mario, leaping off the sofa. He grabbed his coat and hopped into the van.
They were halfway there when Mario stopped writing crude words in the condensation of the van’s windows and asked "Hey, where are we going again"
A double sigh came from the front, then the double answer "THE MOVIES!"
"Oh, OK... Erm, one question. What’s a movie?"
"God..." Luigi was used to Mario’s thickness, but this took the biscuit. "You know, a film? Like the thing you were watching earlier?"
"OHHHH!" Said Mario, now he remembered.
They pulled up outside the cinema and all got out. Luigi went and bought the ticket with Peach.
"Hey, where’s Mario?" Asked Luigi as he came away from the desk with two 3 tickets to "Spliff Wars: The Phantom Dealer" in his hands.
"There he is" said Peach, motioning towards the cinema’s sweet shop. Mario was standing in their gazing at the rows of candy like a hypnotised child.
"Bah, OI! MARIO! Get over here!"
"Huh? Oh"
They went into the film and took their seats, Mario on the left, Peach in the middle and Luigi on the right. The film started.
After about 80 minutes, Mario noticed Peach looking at him. No, not looking, staring.
"Are you OK" he asked?
"Yes, it’s just… Despite your obvious stupidity, there’s something about you... something that draws me to you…" She put her hand on the inside of his thigh.
Mario lowered his head and looked at her hand. He looked at her hand for a long time. He then raised his head again and asked "Are...you… cold or something? ‘Cause if you are, I have a pair of gloves" He started rustling around trying to find the gloves. A barrage of popcorn and spit came flying at him accompanied by whispers of "Sssssshhhh!!!!!"
He stood up. "Oh, SORRY, SORRY EVERYONE, SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO, SORRY" this was met by more popcorn and spit.
"For God sake Mario, sit down!" said Peach.
"OK" came the answer as he plopped back down in his seat again.
Peach sat back in her chair and pouted. Would Mario ever be hers? Would he ever get the message? Does he even know what the message is? Would she have to teach him about boys and girls, the birds and the bees, the facts of life!?
She glanced back at him; he was captivated by the film. Staring, mouth open, "Woooooooooooooow" he gasped " They have TWO suns on Pottooine… Wow"
"This is gonna be a loooooong haul" thought Peach to herself as she settled back again.
THE END.
Cheers for reading, RBS :-D
While visiting dumbcrooks.com I started thinking about what would happen if certain games characters WERE *ahem*… mentally challenged. So, here is my interpretation if that situation occurred with Mario.
I’ll be doing one of these short stories weekly till I can’t be bothered any more :-) So, without further ado, I present to you:
STUPID MARIO: THE PRINCESS’ TALE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been an average day for Mario, he’d helped his smarter brother, Luigi, do a bit of plumbing (his main job was to try and not get in the way) and when he was done, they’d gone back to the flat they lived in. Suddenly, there was a screaming from outside, and they both rushed to the window. Bowser was kidnapping Peach! (Yet again)
"Help!!!!!! HELP ME MARIO!" screamed Peach from the street below.
"Hey Peach!" Shouted back Mario while waving, "Who’s your new guy? Looks kinda familiar!"
"He’s kidnapping me!!!! HELP!" Yelled the now hysterical Peach.
" Oooo, bitta role-play? You kinky minx you."
Peach gave up and let herself be carried off. By the time Mario had turned around to say, " Ooer, better not interrupt them, ay" Luigi was down in the street chasing after Bowser.
"Hmmm, wonder where he’s going" thought Mario. "Probably just another plumbing job, I think I’ll stay here... Ooooo! A films on! Super Mario Brothers. What a coincidence, I think I’ll watch it."
So he did, while Luigi was out performing heroic deeds and rescuing Peach back, Mario just sat there staring dumbly at the screen.
Luigi arrived back at the flat; he opened the door to see Mario lying on the sofa chanting "Come on! You can do it Mario! Yeah! Beat that evil dinosaur!" at the TV. Luigi sighed. "Mario, me and Peach are goin’ to the movies, wanna come?
"Yeah sure, I’ll get me coat" replied Mario, leaping off the sofa. He grabbed his coat and hopped into the van.
They were halfway there when Mario stopped writing crude words in the condensation of the van’s windows and asked "Hey, where are we going again"
A double sigh came from the front, then the double answer "THE MOVIES!"
"Oh, OK... Erm, one question. What’s a movie?"
"God..." Luigi was used to Mario’s thickness, but this took the biscuit. "You know, a film? Like the thing you were watching earlier?"
"OHHHH!" Said Mario, now he remembered.
They pulled up outside the cinema and all got out. Luigi went and bought the ticket with Peach.
"Hey, where’s Mario?" Asked Luigi as he came away from the desk with two 3 tickets to "Spliff Wars: The Phantom Dealer" in his hands.
"There he is" said Peach, motioning towards the cinema’s sweet shop. Mario was standing in their gazing at the rows of candy like a hypnotised child.
"Bah, OI! MARIO! Get over here!"
"Huh? Oh"
They went into the film and took their seats, Mario on the left, Peach in the middle and Luigi on the right. The film started.
After about 80 minutes, Mario noticed Peach looking at him. No, not looking, staring.
"Are you OK" he asked?
"Yes, it’s just… Despite your obvious stupidity, there’s something about you... something that draws me to you…" She put her hand on the inside of his thigh.
Mario lowered his head and looked at her hand. He looked at her hand for a long time. He then raised his head again and asked "Are...you… cold or something? ‘Cause if you are, I have a pair of gloves" He started rustling around trying to find the gloves. A barrage of popcorn and spit came flying at him accompanied by whispers of "Sssssshhhh!!!!!"
He stood up. "Oh, SORRY, SORRY EVERYONE, SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO, SORRY" this was met by more popcorn and spit.
"For God sake Mario, sit down!" said Peach.
"OK" came the answer as he plopped back down in his seat again.
Peach sat back in her chair and pouted. Would Mario ever be hers? Would he ever get the message? Does he even know what the message is? Would she have to teach him about boys and girls, the birds and the bees, the facts of life!?
She glanced back at him; he was captivated by the film. Staring, mouth open, "Woooooooooooooow" he gasped " They have TWO suns on Pottooine… Wow"
"This is gonna be a loooooong haul" thought Peach to herself as she settled back again.
THE END.
Cheers for reading, RBS :-D