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"Mum, I think I'm pregnant"

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Sat 05/01/02 at 18:23
Regular
Posts: 787
The Announcement:

....you whaT!?

You heard me....I think I'm pregnant. And so the story begins. A console starts its life as a rumour. It always happens, and its an exciting/scary (for some :P) moment.

The Months leading up to:

A console is announced waaay before its released. A bit like a baby. We know about it in advance and it gives us time to go through the emotions, throw our old ones away :) Get used to the new names and most of all prepare to spend money. As the months go bye, the excitement just grows and grows. Nothing can compare to it. Eventually the time comes and the console is released....

Birth:

Birth is a wonderful thing, new life is thrown into the world and from that moment its down to its parents to look after it, this is very similar to a release of a console. You queue for hours during the night, the pain of birth you could say :) and then when you finally get it the joy just overwhelms you and your ecstatic about it.

The first few months:

During this time a baby finds its way around. It learns about its surroundings, what it can, can't and shouldn't do. But best of all, it gets millions of presents :) All of the attention is on the baby. Someone comes over, what gets talked about? The baby of course. Its the parents pride and joy. In console terms its the same. The developers try out the hardware they have to work with. They create games that don't push the boundaries, but they do the job and give you a taster of what the console has to come. These games are the consoles presents :)

Their first birthday:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! The baby is a year old. Changes are beginning to happen, the baby is a year wiser and stronger now. Its boundaries increase greatly and the things it is capable of dramatically improve. A consoles graphics get better, the gaming world is used to the console and is ready for its first killer app....or its big birthday present :)

First day at school:

Oooh, nerves are racking now. A big day this and can be compared to a release of a big game. Its a success. Some thigns went wrong, but on the whole it is the childs first steps on the way to the top.

Puberty:

Dear god. This is make or break time for the child. They are becoming an adult and the rest of their life is determined by this stage in their life. They face many challenges, girls/boys, tests, emotions and all the rest of it, but along the way some of the best parts of their life will happen ;) ;) Big games come out, however you always get some shockers. This is the time that consoles can be defeated. They have been out for a while now and without quality software they will fail to continue to influence the console market.

Middle Age:

The main part of any humans life. This is the same for a console. The console just drifts along here, the hype of the release died down a while ago now. No new announcements have been made about a new console. All is quiet in the console world and it just continues to build, much like someone building on their career.

Retirement:

NEW CONSOLE! Whats this you ask? A new console? Cool! Suddenly your present console means nothing to you. It graphics are meagre and the games just don't have the same spark. Everythings been done before, but that new console just looks wonderful you think to yourself. The consoles life begins to come to an end, as does a pensioners at one point or another. Age or illness begins to take over and its turns into a waiting game.

Death:

Production of games for your console stops. The console has come to an end and a new improved version is on the horizon. Life is taken away abruptly by nature, the person, the console, both are dead.

Thanks for reading, MJ
Mon 07/01/02 at 19:33
Regular
Posts: 3,611
Oh yeah. They have only changed it so the title isn't orange. Inside the topic it is orange still. COme on webby...get your act together :)
Mon 07/01/02 at 18:44
Regular
"Eff, you see, kay?"
Posts: 14,156
Nope, still orange in IE too...
Mon 07/01/02 at 17:56
Regular
Posts: 3,611
I see its not orange in Internet Explorer anymore....probably still in Netscape though. Enjoy it :P Anyway, now that its back to normal how about some serious comments?

No problem by the way Jeremy. As long as I know you've read it thats cool :P
Mon 07/01/02 at 12:27
Regular
"Eff, you see, kay?"
Posts: 14,156
Probably, but I always compare it to JPGs. I think it was meant to be a general replacement for EVERYTHING, really. A full 1024x668 screenshot can be up to ~600kb, but hovers around 200kb for me. The shot of the FOG with the Sheepy banner thing takes 181kb.
Mon 07/01/02 at 12:01
Regular
"smile, it's free"
Posts: 6,460
Turbo, wasn't PNG designed as a replacement for .gif's? I haven't compared it's compression ratio to jpg though, so it might well be superior to that all the time, too.

Oh, and I see the html still works in the reply window, as I can see whilst I'm writing this.
Mon 07/01/02 at 11:52
Regular
"Eff, you see, kay?"
Posts: 14,156
Still looks decidedly orange to me :)

http://luke.ac6.org/turbonutter/stuff/screenshot20020107115020.png
Mon 07/01/02 at 10:30
Regular
Posts: 10,437
Well it looks like HTML doesn't work in titles anymore, maybe this means MJ's topic will be taken seriously now.
Mon 07/01/02 at 10:21
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
A new baby can cause sleepless nights, as can a new console as you play it to death!
Mon 07/01/02 at 00:06
Regular
"Eff, you see, kay?"
Posts: 14,156
...or I could just boot Windows and use it, if I could be arsed. I COULD also emulate it, but it'd be a bit slow. I just use the GIMP, which rules. Go into the chainmail compo thread and see my entry.
Sun 06/01/02 at 23:49
Regular
"everyone says it"
Posts: 14,738
Turbonutter wrote:
> Anyway, I can't use Fireworks right now, Linux, remember?

'Pah!'

*laughs*

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