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The SR Witch Project
Foreword: This is just a story loosely based on the Blair Witch Project. It is meant to be taken light-heartedly and no offence is meant to any individuals in any way. Enjoy.
- Three guys went into Basildon forest to discover the legend of the cursed woods, 1 week later their footage was found…
3:33PM
Rickoss: Hey, welcome to the SR witch project we are going to trek into the woods and see what evils we can find
AJ: Quit it Rickoss and give me back my camera
Rickoss: Sorry, I just got excited
AJ: How long is Aliboy going to be in that damn off-licence?
Rickoss: You know Ali and his booze, I’d say another hour
- Rickoss and AJ wait on the bonnet of their car for ages and eventually Aliboy emerges carrying 4 crates of Jack Daniels whiskey.
Aliboy: My lord, am I going to get drunk!
Rickoss: Is this your idea of supplies?
Aliboy: Well, we might be gone all night!
AJ: Didn’t I tell you those AA meetings weren’t working!
- The guys get into AJ’s jeep and drive up to the scary woods, 200 meters from Basildon town centre.
4:20PM
Rickoss: We are now walking in the woods looking for evidence of any disturbances or supernatural activity
AJ: Give me my damn camera, jackass!
Aliboy: Erm, guys, I hate to bother you but I think I left some of my whiskey in the truck, can I go back and get it?
AJ: No, we don’t have time. We need to make an amateur movie and release it before those Blair Witch folks.
5:53PM
Rickoss: I see dead people
Aliboy: When?
Rickoss: All the time…
AJ: Guys, quit messing with my camera, do you know how much that cost me!?
Rickoss: You stole it
AJ: Yes, but shut up!
6:23PM
Aliboy: We have found a plot of flat land and we are going to set up camp before it gets dark. Then we can get absolutely hammered!
AJ: Nobody is going to get hammered; we are going to plot our route for tomorrow.
Rickoss: Um, AJ. Someone replaced the map and compass with whiskey…
Aliboy: What? Why are you looking at me?
AJ: Great Aliboy, Great. Now we are totally lost!
Aliboy: At least we’ve got booze
Rickoss: True, true.
9:38PM
AJ: Aliboy and Rickoss have been drinking since 6:30 and are now both asleep. I am going to put makeup on them and take photos now, goodnight!
3:11AM
Rickoss: AJ, Aliboy! Wake up, there’s someone outside the tent!
AJ: Mmmm Davina McCall in a hot tub
Rickoss: WAKE UP!
- AJ and Aliboy sleepily wipe the sleep out of their eyes and sit up
AJ: What?
Rickoss: There’s someone outside the tent…
Aliboy: Oh sod this, I’m going back to sleep
AJ: I guess we have to investigate
- AJ and Rickoss emerge from the tent, Rickoss in Pyjamas and AJ with a teletubbies sleeping bag around his shoulders. They are both startled by a loud crack and what sounds like a scream.
Rickoss: Did you hear that?
AJ: Yea, I’m scared
Rickoss: Me too…
- A loud menacing scream cuts through the night air and causes Rickoss and AJ to gasp.
Rickoss: What the hell is going on?
AJ: W-Who’s there?
- A shadowy figure walks past in the background but Rickoss is too slow with his torch to see who or what it is
AJ: Just get away from us, we didn’t do anything to you
Rickoss: We’re going to call the police you sick freak
- AJ and Rickoss dive back into the tent and pick up a mobile phone. They begin calling 999 but the battery is low and the phone goes dead.
AJ: Crap, what shall we do?
Rickoss: I have a baseball bat. I will get whoever it is…
AJ: Ok, good luck…
- AJ gets back in his sleeping bag and drifts off to sleep. Rickoss nervously gets out of the tent and tiptoes around looking for the shadowy figure.
Rickoss: Come on… Come to Rickoss…
- The shadowy figure lunges at Rickoss and he hits it with the baseball bat making a sickeningly deep thud. Rickoss kicks the figure until they seem unable to move anymore, he then runs back to the tent to get the torch to reveal the predator. When Rickoss points the flashlight at the spot on the ground where the figure had laid, there was nothing but soil. He searches around but finds nothing, begrudgingly he returns to the tents and falls asleep.
8:34AM
AJ: We have just woken up and are still getting over what happened last night.
Rickoss: The body of whoever was outside the tent last night disappeared but there is blood smeared over the trees around out tent
Aliboy: Goddamn it I am hung over!
AJ: We are going to follow the river upstream and see what we find
11: 41AM
AJ: Guys, about what happened last night…
Rickoss: Don’t worry mate, it wasn’t your fault!
AJ: I wasn’t totally honest when I told you about the legend…
Rickoss: You mean Shrek isn’t really here?
AJ: No Rickoss, sorry, oh and the forest is haunted by the ghost of a maniac mass murdered who eats his victims flesh.
Rickoss: I can’t believe Shrek won’t be here!
Aliboy: Flesh eater, eh?
AJ: That’s right Aliboy
- Aliboy licks his lips and tries to bite AJ’s arm
AJ: Ouch! Did you just bite me?
Aliboy: Erm…No
3:48PM
Rickoss: We have been walking all day and I am shattered, we have come across an old house and AJ went to investigate.
Aliboy: That lad is going to get himself killed you know
- A loud shriek emerges from the house and Rickoss and Aliboy go running to find AJ
Rickoss: AJ, are you ok?
AJ: Yes, I’m fine… why wouldn’t I be?
Aliboy: You screamed…
AJ: No I didn’t. What sort of pansy do you think I am!?
Rickoss: Well someone did and it wasn’t me or Aliboy
AJ: Ah nuts, it’ll be the ghost
Rickoss: How do you know?
AJ: Well this is his house where he killed people and cooked them
Aliboy: Sweeet!
- A loud shriek echoes through the house, startling the guys
Rickoss: I think it’s coming from upstairs
AJ: Lets go
Aliboy: Screw this, don’t you watch movies? This is the bit where someone dies! I am staying down here!
- AJ and Rickoss go upstairs to find the source of the sound whilst Aliboy waits downstairs
AJ: I can’t find anything in here
Rickoss: Me either, maybe it was just an owl?
AJ: Could be, lets go find Aliboy again
Rickoss: Hey Ali, we didn’t find any…
- Rickoss’ speech is halted by what he sees at the bottom of the stairs.
AJ: I-Is that blood?
Rickoss: Oh My God, what’s happened?
AJ: Aliboy!?
- AJ and Rickoss follow the trail of blood into the cellar of the house where the blood trail suddenly stops. There is no more sign of Aliboy despite the two searching the house, top to bottom. Tearfully the two go back to their tent.
9:11PM
Rickoss: We are going to stay here tonight and try and get out of the forest tomorrow and alert the police.
AJ: I think I can figure out which way we came using the positioning of the sun, we will be out if we walk all day tomorrow, I hope nothing happens to us tonight.
7:26AM
Rickoss: We woke up early to get walking but found a little pot outside of our tent
AJ: In the pot was, fingers. Aliboy’s fingers
Rickoss: The sick psycho knew we were here
AJ: We are going to start walking now and hopefully get out of this hellhole before sundown
4:31PM
AJ: We are lost, we have being going around in circles from the last 3 hours
Rickoss: Crap I don’t believe it, there’s the house
AJ: I don’t believe it, we have got nowhere in 9 hours of walking!
8:48PM
Rickoss: We have no choice but to stay here tonight again because it is too dark to walk any more
AJ: I don’t believe this, I just can’t understand what is happening here
11:04PM
Rickoss: Did you hear that?
AJ: A scream?
Rickoss: Yeah, It sounded like Aliboy…
AJ: Lets go, quickly
- Rickoss and AJ run towards the house with torches
AJ: Aliboy, you here mate?
Rickoss: You check upstairs and I’ll check down here
- AJ runs upstairs and Rickoss frantically searches downstairs
AJ: Aliboy, you here?
- AJ searches in all of the upstairs rooms finding nothing and hears a scream from downstairs. He runs down the stairs to see the cellar door slamming and Rickoss’ muffled screams coming from inside.
AJ: Rickoss!
- AJ frantically tries to open the door to the cellar but it is locked. He kicks the door again and again until it opens up but sees no sign of Rickoss. A trail of fresh blood is across the floor of the cellar and it comes to an abrupt halt in the middle of the room. AJ looks up and finds Rickoss strapped to the ceiling, still squirming.
AJ: Oh crap mate, what did he do to you… the sick piece of…
- The cellar door slams shut and the camera falls to the floor. AJ screams and the camera lens is sprayed with blood. The picture flickers and fades.
Foreword: This is just a story loosely based on the Blair Witch Project. It is meant to be taken light-heartedly and no offence is meant to any individuals in any way. Enjoy.
- Three guys went into Basildon forest to discover the legend of the cursed woods, 1 week later their footage was found…
3:33PM
Rickoss: Hey, welcome to the SR witch project we are going to trek into the woods and see what evils we can find
AJ: Quit it Rickoss and give me back my camera
Rickoss: Sorry, I just got excited
AJ: How long is Aliboy going to be in that damn off-licence?
Rickoss: You know Ali and his booze, I’d say another hour
- Rickoss and AJ wait on the bonnet of their car for ages and eventually Aliboy emerges carrying 4 crates of Jack Daniels whiskey.
Aliboy: My lord, am I going to get drunk!
Rickoss: Is this your idea of supplies?
Aliboy: Well, we might be gone all night!
AJ: Didn’t I tell you those AA meetings weren’t working!
- The guys get into AJ’s jeep and drive up to the scary woods, 200 meters from Basildon town centre.
4:20PM
Rickoss: We are now walking in the woods looking for evidence of any disturbances or supernatural activity
AJ: Give me my damn camera, jackass!
Aliboy: Erm, guys, I hate to bother you but I think I left some of my whiskey in the truck, can I go back and get it?
AJ: No, we don’t have time. We need to make an amateur movie and release it before those Blair Witch folks.
5:53PM
Rickoss: I see dead people
Aliboy: When?
Rickoss: All the time…
AJ: Guys, quit messing with my camera, do you know how much that cost me!?
Rickoss: You stole it
AJ: Yes, but shut up!
6:23PM
Aliboy: We have found a plot of flat land and we are going to set up camp before it gets dark. Then we can get absolutely hammered!
AJ: Nobody is going to get hammered; we are going to plot our route for tomorrow.
Rickoss: Um, AJ. Someone replaced the map and compass with whiskey…
Aliboy: What? Why are you looking at me?
AJ: Great Aliboy, Great. Now we are totally lost!
Aliboy: At least we’ve got booze
Rickoss: True, true.
9:38PM
AJ: Aliboy and Rickoss have been drinking since 6:30 and are now both asleep. I am going to put makeup on them and take photos now, goodnight!
3:11AM
Rickoss: AJ, Aliboy! Wake up, there’s someone outside the tent!
AJ: Mmmm Davina McCall in a hot tub
Rickoss: WAKE UP!
- AJ and Aliboy sleepily wipe the sleep out of their eyes and sit up
AJ: What?
Rickoss: There’s someone outside the tent…
Aliboy: Oh sod this, I’m going back to sleep
AJ: I guess we have to investigate
- AJ and Rickoss emerge from the tent, Rickoss in Pyjamas and AJ with a teletubbies sleeping bag around his shoulders. They are both startled by a loud crack and what sounds like a scream.
Rickoss: Did you hear that?
AJ: Yea, I’m scared
Rickoss: Me too…
- A loud menacing scream cuts through the night air and causes Rickoss and AJ to gasp.
Rickoss: What the hell is going on?
AJ: W-Who’s there?
- A shadowy figure walks past in the background but Rickoss is too slow with his torch to see who or what it is
AJ: Just get away from us, we didn’t do anything to you
Rickoss: We’re going to call the police you sick freak
- AJ and Rickoss dive back into the tent and pick up a mobile phone. They begin calling 999 but the battery is low and the phone goes dead.
AJ: Crap, what shall we do?
Rickoss: I have a baseball bat. I will get whoever it is…
AJ: Ok, good luck…
- AJ gets back in his sleeping bag and drifts off to sleep. Rickoss nervously gets out of the tent and tiptoes around looking for the shadowy figure.
Rickoss: Come on… Come to Rickoss…
- The shadowy figure lunges at Rickoss and he hits it with the baseball bat making a sickeningly deep thud. Rickoss kicks the figure until they seem unable to move anymore, he then runs back to the tent to get the torch to reveal the predator. When Rickoss points the flashlight at the spot on the ground where the figure had laid, there was nothing but soil. He searches around but finds nothing, begrudgingly he returns to the tents and falls asleep.
8:34AM
AJ: We have just woken up and are still getting over what happened last night.
Rickoss: The body of whoever was outside the tent last night disappeared but there is blood smeared over the trees around out tent
Aliboy: Goddamn it I am hung over!
AJ: We are going to follow the river upstream and see what we find
11: 41AM
AJ: Guys, about what happened last night…
Rickoss: Don’t worry mate, it wasn’t your fault!
AJ: I wasn’t totally honest when I told you about the legend…
Rickoss: You mean Shrek isn’t really here?
AJ: No Rickoss, sorry, oh and the forest is haunted by the ghost of a maniac mass murdered who eats his victims flesh.
Rickoss: I can’t believe Shrek won’t be here!
Aliboy: Flesh eater, eh?
AJ: That’s right Aliboy
- Aliboy licks his lips and tries to bite AJ’s arm
AJ: Ouch! Did you just bite me?
Aliboy: Erm…No
3:48PM
Rickoss: We have been walking all day and I am shattered, we have come across an old house and AJ went to investigate.
Aliboy: That lad is going to get himself killed you know
- A loud shriek emerges from the house and Rickoss and Aliboy go running to find AJ
Rickoss: AJ, are you ok?
AJ: Yes, I’m fine… why wouldn’t I be?
Aliboy: You screamed…
AJ: No I didn’t. What sort of pansy do you think I am!?
Rickoss: Well someone did and it wasn’t me or Aliboy
AJ: Ah nuts, it’ll be the ghost
Rickoss: How do you know?
AJ: Well this is his house where he killed people and cooked them
Aliboy: Sweeet!
- A loud shriek echoes through the house, startling the guys
Rickoss: I think it’s coming from upstairs
AJ: Lets go
Aliboy: Screw this, don’t you watch movies? This is the bit where someone dies! I am staying down here!
- AJ and Rickoss go upstairs to find the source of the sound whilst Aliboy waits downstairs
AJ: I can’t find anything in here
Rickoss: Me either, maybe it was just an owl?
AJ: Could be, lets go find Aliboy again
Rickoss: Hey Ali, we didn’t find any…
- Rickoss’ speech is halted by what he sees at the bottom of the stairs.
AJ: I-Is that blood?
Rickoss: Oh My God, what’s happened?
AJ: Aliboy!?
- AJ and Rickoss follow the trail of blood into the cellar of the house where the blood trail suddenly stops. There is no more sign of Aliboy despite the two searching the house, top to bottom. Tearfully the two go back to their tent.
9:11PM
Rickoss: We are going to stay here tonight and try and get out of the forest tomorrow and alert the police.
AJ: I think I can figure out which way we came using the positioning of the sun, we will be out if we walk all day tomorrow, I hope nothing happens to us tonight.
7:26AM
Rickoss: We woke up early to get walking but found a little pot outside of our tent
AJ: In the pot was, fingers. Aliboy’s fingers
Rickoss: The sick psycho knew we were here
AJ: We are going to start walking now and hopefully get out of this hellhole before sundown
4:31PM
AJ: We are lost, we have being going around in circles from the last 3 hours
Rickoss: Crap I don’t believe it, there’s the house
AJ: I don’t believe it, we have got nowhere in 9 hours of walking!
8:48PM
Rickoss: We have no choice but to stay here tonight again because it is too dark to walk any more
AJ: I don’t believe this, I just can’t understand what is happening here
11:04PM
Rickoss: Did you hear that?
AJ: A scream?
Rickoss: Yeah, It sounded like Aliboy…
AJ: Lets go, quickly
- Rickoss and AJ run towards the house with torches
AJ: Aliboy, you here mate?
Rickoss: You check upstairs and I’ll check down here
- AJ runs upstairs and Rickoss frantically searches downstairs
AJ: Aliboy, you here?
- AJ searches in all of the upstairs rooms finding nothing and hears a scream from downstairs. He runs down the stairs to see the cellar door slamming and Rickoss’ muffled screams coming from inside.
AJ: Rickoss!
- AJ frantically tries to open the door to the cellar but it is locked. He kicks the door again and again until it opens up but sees no sign of Rickoss. A trail of fresh blood is across the floor of the cellar and it comes to an abrupt halt in the middle of the room. AJ looks up and finds Rickoss strapped to the ceiling, still squirming.
AJ: Oh crap mate, what did he do to you… the sick piece of…
- The cellar door slams shut and the camera falls to the floor. AJ screams and the camera lens is sprayed with blood. The picture flickers and fades.
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Excellent, again
Kyz22 wrote:
> BLAHpro wrote:
> Very good! You might be in for a chance at a GAD...
>
> Yes but technically so is every other topic posted today!
Thats a good point. I may even win a GAD for this post here. *crosses fingers*
> BLAHpro wrote:
> Very good! You might be in for a chance at a GAD...
>
> Yes but technically so is every other topic posted today!
Thats a good point. I may even win a GAD for this post here. *crosses fingers*
Brilliant :-)
And yay for having a great cast of characters :-D
And yay for having a great cast of characters :-D
BLAHpro wrote:
> Very good! You might be in for a chance at a GAD...
Yes but technically so is every other topic posted today!
> Very good! You might be in for a chance at a GAD...
Yes but technically so is every other topic posted today!
Dear God... not another topic!
Very good! You might be in for a chance at a GAD...
Would Special Reserve take kindly to me posting a big long story on the forums though?
Nice.
Write a proper story soon though, because I want to read what you can write when you really put your mind to it.
Write a proper story soon though, because I want to read what you can write when you really put your mind to it.
Cheers for the comments guys :-)
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