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"Do RPG's mean you are sad? (Shock results)"

Common opinion of RPG players is similar to that of Trekkies.
Twisted, demented loners with a face like a pineapple and the social skills of Keith Moon after being awake for 3 days.

But is this image deserved?
New games website "womenfrightenme.com" commisioned a survey to discover exactly why RPG games have the air of desperate sadness to them.
The results are shocking and to be expected:
The survey had the following questions:

1 - When greeted with a member of the opposite sex, do you
(a) Say hello
(b) Cower and wait for them to turn into a witch
(c) Wonder why there are not clothed in metal thongs and armed with a sword, like on the posters you have

2 - When involved in a brawl, do you
(a) Roll around on the floor and punch lamely
(b) Roll a dice and try to cast a spell of protection
(c) Never had a fight because you don't go outside

3 - When you are given a rucksack for Xmas, do you
(a) Say thanks and put things in it
(b) Put it in the cupboard and forget about it
(c) Load up with provisions and go on a quest in the woods

4 - When your friends ask if you're coming out tonight do you
(a) Ask what time and meet them later
(b) Stay indoors and level-up your pixie
(c) What are friends?

---

Upon collating the evidence from the survey and knocking on doors (when not greeted with nervous glances from upstairs windows), common opinion is this:

RPG games are the domain of pasty geeks with greasy hair, t-shirts with goblins and dragons on and are uninhabited by females.

There was some protest from the RPG community, mainly along the lines of "One of us...we fear the stranger...keeeel him", but were told to shut up by someone with a tan and mates.
This comes as no suprise to those that steer clear of such folk,although they are known to congregate in "Games Workshops" in towns the length of the lands.
Such places are usually run by a paunchy single man in his early thirties with straggly hair called "Gary" ("Smeefwip" to his Elf mates).

One wishes that the stereotype of RPG players was a myth, but it isn't.

1 - When greeted with a member of the opposite sex, do you
(a) Say hello
(b) Cower and wait for them to turn into a witch
(c) Wonder why there are not clothed in metal thongs and armed with a sword, like on the posters you have

I choose my own category.... 'invite them back to my room for coffee'

2 - When involved in a brawl, do you
(a) Roll around on the floor and punch lamely
(b) Roll a dice and try to cast a spell of protection
(c) Never had a fight because you don't go outside

I punch the three highest pressure points on the head, then I break in and collapse his knee caps. No idiot or sane man starts on me

3 - When you are given a rucksack for Xmas, do you
(a) Say thanks and put things in it
(b) Put it in the cupboard and forget about it
(c) Load up with provisions and go on a quest in the woods

I see if it has the receipt so I can get the money back, then with that money I go buy another Yes album.

4 - When your friends ask if you're coming out tonight do you
(a) Ask what time and meet them later
(b) Stay indoors and level-up your pixie
(c) What are friends?

I say 'yeah, I am here waiting.. you better hurry, these ladies are moving fast'

rpg do consume a lot of time but there still good.

Well, if they're not proper beards..

In seriousness though, play Deus Ex and Skies of Arcadia instead. They're RPG's, and only with perhaps one or two beards in, and they aren't real beards, they're more like goatys.

You ever been in one of those Games Workshop places? My strange cousin collects it, so I had to go in and but something. Armed with the names he had given me, which looked pretty wierd, i went in. The conversation went something like this:

" Hi!" He had a ponytail, because ponytails are "cool." He didn't have a tatoo of an elf though. I was disappointed.

"Yes..I want some Eldar stuff."

" WICKED! We've got the new Eldar somethingorother hover bike."

*pattering feet as Stryke runs*

I generally LMAO at everything.

I despair.
I really do.

My news stories today had references to classic literature, a cult movie from the 80s and some stuff courtesy of Chris Morris.

Yet it degenerated into which console is best.

*shakes head*

See, they're just like dogs. Stroke them in the right places and they'll fetch your slippers.

Grix Thraves wrote:
> No, it just hasn't evolved far enough yet. Watch.

Goatboy is gay!


he he he! If I really did laugh out loud, an I allowed to say lol?

(Damn, I typed LOL, please don't ban me, please...)

If only.