Viewing Thread:
"THEY'RE MULTIPLYING!!!!!!!!!!!"

Ok, Steps have split up. Good news for some, but not ol' Monkeyman. You see, I've been orbiting the Earth for the last four months in my 'Rock Shuttle' (you know, the one that seeks and destroys crappy pop bands) and I was alerted by a beep on the 'pop-radar'. What I saw shocked me...more than when Optimus Prime died in Transformers. The large green blob that was Steps split into 5 seperate bodies - each with their own albums! Do you realise what this means kiddies? If pop bands form and then seperate at this rate, they'll engulfe the Earth in a matter of weeks. Something has to be done. I need your help. Uncle Monkey needs you. I'm setting up a crack team of 'Rock commandos' to infiltrate and destroy pop bands everywhere. All you have to do to join is put one hand on your heart and on the screen and recite:

I (insert name here) swear to seek out and destroy all pop bands.
Whenever there is pop I shall inject rock
And wherever there is rock I shall rock some more
May the power of the hooded monkey compell me

Now you are initiated you may choose from a multitude of missions. For instance:
1. Impregnation of Girl Bands:
Your mission (should you choose to accept it) is to get as many girl band members pregnant. That'll stop 'em singing for a good few months. But once they start up again you'll have to repeat the task.
2. Infiltration of Boy Bands:
For this one you must clean up your act and make into the next big boy-band. Then when on stage you pull down your trousers and tell all the little children to kiss your smiling a**e. A medal of honour is available for this if you encourage other members of the band to do it as well.
3. The Sack Tap;
Easy! Just make it into another boy-girl band and then reveal yourself to be gay. For some reason it's always a sore spot for cleancut images, so get an interview with 'Pop Weekly', then grab your crotch and say 'They just can't get enough'. That'll ruin a few careers.

I'll keep an eye on the 'pop-radar' to see how it's going.

Monkeyman signing out.

Lord Semajal wrote:
> I agree!!! The best idea was no 1.
The other good way to get rid of these
> bands is to introduce them to Eminem. He would scare the S*** out of them and
> they would never perform again.
I hate these bands who have 1 hit then
> dissapear. Its the record companies exploiting people.

What about people that keep on having hits when they shouldn't. Eminem is a prime example of this. He's nothing more than short, white trailer-trash and wouldn't scare even H from steps.

monkey_man wrote:
Now you are initiated you may choose from a multitude of
> missions. For instance:
1. Impregnation of Girl Bands:
Your mission (should
> you choose to accept it) is to get as many girl band members pregnant.
--

So like David Beckham then?
----

2. Infiltration of Boy Bands:
Then when on stage you
> pull down your trousers and tell all the little children to kiss your smiling
> a**e.
--

So like Robbie Williams then?

----
3. The Sack Tap;
Easy! Just make it into another
> boy-girl band and then reveal yourself to be gay

---

So like that one from Boyzone then?
-----

Nice ideas, but you would either become David "er...." Beckham, Robbie "I love me I do!" Williams and Bland Gay Bloke from Boyzone.

Far better to just let them do their solo thing, and watch them crash and burn like every single Spice Girl has, like every single Take That has (R Williams is finished, you read it here 1st kids).

I agree!!!

The best idea was no 1.

The other good way to get rid of these bands is to introduce them to Eminem. He would scare the S*** out of them and they would never perform again.

I hate these bands who have 1 hit then dissapear. Its the record companies exploiting people.

I'm sure I could just about stomach getting Rachel from S Club knocked up... all in the name of Rock :)

What a man!

I don't get hungover.

ARe you still hung over Ali?

Especially the bit about impregnating girl bands.

I totally agree with everything mentioned in the above post.

Ok, Steps have split up. Good news for some, but not ol' Monkeyman. You see, I've been orbiting the Earth for the last four months in my 'Rock Shuttle' (you know, the one that seeks and destroys crappy pop bands) and I was alerted by a beep on the 'pop-radar'. What I saw shocked me...more than when Optimus Prime died in Transformers. The large green blob that was Steps split into 5 seperate bodies - each with their own albums! Do you realise what this means kiddies? If pop bands form and then seperate at this rate, they'll engulfe the Earth in a matter of weeks. Something has to be done. I need your help. Uncle Monkey needs you. I'm setting up a crack team of 'Rock commandos' to infiltrate and destroy pop bands everywhere. All you have to do to join is put one hand on your heart and on the screen and recite:

I (insert name here) swear to seek out and destroy all pop bands.
Whenever there is pop I shall inject rock
And wherever there is rock I shall rock some more
May the power of the hooded monkey compell me

Now you are initiated you may choose from a multitude of missions. For instance:
1. Impregnation of Girl Bands:
Your mission (should you choose to accept it) is to get as many girl band members pregnant. That'll stop 'em singing for a good few months. But once they start up again you'll have to repeat the task.
2. Infiltration of Boy Bands:
For this one you must clean up your act and make into the next big boy-band. Then when on stage you pull down your trousers and tell all the little children to kiss your smiling a**e. A medal of honour is available for this if you encourage other members of the band to do it as well.
3. The Sack Tap;
Easy! Just make it into another boy-girl band and then reveal yourself to be gay. For some reason it's always a sore spot for cleancut images, so get an interview with 'Pop Weekly', then grab your crotch and say 'They just can't get enough'. That'll ruin a few careers.

I'll keep an eye on the 'pop-radar' to see how it's going.

Monkeyman signing out.