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Millions were made redundant in Japan last night, as Shigeru Miyomoto San, fired every single one of Nintendo's employees and sucked up his superiors in a red wheely vacuum cleaner, after humiliating them by jumping over their heads whilst hovering with the aid of a small water cannon that seemed to defy the laws of A)physics and B)fun. After one hour of all nintendos honchos had been sucked up by Mr. Miyamoto and his vacuum, Nintendo H.Q was empty and devoid of all life, Miyomoto actually being a robot trying to bring about mass lonerism because of his deep hatred for friendship, and people. This bold strike on the H.Q was probably due to the fact that he had released a game where you ran around streets naked, (it reminded him of his childhood) and he was due to be sacked.
Earlier this morning, Mr. M revealed his secret V.2 missiles, which were contained inside his cheeks (and people wondered why they were so big and chubby.) and with them, destroyed all communications sattleites, so that people wouldn't be able to talk to eachother and the final one was directed at Des Lynam, for being such a terrible mario promoter, though Des Lynam, being the next fonz, escaped in a spaceship made especially for him. Then, He jumped onto a lorry, without even saying sorry.
An hour ago, the results of the Japanese democratic elections came out, amongst the new faces, are the oddly named minister of foreign affairs,"ariomay", the minister of agriculture, "Marvest hoon harctercay" and the minister of war "sumas", who promises to eliminate all threat of people actually communicating with eachother. Allready rumours have surfaced, suggesting that the elections were rigged, Shigeru responded by throwing odd coloured animals with flowers on their heads, into peoples eyes.
Amongst the new laws to be imposed on Japan during the next month, there seem to be some very odd ones indeed. Here are some quotes from the new political agenda. " A giant wall is to be built around Japan just to make sure that no computer games are imported to the rest of the world." "Multiplayer computer games are banned unless bots are used, People playing games together is punishable by death" and the oddest of them all, " Everyone must attend banjo lessons."
It seems to be the case that Japan will be under the influence of Shigeru for the forseeable future, And rumour has it that Mr. Miyamoto is intending to become the sole inhabitant of Japan, after he releases an epilepsy inducing original cartoon (which the law decrees you must watch) called okepom in which strange creatures send out humans to fight by throwing them around in little blue and white balls.
What can we expect from the David Blaine of gaming next? Most likely another spin off.
Melancholy
Earlier this morning, Mr. M revealed his secret V.2 missiles, which were contained inside his cheeks (and people wondered why they were so big and chubby.) and with them, destroyed all communications sattleites, so that people wouldn't be able to talk to eachother and the final one was directed at Des Lynam, for being such a terrible mario promoter, though Des Lynam, being the next fonz, escaped in a spaceship made especially for him. Then, He jumped onto a lorry, without even saying sorry.
An hour ago, the results of the Japanese democratic elections came out, amongst the new faces, are the oddly named minister of foreign affairs,"ariomay", the minister of agriculture, "Marvest hoon harctercay" and the minister of war "sumas", who promises to eliminate all threat of people actually communicating with eachother. Allready rumours have surfaced, suggesting that the elections were rigged, Shigeru responded by throwing odd coloured animals with flowers on their heads, into peoples eyes.
Amongst the new laws to be imposed on Japan during the next month, there seem to be some very odd ones indeed. Here are some quotes from the new political agenda. " A giant wall is to be built around Japan just to make sure that no computer games are imported to the rest of the world." "Multiplayer computer games are banned unless bots are used, People playing games together is punishable by death" and the oddest of them all, " Everyone must attend banjo lessons."
It seems to be the case that Japan will be under the influence of Shigeru for the forseeable future, And rumour has it that Mr. Miyamoto is intending to become the sole inhabitant of Japan, after he releases an epilepsy inducing original cartoon (which the law decrees you must watch) called okepom in which strange creatures send out humans to fight by throwing them around in little blue and white balls.
What can we expect from the David Blaine of gaming next? Most likely another spin off.
Melancholy
NOO! SHIGSY HAS GONE EEEVIL!!
Millions were made redundant in Japan last night, as Shigeru Miyomoto San, fired every single one of Nintendo's employees and sucked up his superiors in a red wheely vacuum cleaner, after humiliating them by jumping over their heads whilst hovering with the aid of a small water cannon that seemed to defy the laws of A)physics and B)fun. After one hour of all nintendos honchos had been sucked up by Mr. Miyamoto and his vacuum, Nintendo H.Q was empty and devoid of all life, Miyomoto actually being a robot trying to bring about mass lonerism because of his deep hatred for friendship, and people. This bold strike on the H.Q was probably due to the fact that he had released a game where you ran around streets naked, (it reminded him of his childhood) and he was due to be sacked.
Earlier this morning, Mr. M revealed his secret V.2 missiles, which were contained inside his cheeks (and people wondered why they were so big and chubby.) and with them, destroyed all communications sattleites, so that people wouldn't be able to talk to eachother and the final one was directed at Des Lynam, for being such a terrible mario promoter, though Des Lynam, being the next fonz, escaped in a spaceship made especially for him. Then, He jumped onto a lorry, without even saying sorry.
An hour ago, the results of the Japanese democratic elections came out, amongst the new faces, are the oddly named minister of foreign affairs,"ariomay", the minister of agriculture, "Marvest hoon harctercay" and the minister of war "sumas", who promises to eliminate all threat of people actually communicating with eachother. Allready rumours have surfaced, suggesting that the elections were rigged, Shigeru responded by throwing odd coloured animals with flowers on their heads, into peoples eyes.
Amongst the new laws to be imposed on Japan during the next month, there seem to be some very odd ones indeed. Here are some quotes from the new political agenda. " A giant wall is to be built around Japan just to make sure that no computer games are imported to the rest of the world." "Multiplayer computer games are banned unless bots are used, People playing games together is punishable by death" and the oddest of them all, " Everyone must attend banjo lessons."
It seems to be the case that Japan will be under the influence of Shigeru for the forseeable future, And rumour has it that Mr. Miyamoto is intending to become the sole inhabitant of Japan, after he releases an epilepsy inducing original cartoon (which the law decrees you must watch) called okepom in which strange creatures send out humans to fight by throwing them around in little blue and white balls.
What can we expect from the David Blaine of gaming next? Most likely another spin off.
Melancholy
Earlier this morning, Mr. M revealed his secret V.2 missiles, which were contained inside his cheeks (and people wondered why they were so big and chubby.) and with them, destroyed all communications sattleites, so that people wouldn't be able to talk to eachother and the final one was directed at Des Lynam, for being such a terrible mario promoter, though Des Lynam, being the next fonz, escaped in a spaceship made especially for him. Then, He jumped onto a lorry, without even saying sorry.
An hour ago, the results of the Japanese democratic elections came out, amongst the new faces, are the oddly named minister of foreign affairs,"ariomay", the minister of agriculture, "Marvest hoon harctercay" and the minister of war "sumas", who promises to eliminate all threat of people actually communicating with eachother. Allready rumours have surfaced, suggesting that the elections were rigged, Shigeru responded by throwing odd coloured animals with flowers on their heads, into peoples eyes.
Amongst the new laws to be imposed on Japan during the next month, there seem to be some very odd ones indeed. Here are some quotes from the new political agenda. " A giant wall is to be built around Japan just to make sure that no computer games are imported to the rest of the world." "Multiplayer computer games are banned unless bots are used, People playing games together is punishable by death" and the oddest of them all, " Everyone must attend banjo lessons."
It seems to be the case that Japan will be under the influence of Shigeru for the forseeable future, And rumour has it that Mr. Miyamoto is intending to become the sole inhabitant of Japan, after he releases an epilepsy inducing original cartoon (which the law decrees you must watch) called okepom in which strange creatures send out humans to fight by throwing them around in little blue and white balls.
What can we expect from the David Blaine of gaming next? Most likely another spin off.
Melancholy