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I found these funny quotes on a site somewhere so i decided to share them all with you
"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious."
- Alan Minter, Boxer
"I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."
- Alicia Silverstone, Actress
"Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier."
- Anonymous Traffic Report
"We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather. Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather."
- Arab News report
"Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again."
- Barbara Boxer, Senator
"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears, Pop Singer
"SUPREME COURT REULES THAT MURDERERS SHALL NOT BE ELECTROCUTED
TWICE FOR THE SAME CRIME."
- Cleveland Daily News, Headline
"Better make it six, I can't eat eight."
- Dan Osinski, Baseball pitcher, when a waitress asked if he wanted his pizza cut into six or eight slices
"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
- George Gobel
funny !
"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious."
- Alan Minter, Boxer
"I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."
- Alicia Silverstone, Actress
"Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier."
- Anonymous Traffic Report
"We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather. Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather."
- Arab News report
"Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again."
- Barbara Boxer, Senator
"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears, Pop Singer
"SUPREME COURT REULES THAT MURDERERS SHALL NOT BE ELECTROCUTED
TWICE FOR THE SAME CRIME."
- Cleveland Daily News, Headline
"Better make it six, I can't eat eight."
- Dan Osinski, Baseball pitcher, when a waitress asked if he wanted his pizza cut into six or eight slices
"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
- George Gobel
funny !
Most of our imports come from other countries
George "Dubya" Bush
George "Dubya" Bush
Football managers produce some of the greatest stupid statements. As was pointed out in “the official Championship Manager mag.”
“We must have had 99 per cent of the game, it was the other three per cent that cost us the game.”
The owner of this great mathematic brain is non other then Ruud Gullit.
“I’m not a believer in luck…but I do believe you need it.”
Great philosopher Alan Ball came up with that one.
“I felt a lump in my mouth when the ball went in.”
He hasn’t been able to say this recently, Terry Venables.
“When I win I am lucky and when I lose I am a donkey. It’s not a good balance.”
Yes...right...I think this may have been when Claudio Ranieri first moved from Italy, and I’m guessing English wasn’t his best subject at school.
“If it had gone in, it would have been a goal.”
Thanks for pointing that one out Joe Royle.
“I’m not going to make it a target, but it’s something I aim for.”
Steve Coppell takes a minute out of training his players to improve their education, this week was English and what contradiction means.
“I honestly believe we can go all the way to Wembley, unless someone knocks us out.”
Dave Bassett went out on a limb with that one.
“I never comment on referees and I’m not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.”
Ron Atkinson, always the subtle gentle flower.
“David Johnson has scored 62 goals in 148 games for Ipswich and those statistics tell me that he plays games and scores goals.”
It’s logical thinking like that from David Platt which is the reason England Under 21’s are the force to be reckoned with that they are.
“We must have had 99 per cent of the game, it was the other three per cent that cost us the game.”
The owner of this great mathematic brain is non other then Ruud Gullit.
“I’m not a believer in luck…but I do believe you need it.”
Great philosopher Alan Ball came up with that one.
“I felt a lump in my mouth when the ball went in.”
He hasn’t been able to say this recently, Terry Venables.
“When I win I am lucky and when I lose I am a donkey. It’s not a good balance.”
Yes...right...I think this may have been when Claudio Ranieri first moved from Italy, and I’m guessing English wasn’t his best subject at school.
“If it had gone in, it would have been a goal.”
Thanks for pointing that one out Joe Royle.
“I’m not going to make it a target, but it’s something I aim for.”
Steve Coppell takes a minute out of training his players to improve their education, this week was English and what contradiction means.
“I honestly believe we can go all the way to Wembley, unless someone knocks us out.”
Dave Bassett went out on a limb with that one.
“I never comment on referees and I’m not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.”
Ron Atkinson, always the subtle gentle flower.
“David Johnson has scored 62 goals in 148 games for Ipswich and those statistics tell me that he plays games and scores goals.”
It’s logical thinking like that from David Platt which is the reason England Under 21’s are the force to be reckoned with that they are.
Most of those came from private-eye.
Only the daft quotes were funny.
Man, some people are stupid.
Man, some people are stupid.
I found these funny quotes on a site somewhere so i decided to share them all with you
"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious."
- Alan Minter, Boxer
"I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."
- Alicia Silverstone, Actress
"Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier."
- Anonymous Traffic Report
"We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather. Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather."
- Arab News report
"Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again."
- Barbara Boxer, Senator
"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears, Pop Singer
"SUPREME COURT REULES THAT MURDERERS SHALL NOT BE ELECTROCUTED
TWICE FOR THE SAME CRIME."
- Cleveland Daily News, Headline
"Better make it six, I can't eat eight."
- Dan Osinski, Baseball pitcher, when a waitress asked if he wanted his pizza cut into six or eight slices
"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
- George Gobel
funny !
"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious."
- Alan Minter, Boxer
"I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."
- Alicia Silverstone, Actress
"Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier."
- Anonymous Traffic Report
"We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather. Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather."
- Arab News report
"Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again."
- Barbara Boxer, Senator
"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears, Pop Singer
"SUPREME COURT REULES THAT MURDERERS SHALL NOT BE ELECTROCUTED
TWICE FOR THE SAME CRIME."
- Cleveland Daily News, Headline
"Better make it six, I can't eat eight."
- Dan Osinski, Baseball pitcher, when a waitress asked if he wanted his pizza cut into six or eight slices
"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
- George Gobel
funny !