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-Best enjoyed if you put the posh voice of Prince Charles on the doctor and the voice of Frodo's pal (can't remember his name) on Jamie-
---
*Dr Who theme tune plays only this time with fart noises replacing the usual tone*
`Travelling through time and space trying to find somewhere to have a big sheet`
Dr Poo runs from the distance, clutching his newspaper under one arm and holding his hat down with another, being chased by shiny-suited creatures"
Jamie: Quick! Hurry Doctor they're gaining on ye!
Cyborgs: *mumble* No chance to escape. Your position is futile *mumble*
"After legging it a good 100 metres, Dr Poo eventually escapes the cyborgs and enters his voyager, namely 'Bog Roll 3000'"
Jamie: Did you manage to drop it Doctor?
Doc: Did I fudge. I had my shreddies down and I was aching to pile off. Next thing I knew, these bloody cybermen are coming after me.
*Jamie fiddles with some buttons in front of him*
Doc: Set the coordinates for anywhere in space with plenty of bushes Jamie.. Urr, no ice planets mind.
"Still surrounded by Cyborgs, Bog Roll 3000 sets off, making with it a squeamish sound, until it soon reaches a halt"
Jamie: I think we've found a quiet spot, Doctor. No apparent life forms, oxygen at 20%.
Doc: Fudge that. Let me out! I've got a brown trout to drop.
"Dr Poo leaves Bog Roll 3000 once again with his newspaper under one arm and his brightly coloured scarf round his neck blowing in the wind, and all he can see is a beach-like location with nothing else, but water and sand in sight"
Doc: Get in! No one to bloody mind.
*He picks a nice spot and settles down with his newspaper*
Doc: Aaagh. This is going to be fabulous. It's in the bombie.. here we go.
*Newspaper (Daily Mirror) reads: - Pamela Anderson drinks cup of tea(front cover - Gazza drinks cup of tea(back cover) with a picture of a naked woman on both sides*
Jamie: Doctor! Look out! Behind ye! Sea devils!
"Dr Poo quickly gets up and runs towards the ship, clutching his hat and newspaper once again"
Doc: Oh bloody hell! All of time and space at my fingertips and I can't find anywhere to drop my bunch.
Inside Bog Roll 3000 ...
Doc: Right Jamie. I've just remembered, there's a top notch little prodgy on Metamius 3. Quick! Set the coordinates, I've got the turtle's head.
*Whilst Bog Roll heads for its new location...*
Doc: Hurry up for fudge's sake. I think I'm touching cloth.
"Bog Roll 3000 lands on a pink outland.
Dr Poo heads out and repeats his usual running style (hat in one hand and newspaper in the other), making his way over to a secluded wooden cubical, positioned right next to a Grand Clock (which reads 2 O'clock)"
*He quickly swings open the cubical door*
Doc: The Marster. Fudge! What are you doing in there?
Marster: Sorry Doctor, but I was on the pot last night on Zapharus. Got the squirts something rotten, I think I'll be in here all day.
Doc: Barsted!
"As Doctor Poo slams the door shut, the Master lets a runny one go..."
Marster: Oooooh yeeeaaah.
"Meanwhile, the Doc makes his way back into the Voyager 3000..."
Doc: Right. Set the coordinates.. anywhere. I'm absolutely fudging desperate! We've got to find somewhere right now or I'll sheet my bloody pants! I'm chewing a fudging brick.
Jamie: Right Doctor.
After about three seconds..
Jamie: Okay, here we are Doctor.
Doc: Where?
Jamie: The planet Starro.
Doc: Well fudging done. It's only the planet of the fudging Darlics. But shy not, I need a sheet big time! Open those doors before I lay a stone of dogs eggs in my strides.
"The Door zaps open as the doctor legs it out once again"
Darlics: Halt! Halt! Intruder! Intruder! Heading for Dabrose's private sheethouse. Intruder! Intruder!
Meanwhile, in Dabros's toilet
Doc: Aaagh. At long larst. I fudging needed that.
"Suddenly, the cubical door is zapped by the darlics, leaving a massive hole and clearly showing Dr Poo stunned on the bog"
Darlics: You filthy b******d! You filthy b******d!
*Dabros appears*
Dabros: Has anyone got some tissue?
Doc: Sorry Dabros. I'll give it ten minutes if I were you.
*Theme tune plays out*
(PS: Dr Poo likes fudge)
---
*Dr Who theme tune plays only this time with fart noises replacing the usual tone*
`Travelling through time and space trying to find somewhere to have a big sheet`
Dr Poo runs from the distance, clutching his newspaper under one arm and holding his hat down with another, being chased by shiny-suited creatures"
Jamie: Quick! Hurry Doctor they're gaining on ye!
Cyborgs: *mumble* No chance to escape. Your position is futile *mumble*
"After legging it a good 100 metres, Dr Poo eventually escapes the cyborgs and enters his voyager, namely 'Bog Roll 3000'"
Jamie: Did you manage to drop it Doctor?
Doc: Did I fudge. I had my shreddies down and I was aching to pile off. Next thing I knew, these bloody cybermen are coming after me.
*Jamie fiddles with some buttons in front of him*
Doc: Set the coordinates for anywhere in space with plenty of bushes Jamie.. Urr, no ice planets mind.
"Still surrounded by Cyborgs, Bog Roll 3000 sets off, making with it a squeamish sound, until it soon reaches a halt"
Jamie: I think we've found a quiet spot, Doctor. No apparent life forms, oxygen at 20%.
Doc: Fudge that. Let me out! I've got a brown trout to drop.
"Dr Poo leaves Bog Roll 3000 once again with his newspaper under one arm and his brightly coloured scarf round his neck blowing in the wind, and all he can see is a beach-like location with nothing else, but water and sand in sight"
Doc: Get in! No one to bloody mind.
*He picks a nice spot and settles down with his newspaper*
Doc: Aaagh. This is going to be fabulous. It's in the bombie.. here we go.
*Newspaper (Daily Mirror) reads: - Pamela Anderson drinks cup of tea(front cover - Gazza drinks cup of tea(back cover) with a picture of a naked woman on both sides*
Jamie: Doctor! Look out! Behind ye! Sea devils!
"Dr Poo quickly gets up and runs towards the ship, clutching his hat and newspaper once again"
Doc: Oh bloody hell! All of time and space at my fingertips and I can't find anywhere to drop my bunch.
Inside Bog Roll 3000 ...
Doc: Right Jamie. I've just remembered, there's a top notch little prodgy on Metamius 3. Quick! Set the coordinates, I've got the turtle's head.
*Whilst Bog Roll heads for its new location...*
Doc: Hurry up for fudge's sake. I think I'm touching cloth.
"Bog Roll 3000 lands on a pink outland.
Dr Poo heads out and repeats his usual running style (hat in one hand and newspaper in the other), making his way over to a secluded wooden cubical, positioned right next to a Grand Clock (which reads 2 O'clock)"
*He quickly swings open the cubical door*
Doc: The Marster. Fudge! What are you doing in there?
Marster: Sorry Doctor, but I was on the pot last night on Zapharus. Got the squirts something rotten, I think I'll be in here all day.
Doc: Barsted!
"As Doctor Poo slams the door shut, the Master lets a runny one go..."
Marster: Oooooh yeeeaaah.
"Meanwhile, the Doc makes his way back into the Voyager 3000..."
Doc: Right. Set the coordinates.. anywhere. I'm absolutely fudging desperate! We've got to find somewhere right now or I'll sheet my bloody pants! I'm chewing a fudging brick.
Jamie: Right Doctor.
After about three seconds..
Jamie: Okay, here we are Doctor.
Doc: Where?
Jamie: The planet Starro.
Doc: Well fudging done. It's only the planet of the fudging Darlics. But shy not, I need a sheet big time! Open those doors before I lay a stone of dogs eggs in my strides.
"The Door zaps open as the doctor legs it out once again"
Darlics: Halt! Halt! Intruder! Intruder! Heading for Dabrose's private sheethouse. Intruder! Intruder!
Meanwhile, in Dabros's toilet
Doc: Aaagh. At long larst. I fudging needed that.
"Suddenly, the cubical door is zapped by the darlics, leaving a massive hole and clearly showing Dr Poo stunned on the bog"
Darlics: You filthy b******d! You filthy b******d!
*Dabros appears*
Dabros: Has anyone got some tissue?
Doc: Sorry Dabros. I'll give it ten minutes if I were you.
*Theme tune plays out*
(PS: Dr Poo likes fudge)
well the Darleks (sp?) do have plungers for arms
-Best enjoyed if you put the posh voice of Prince Charles on the doctor and the voice of Frodo's pal (can't remember his name) on Jamie-
---
*Dr Who theme tune plays only this time with fart noises replacing the usual tone*
`Travelling through time and space trying to find somewhere to have a big sheet`
Dr Poo runs from the distance, clutching his newspaper under one arm and holding his hat down with another, being chased by shiny-suited creatures"
Jamie: Quick! Hurry Doctor they're gaining on ye!
Cyborgs: *mumble* No chance to escape. Your position is futile *mumble*
"After legging it a good 100 metres, Dr Poo eventually escapes the cyborgs and enters his voyager, namely 'Bog Roll 3000'"
Jamie: Did you manage to drop it Doctor?
Doc: Did I fudge. I had my shreddies down and I was aching to pile off. Next thing I knew, these bloody cybermen are coming after me.
*Jamie fiddles with some buttons in front of him*
Doc: Set the coordinates for anywhere in space with plenty of bushes Jamie.. Urr, no ice planets mind.
"Still surrounded by Cyborgs, Bog Roll 3000 sets off, making with it a squeamish sound, until it soon reaches a halt"
Jamie: I think we've found a quiet spot, Doctor. No apparent life forms, oxygen at 20%.
Doc: Fudge that. Let me out! I've got a brown trout to drop.
"Dr Poo leaves Bog Roll 3000 once again with his newspaper under one arm and his brightly coloured scarf round his neck blowing in the wind, and all he can see is a beach-like location with nothing else, but water and sand in sight"
Doc: Get in! No one to bloody mind.
*He picks a nice spot and settles down with his newspaper*
Doc: Aaagh. This is going to be fabulous. It's in the bombie.. here we go.
*Newspaper (Daily Mirror) reads: - Pamela Anderson drinks cup of tea(front cover - Gazza drinks cup of tea(back cover) with a picture of a naked woman on both sides*
Jamie: Doctor! Look out! Behind ye! Sea devils!
"Dr Poo quickly gets up and runs towards the ship, clutching his hat and newspaper once again"
Doc: Oh bloody hell! All of time and space at my fingertips and I can't find anywhere to drop my bunch.
Inside Bog Roll 3000 ...
Doc: Right Jamie. I've just remembered, there's a top notch little prodgy on Metamius 3. Quick! Set the coordinates, I've got the turtle's head.
*Whilst Bog Roll heads for its new location...*
Doc: Hurry up for fudge's sake. I think I'm touching cloth.
"Bog Roll 3000 lands on a pink outland.
Dr Poo heads out and repeats his usual running style (hat in one hand and newspaper in the other), making his way over to a secluded wooden cubical, positioned right next to a Grand Clock (which reads 2 O'clock)"
*He quickly swings open the cubical door*
Doc: The Marster. Fudge! What are you doing in there?
Marster: Sorry Doctor, but I was on the pot last night on Zapharus. Got the squirts something rotten, I think I'll be in here all day.
Doc: Barsted!
"As Doctor Poo slams the door shut, the Master lets a runny one go..."
Marster: Oooooh yeeeaaah.
"Meanwhile, the Doc makes his way back into the Voyager 3000..."
Doc: Right. Set the coordinates.. anywhere. I'm absolutely fudging desperate! We've got to find somewhere right now or I'll sheet my bloody pants! I'm chewing a fudging brick.
Jamie: Right Doctor.
After about three seconds..
Jamie: Okay, here we are Doctor.
Doc: Where?
Jamie: The planet Starro.
Doc: Well fudging done. It's only the planet of the fudging Darlics. But shy not, I need a sheet big time! Open those doors before I lay a stone of dogs eggs in my strides.
"The Door zaps open as the doctor legs it out once again"
Darlics: Halt! Halt! Intruder! Intruder! Heading for Dabrose's private sheethouse. Intruder! Intruder!
Meanwhile, in Dabros's toilet
Doc: Aaagh. At long larst. I fudging needed that.
"Suddenly, the cubical door is zapped by the darlics, leaving a massive hole and clearly showing Dr Poo stunned on the bog"
Darlics: You filthy b******d! You filthy b******d!
*Dabros appears*
Dabros: Has anyone got some tissue?
Doc: Sorry Dabros. I'll give it ten minutes if I were you.
*Theme tune plays out*
(PS: Dr Poo likes fudge)
---
*Dr Who theme tune plays only this time with fart noises replacing the usual tone*
`Travelling through time and space trying to find somewhere to have a big sheet`
Dr Poo runs from the distance, clutching his newspaper under one arm and holding his hat down with another, being chased by shiny-suited creatures"
Jamie: Quick! Hurry Doctor they're gaining on ye!
Cyborgs: *mumble* No chance to escape. Your position is futile *mumble*
"After legging it a good 100 metres, Dr Poo eventually escapes the cyborgs and enters his voyager, namely 'Bog Roll 3000'"
Jamie: Did you manage to drop it Doctor?
Doc: Did I fudge. I had my shreddies down and I was aching to pile off. Next thing I knew, these bloody cybermen are coming after me.
*Jamie fiddles with some buttons in front of him*
Doc: Set the coordinates for anywhere in space with plenty of bushes Jamie.. Urr, no ice planets mind.
"Still surrounded by Cyborgs, Bog Roll 3000 sets off, making with it a squeamish sound, until it soon reaches a halt"
Jamie: I think we've found a quiet spot, Doctor. No apparent life forms, oxygen at 20%.
Doc: Fudge that. Let me out! I've got a brown trout to drop.
"Dr Poo leaves Bog Roll 3000 once again with his newspaper under one arm and his brightly coloured scarf round his neck blowing in the wind, and all he can see is a beach-like location with nothing else, but water and sand in sight"
Doc: Get in! No one to bloody mind.
*He picks a nice spot and settles down with his newspaper*
Doc: Aaagh. This is going to be fabulous. It's in the bombie.. here we go.
*Newspaper (Daily Mirror) reads: - Pamela Anderson drinks cup of tea(front cover - Gazza drinks cup of tea(back cover) with a picture of a naked woman on both sides*
Jamie: Doctor! Look out! Behind ye! Sea devils!
"Dr Poo quickly gets up and runs towards the ship, clutching his hat and newspaper once again"
Doc: Oh bloody hell! All of time and space at my fingertips and I can't find anywhere to drop my bunch.
Inside Bog Roll 3000 ...
Doc: Right Jamie. I've just remembered, there's a top notch little prodgy on Metamius 3. Quick! Set the coordinates, I've got the turtle's head.
*Whilst Bog Roll heads for its new location...*
Doc: Hurry up for fudge's sake. I think I'm touching cloth.
"Bog Roll 3000 lands on a pink outland.
Dr Poo heads out and repeats his usual running style (hat in one hand and newspaper in the other), making his way over to a secluded wooden cubical, positioned right next to a Grand Clock (which reads 2 O'clock)"
*He quickly swings open the cubical door*
Doc: The Marster. Fudge! What are you doing in there?
Marster: Sorry Doctor, but I was on the pot last night on Zapharus. Got the squirts something rotten, I think I'll be in here all day.
Doc: Barsted!
"As Doctor Poo slams the door shut, the Master lets a runny one go..."
Marster: Oooooh yeeeaaah.
"Meanwhile, the Doc makes his way back into the Voyager 3000..."
Doc: Right. Set the coordinates.. anywhere. I'm absolutely fudging desperate! We've got to find somewhere right now or I'll sheet my bloody pants! I'm chewing a fudging brick.
Jamie: Right Doctor.
After about three seconds..
Jamie: Okay, here we are Doctor.
Doc: Where?
Jamie: The planet Starro.
Doc: Well fudging done. It's only the planet of the fudging Darlics. But shy not, I need a sheet big time! Open those doors before I lay a stone of dogs eggs in my strides.
"The Door zaps open as the doctor legs it out once again"
Darlics: Halt! Halt! Intruder! Intruder! Heading for Dabrose's private sheethouse. Intruder! Intruder!
Meanwhile, in Dabros's toilet
Doc: Aaagh. At long larst. I fudging needed that.
"Suddenly, the cubical door is zapped by the darlics, leaving a massive hole and clearly showing Dr Poo stunned on the bog"
Darlics: You filthy b******d! You filthy b******d!
*Dabros appears*
Dabros: Has anyone got some tissue?
Doc: Sorry Dabros. I'll give it ten minutes if I were you.
*Theme tune plays out*
(PS: Dr Poo likes fudge)