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You couldn’t imagine it really, could you? Probably the most misinterpreted culture on this earth, decidedly chosen to shun most forms of technology, have decided to create a console, in which will compete in the ‘Console War’.
Everyone believes than the Amish do not use electricity, and they don't have games consoles, or anything to do with technology post 1800. However if you search on the Internet for "Amish", you will find a hell-o’-a-lot of Amish web sites, they have the technology, even to create a contender for Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo.
I wanted to know so badly; I took a trip to the Amish technology resort hub located in a distant subversive dugout in Intercourse, Pennsylvania
Apparently, soon after discovering the joys of such games as ‘monopoly’ and ‘cluedo’ the townspeople have soon become tired of their repetitiveness. Because of their inherited bloodthirsty nature, somebody had to intercept, and create something so complex, it runs without electricity…
A hard job, I agree. But Jeremiah B. Gates has decided to put the ravenous mob to sleep, by creating the first ever Amish-compatible console, using only a series of chicken pulleys, a cardboard cereal box, and straw.
A somewhat sceptical reporter believes that, without electricity, the machine will be almost impossible to work. But the sophisticated pulley system, is greater than any ‘artificial’ power source, and is two times more powerful.
Apparently the pulleys operate in a similar manner to treadmills, where chickens appear to be walking, but their energy is being transferred into more useful energy. Supposedly this exercise will also help the chickens to make bigger, double yoked, King-sized eggs. Thus increasing the amount of pay to the community, the money will then be transferred to help generate, more chicken-friendly machinery. But as of now, the chickens will remain to be active 24 hours a day 7 days a week, knowing that, if they fall to sleep they will fall into a meat processor, placed directly behind them.
Despite the machines details being sketchy, it is possible for me to announce that Amish TM, have exclusitivity rights to games like Halo – Farming Evolved, Butter Churning Sunshine and Grand Good day Auto. From early screenshots, I imagine these games will be excellent; hopefully the game play will match up to the graphics.
But where did they get their money from, you cry. To be honest, I am unsure, but from research the Amish are involved in some sort of drug dealing underworld, in which animals, humans and money are exchanged.
The creator emphasises that the Amish TM are here to stay, and will eventually own every single person on this Earth. I am unsure of what Amish TM meant by the latter statement, so I ran, and squealed like a pig.
Also lined up for launch, is an online service, designed for the farmyard community. The servers will be made from straw, connected into various wires, and a horse shoe.
As a reporter, I would almost definitely say that this console will be a hit in the Amish community, and eventually Amish TM hope for world domination, which I think is inevitable, but what would this reporter know?
If Amish TM do create a masterpiece, thank me for the original input, and for the vegetable soup.
Cheers
Everyone believes than the Amish do not use electricity, and they don't have games consoles, or anything to do with technology post 1800. However if you search on the Internet for "Amish", you will find a hell-o’-a-lot of Amish web sites, they have the technology, even to create a contender for Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo.
I wanted to know so badly; I took a trip to the Amish technology resort hub located in a distant subversive dugout in Intercourse, Pennsylvania
Apparently, soon after discovering the joys of such games as ‘monopoly’ and ‘cluedo’ the townspeople have soon become tired of their repetitiveness. Because of their inherited bloodthirsty nature, somebody had to intercept, and create something so complex, it runs without electricity…
A hard job, I agree. But Jeremiah B. Gates has decided to put the ravenous mob to sleep, by creating the first ever Amish-compatible console, using only a series of chicken pulleys, a cardboard cereal box, and straw.
A somewhat sceptical reporter believes that, without electricity, the machine will be almost impossible to work. But the sophisticated pulley system, is greater than any ‘artificial’ power source, and is two times more powerful.
Apparently the pulleys operate in a similar manner to treadmills, where chickens appear to be walking, but their energy is being transferred into more useful energy. Supposedly this exercise will also help the chickens to make bigger, double yoked, King-sized eggs. Thus increasing the amount of pay to the community, the money will then be transferred to help generate, more chicken-friendly machinery. But as of now, the chickens will remain to be active 24 hours a day 7 days a week, knowing that, if they fall to sleep they will fall into a meat processor, placed directly behind them.
Despite the machines details being sketchy, it is possible for me to announce that Amish TM, have exclusitivity rights to games like Halo – Farming Evolved, Butter Churning Sunshine and Grand Good day Auto. From early screenshots, I imagine these games will be excellent; hopefully the game play will match up to the graphics.
But where did they get their money from, you cry. To be honest, I am unsure, but from research the Amish are involved in some sort of drug dealing underworld, in which animals, humans and money are exchanged.
The creator emphasises that the Amish TM are here to stay, and will eventually own every single person on this Earth. I am unsure of what Amish TM meant by the latter statement, so I ran, and squealed like a pig.
Also lined up for launch, is an online service, designed for the farmyard community. The servers will be made from straw, connected into various wires, and a horse shoe.
As a reporter, I would almost definitely say that this console will be a hit in the Amish community, and eventually Amish TM hope for world domination, which I think is inevitable, but what would this reporter know?
If Amish TM do create a masterpiece, thank me for the original input, and for the vegetable soup.
Cheers
Cheers for the feed, good lads
Another good post there Sam.
Thanks for making me aware as usual. :D
Thanks for making me aware as usual. :D
very good.
very good indeed.
kept me amused.
very good indeed.
kept me amused.
Thanks very much Azul,
For a minute there I thought I was going unoticed :D
Cheers for the comments, and the reckognition
For a minute there I thought I was going unoticed :D
Cheers for the comments, and the reckognition
Very good Sam, you really are becoming an asset to the forums, most including to the Life Forum.
Another good piece, nice one.
Another good piece, nice one.
You couldn’t imagine it really, could you? Probably the most misinterpreted culture on this earth, decidedly chosen to shun most forms of technology, have decided to create a console, in which will compete in the ‘Console War’.
Everyone believes than the Amish do not use electricity, and they don't have games consoles, or anything to do with technology post 1800. However if you search on the Internet for "Amish", you will find a hell-o’-a-lot of Amish web sites, they have the technology, even to create a contender for Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo.
I wanted to know so badly; I took a trip to the Amish technology resort hub located in a distant subversive dugout in Intercourse, Pennsylvania
Apparently, soon after discovering the joys of such games as ‘monopoly’ and ‘cluedo’ the townspeople have soon become tired of their repetitiveness. Because of their inherited bloodthirsty nature, somebody had to intercept, and create something so complex, it runs without electricity…
A hard job, I agree. But Jeremiah B. Gates has decided to put the ravenous mob to sleep, by creating the first ever Amish-compatible console, using only a series of chicken pulleys, a cardboard cereal box, and straw.
A somewhat sceptical reporter believes that, without electricity, the machine will be almost impossible to work. But the sophisticated pulley system, is greater than any ‘artificial’ power source, and is two times more powerful.
Apparently the pulleys operate in a similar manner to treadmills, where chickens appear to be walking, but their energy is being transferred into more useful energy. Supposedly this exercise will also help the chickens to make bigger, double yoked, King-sized eggs. Thus increasing the amount of pay to the community, the money will then be transferred to help generate, more chicken-friendly machinery. But as of now, the chickens will remain to be active 24 hours a day 7 days a week, knowing that, if they fall to sleep they will fall into a meat processor, placed directly behind them.
Despite the machines details being sketchy, it is possible for me to announce that Amish TM, have exclusitivity rights to games like Halo – Farming Evolved, Butter Churning Sunshine and Grand Good day Auto. From early screenshots, I imagine these games will be excellent; hopefully the game play will match up to the graphics.
But where did they get their money from, you cry. To be honest, I am unsure, but from research the Amish are involved in some sort of drug dealing underworld, in which animals, humans and money are exchanged.
The creator emphasises that the Amish TM are here to stay, and will eventually own every single person on this Earth. I am unsure of what Amish TM meant by the latter statement, so I ran, and squealed like a pig.
Also lined up for launch, is an online service, designed for the farmyard community. The servers will be made from straw, connected into various wires, and a horse shoe.
As a reporter, I would almost definitely say that this console will be a hit in the Amish community, and eventually Amish TM hope for world domination, which I think is inevitable, but what would this reporter know?
If Amish TM do create a masterpiece, thank me for the original input, and for the vegetable soup.
Cheers
Everyone believes than the Amish do not use electricity, and they don't have games consoles, or anything to do with technology post 1800. However if you search on the Internet for "Amish", you will find a hell-o’-a-lot of Amish web sites, they have the technology, even to create a contender for Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo.
I wanted to know so badly; I took a trip to the Amish technology resort hub located in a distant subversive dugout in Intercourse, Pennsylvania
Apparently, soon after discovering the joys of such games as ‘monopoly’ and ‘cluedo’ the townspeople have soon become tired of their repetitiveness. Because of their inherited bloodthirsty nature, somebody had to intercept, and create something so complex, it runs without electricity…
A hard job, I agree. But Jeremiah B. Gates has decided to put the ravenous mob to sleep, by creating the first ever Amish-compatible console, using only a series of chicken pulleys, a cardboard cereal box, and straw.
A somewhat sceptical reporter believes that, without electricity, the machine will be almost impossible to work. But the sophisticated pulley system, is greater than any ‘artificial’ power source, and is two times more powerful.
Apparently the pulleys operate in a similar manner to treadmills, where chickens appear to be walking, but their energy is being transferred into more useful energy. Supposedly this exercise will also help the chickens to make bigger, double yoked, King-sized eggs. Thus increasing the amount of pay to the community, the money will then be transferred to help generate, more chicken-friendly machinery. But as of now, the chickens will remain to be active 24 hours a day 7 days a week, knowing that, if they fall to sleep they will fall into a meat processor, placed directly behind them.
Despite the machines details being sketchy, it is possible for me to announce that Amish TM, have exclusitivity rights to games like Halo – Farming Evolved, Butter Churning Sunshine and Grand Good day Auto. From early screenshots, I imagine these games will be excellent; hopefully the game play will match up to the graphics.
But where did they get their money from, you cry. To be honest, I am unsure, but from research the Amish are involved in some sort of drug dealing underworld, in which animals, humans and money are exchanged.
The creator emphasises that the Amish TM are here to stay, and will eventually own every single person on this Earth. I am unsure of what Amish TM meant by the latter statement, so I ran, and squealed like a pig.
Also lined up for launch, is an online service, designed for the farmyard community. The servers will be made from straw, connected into various wires, and a horse shoe.
As a reporter, I would almost definitely say that this console will be a hit in the Amish community, and eventually Amish TM hope for world domination, which I think is inevitable, but what would this reporter know?
If Amish TM do create a masterpiece, thank me for the original input, and for the vegetable soup.
Cheers