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I was lying in bed last night, contemplating my retirement from the WWF forum, when I had a funny thought. What would life be like if it was like wrestling?
I mean, imagine if you were shopping in Tescos. You'd first have a 'backstage' camera bit, being interviewed by Michael Cole, Lillian Garcia, or perhaps your mum.
"Cheese, what are your plans for the upcoming match?"
"Mother, would you please SHUT THE HELL UP! What? I said SHUT THE HELL UP! I'm here to come and get some cornflakes, and thats the bottom line coz Mouldy Cheese says so!"
"Erm... OK. Just remember where you parked your limo."
"It's in 3:16."
You walk through the revolving doors, and go to the isle where your cornflakes are. You'd have JR commantating for you.
"This shopping trip is for some shaving foam and some fressi cheese, and he's currently making his way down the bread aisle! What a hellacious move! He just crashed his trolly into an old lady! She's been broken in half!"
"Oh my God, he's just been Powerbombed through the Frosties display! It looks like a train wreck!"
Over the tannoy system: We have a slobberknocker in isle 12, could David please do a run in...
"He's just been hit over the head with a steel packet of frosties!".
Or, even cooler, when you go to McDonalds and they ask you for your order, BOOM your pyros go off and you pose, before you cut a promo and ask for a Happy Meal.
The concept works even better in sport.
"What a superb goal by Ronaldo! He hit that one from 50 yards out! But wait - Brown had the referee distracted, it's been disallowed".
"And here comes Seaman to take the goal kick. England are up by a goal against Germany in the world cup final... but wait! Seaman just backheeled the ball into his own net! Heel turn! Seaman has joined the evil Germans!"
"And now here comes Beckham, dribbeling down the wing... Sean Campbell has come across to tackle him... but wait...Posh Spice distracts the referee at ringside! Beckham hits the 'Mohican Bomb' on Campbell! Beckham continues his run!"
"And now, Steven Hendry, ready to take this long pot for the World Snooker Championship. He steadys his aim... But Paul White does a run in, and takes the pot! White grabs the trophy and runs! Well, thats the 24/7 rule for you..."
Any more ideas, anyone?
I mean, imagine if you were shopping in Tescos. You'd first have a 'backstage' camera bit, being interviewed by Michael Cole, Lillian Garcia, or perhaps your mum.
"Cheese, what are your plans for the upcoming match?"
"Mother, would you please SHUT THE HELL UP! What? I said SHUT THE HELL UP! I'm here to come and get some cornflakes, and thats the bottom line coz Mouldy Cheese says so!"
"Erm... OK. Just remember where you parked your limo."
"It's in 3:16."
You walk through the revolving doors, and go to the isle where your cornflakes are. You'd have JR commantating for you.
"This shopping trip is for some shaving foam and some fressi cheese, and he's currently making his way down the bread aisle! What a hellacious move! He just crashed his trolly into an old lady! She's been broken in half!"
"Oh my God, he's just been Powerbombed through the Frosties display! It looks like a train wreck!"
Over the tannoy system: We have a slobberknocker in isle 12, could David please do a run in...
"He's just been hit over the head with a steel packet of frosties!".
Or, even cooler, when you go to McDonalds and they ask you for your order, BOOM your pyros go off and you pose, before you cut a promo and ask for a Happy Meal.
The concept works even better in sport.
"What a superb goal by Ronaldo! He hit that one from 50 yards out! But wait - Brown had the referee distracted, it's been disallowed".
"And here comes Seaman to take the goal kick. England are up by a goal against Germany in the world cup final... but wait! Seaman just backheeled the ball into his own net! Heel turn! Seaman has joined the evil Germans!"
"And now here comes Beckham, dribbeling down the wing... Sean Campbell has come across to tackle him... but wait...Posh Spice distracts the referee at ringside! Beckham hits the 'Mohican Bomb' on Campbell! Beckham continues his run!"
"And now, Steven Hendry, ready to take this long pot for the World Snooker Championship. He steadys his aim... But Paul White does a run in, and takes the pot! White grabs the trophy and runs! Well, thats the 24/7 rule for you..."
Any more ideas, anyone?
This is my least sucsessful topic ever.
LOL!! I thought about the sports as well, especially football. I might write a wrestling football match at some point (no one steal this idea or you're banned!)
You can just imagine though...
"It's Liverpool 2, Leeeds 2 and Leeds need a victory to win the championship! Owen has the ball, and wait...look, that's Van Nistelrooy!! He's just punched the ref! Here come the whole of Man Utd! They take the ball of Owen and run it straight towards Dudek's goal! They shove him out of the way, and tell Viduka to kick it in! He does, just as the ref gets up!! Goal!!"
:D
You can just imagine though...
"It's Liverpool 2, Leeeds 2 and Leeds need a victory to win the championship! Owen has the ball, and wait...look, that's Van Nistelrooy!! He's just punched the ref! Here come the whole of Man Utd! They take the ball of Owen and run it straight towards Dudek's goal! They shove him out of the way, and tell Viduka to kick it in! He does, just as the ref gets up!! Goal!!"
:D
I was lying in bed last night, contemplating my retirement from the WWF forum, when I had a funny thought. What would life be like if it was like wrestling?
I mean, imagine if you were shopping in Tescos. You'd first have a 'backstage' camera bit, being interviewed by Michael Cole, Lillian Garcia, or perhaps your mum.
"Cheese, what are your plans for the upcoming match?"
"Mother, would you please SHUT THE HELL UP! What? I said SHUT THE HELL UP! I'm here to come and get some cornflakes, and thats the bottom line coz Mouldy Cheese says so!"
"Erm... OK. Just remember where you parked your limo."
"It's in 3:16."
You walk through the revolving doors, and go to the isle where your cornflakes are. You'd have JR commantating for you.
"This shopping trip is for some shaving foam and some fressi cheese, and he's currently making his way down the bread aisle! What a hellacious move! He just crashed his trolly into an old lady! She's been broken in half!"
"Oh my God, he's just been Powerbombed through the Frosties display! It looks like a train wreck!"
Over the tannoy system: We have a slobberknocker in isle 12, could David please do a run in...
"He's just been hit over the head with a steel packet of frosties!".
Or, even cooler, when you go to McDonalds and they ask you for your order, BOOM your pyros go off and you pose, before you cut a promo and ask for a Happy Meal.
The concept works even better in sport.
"What a superb goal by Ronaldo! He hit that one from 50 yards out! But wait - Brown had the referee distracted, it's been disallowed".
"And here comes Seaman to take the goal kick. England are up by a goal against Germany in the world cup final... but wait! Seaman just backheeled the ball into his own net! Heel turn! Seaman has joined the evil Germans!"
"And now here comes Beckham, dribbeling down the wing... Sean Campbell has come across to tackle him... but wait...Posh Spice distracts the referee at ringside! Beckham hits the 'Mohican Bomb' on Campbell! Beckham continues his run!"
"And now, Steven Hendry, ready to take this long pot for the World Snooker Championship. He steadys his aim... But Paul White does a run in, and takes the pot! White grabs the trophy and runs! Well, thats the 24/7 rule for you..."
Any more ideas, anyone?
I mean, imagine if you were shopping in Tescos. You'd first have a 'backstage' camera bit, being interviewed by Michael Cole, Lillian Garcia, or perhaps your mum.
"Cheese, what are your plans for the upcoming match?"
"Mother, would you please SHUT THE HELL UP! What? I said SHUT THE HELL UP! I'm here to come and get some cornflakes, and thats the bottom line coz Mouldy Cheese says so!"
"Erm... OK. Just remember where you parked your limo."
"It's in 3:16."
You walk through the revolving doors, and go to the isle where your cornflakes are. You'd have JR commantating for you.
"This shopping trip is for some shaving foam and some fressi cheese, and he's currently making his way down the bread aisle! What a hellacious move! He just crashed his trolly into an old lady! She's been broken in half!"
"Oh my God, he's just been Powerbombed through the Frosties display! It looks like a train wreck!"
Over the tannoy system: We have a slobberknocker in isle 12, could David please do a run in...
"He's just been hit over the head with a steel packet of frosties!".
Or, even cooler, when you go to McDonalds and they ask you for your order, BOOM your pyros go off and you pose, before you cut a promo and ask for a Happy Meal.
The concept works even better in sport.
"What a superb goal by Ronaldo! He hit that one from 50 yards out! But wait - Brown had the referee distracted, it's been disallowed".
"And here comes Seaman to take the goal kick. England are up by a goal against Germany in the world cup final... but wait! Seaman just backheeled the ball into his own net! Heel turn! Seaman has joined the evil Germans!"
"And now here comes Beckham, dribbeling down the wing... Sean Campbell has come across to tackle him... but wait...Posh Spice distracts the referee at ringside! Beckham hits the 'Mohican Bomb' on Campbell! Beckham continues his run!"
"And now, Steven Hendry, ready to take this long pot for the World Snooker Championship. He steadys his aim... But Paul White does a run in, and takes the pot! White grabs the trophy and runs! Well, thats the 24/7 rule for you..."
Any more ideas, anyone?