The "Freeola Customer Forum" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
It'll be just the antidote to misery, and I think you guys will love his stuff.
Here are a few of his routines that I think are relevant today (remember this stuff was before 1992):
"Bush is calling the terrorist attacks 'Cowardly'. Well hang on a minute Bush, these guys give their lives for something, whilst we launch cruise missiles from floating iron islands 5 miles out to sea. Cowardly? Nope, these guys seriously hate us and nobody is asking why that is, trust me, this can only get worse"
"Saw a movie called Basic Instinct this year. Bill's quick capsule review? Piece of s***. That's all it is. Don't get caught up in that phony morality about lesbian sex and violence.
Did you know they removed all the lesbian sex scenes because America was turned off by them?
Boy, is my finger not on the pulse of America.
If I had my way, the only person protesting that piece of s*** would be Michael Douglas demanding his role be put back in. "I swear I was in that movie!", Hmmm, well let's see Mikey, the movie started, Sharon Stone was eating another woman for 90mins and then the credits rolled? I don't remember seeing your scrawny as(h) Mike! You made your $14 mill, so shut up and hit the road."
"First of all, with this Gulf thing, there never was a war.
How can you say that Bill? Well, a war is when *two* armies are fighting. So I think you can see right there, wasn't exactly a war.
After one month of carpet bombing and not one response, the Elite Republican Guard then became the Republican Guard. And after another month of bombing and again not one response, they went from The Elite Republican Guard, to the Republican Guard, to the Republicans made this crap up about there even being guards out there.
We hope you enjoyed your firework show, The Persian Gulf Distraction. "It was so pretty and it took our minds off domestic issues"
"And I knew we supplied them weapons man, I wondered about that. The reports at the time? "Iraq? Incredible weapons, incredible!"
How do you know? "Well,we looked at the receipt but as soon as the cheque clears we're going in. C'mon, he's a hitler and here's a foetus, let's get motivated! Got to have us an enemy. I'm sick of having enemies man, there is nobody that can pose a threat to us if we just stopped forcing our fat American face into their lives and countries. We have enough problems of our own without making them overseas.
I'm sick of arming these little countries and then going in to blow them to hell for having weapons.
We armed Kuwait. Why? Last week they had nothing but rocks man, why give them guns and then shoot them for having guns?"
> Sorry to ask, umm, fellas, but...who the hell is Bill Hicks?
If you go on to Audio Galaxy and search for "Bill Hicks" you find a lot of stuff (as you'd expect). This is how I got to know of him.
Let me check work post records, see when they sent it out.
"I'm Bill Hicks and I'm dead now"
Seriously, I've never heard of this 'funny' man.
:-s
SHOCKY
That was the funniest thing I think I've ever heard. Even more so because it all seems to make perfect sense when he says it.
It'll be just the antidote to misery, and I think you guys will love his stuff.
Here are a few of his routines that I think are relevant today (remember this stuff was before 1992):
"Bush is calling the terrorist attacks 'Cowardly'. Well hang on a minute Bush, these guys give their lives for something, whilst we launch cruise missiles from floating iron islands 5 miles out to sea. Cowardly? Nope, these guys seriously hate us and nobody is asking why that is, trust me, this can only get worse"
"Saw a movie called Basic Instinct this year. Bill's quick capsule review? Piece of s***. That's all it is. Don't get caught up in that phony morality about lesbian sex and violence.
Did you know they removed all the lesbian sex scenes because America was turned off by them?
Boy, is my finger not on the pulse of America.
If I had my way, the only person protesting that piece of s*** would be Michael Douglas demanding his role be put back in. "I swear I was in that movie!", Hmmm, well let's see Mikey, the movie started, Sharon Stone was eating another woman for 90mins and then the credits rolled? I don't remember seeing your scrawny as(h) Mike! You made your $14 mill, so shut up and hit the road."
"First of all, with this Gulf thing, there never was a war.
How can you say that Bill? Well, a war is when *two* armies are fighting. So I think you can see right there, wasn't exactly a war.
After one month of carpet bombing and not one response, the Elite Republican Guard then became the Republican Guard. And after another month of bombing and again not one response, they went from The Elite Republican Guard, to the Republican Guard, to the Republicans made this crap up about there even being guards out there.
We hope you enjoyed your firework show, The Persian Gulf Distraction. "It was so pretty and it took our minds off domestic issues"
"And I knew we supplied them weapons man, I wondered about that. The reports at the time? "Iraq? Incredible weapons, incredible!"
How do you know? "Well,we looked at the receipt but as soon as the cheque clears we're going in. C'mon, he's a hitler and here's a foetus, let's get motivated! Got to have us an enemy. I'm sick of having enemies man, there is nobody that can pose a threat to us if we just stopped forcing our fat American face into their lives and countries. We have enough problems of our own without making them overseas.
I'm sick of arming these little countries and then going in to blow them to hell for having weapons.
We armed Kuwait. Why? Last week they had nothing but rocks man, why give them guns and then shoot them for having guns?"