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Well you said we could so I am. I'm posting the first story in a long time around this forum and here it is:
The Naked Man (true story)
My family and myself were all gathered around the dog, which was wearing his transparent, plastic lampshade, after he had eaten his lavish dog food. It was only lavish because it was fish and rice, which is heavenly food to a dog. After his operation he was treated like a King. The operation had only come about when he had met a plastic doll.
With my father and my dog, we were walking around the local field nick named "Burnt Log". This field had this name because a couple of years earlier it had a huge, smouldered log. If you were to stand on this log you could see the house's blue garage. But the log was long gone now and as we passed the spot where it had once lay, we noticed a small expressionless face in-bedded in tangled grass. My dog went about his daily business, sticking his nose into the weeds and the occasional prickly one, then he saw it, the same emotionless face, staring back at him. He immediately stuck his whiskery snout into the little man's face. He battered him around a bit, exposing the fact that he wasn’t wearing any clothes. After this small play with the doll, he picked it up in his tight grip of his teeth and began to take him home, with a small quiet satisfaction on his face.
He actually managed to transport the naked, Chinese, man all the way home, usually if this hadn't been an item he cherished it would have been left in the field.
My father and myself had thought that this is what had happened, but it wasn’t. Some how my dog managed to smuggle the little doll into the house with out us knowing. As a strict rule for my dog all his toys were to be taken away from him, just in case the following thing would ever happen.
The next morning my mother had come down to find my dog in the kitchen with body parts. There were body parts, but no head, some where there was a decapitated head. The small plastic body parts of the Chinese man were spewed across the floor, they were disposed of immediately into the bin. But the head was still severed some where. My dog was quite happy with what he had accomplished and carried on with his daily routine.
A whole day went past without report on the missing head. If a dog could have looked pale I am sure my dog would have looked green. He wasn’t well at all, he lost his energetic spark because he couldn’t eat.
He did manage to get some food down, but it didn’t stay down, it was thrown across the yard in a un-describable mixture of multi-coloured liquid. It wasn’t pleasant especially for the my father who had the nasty job of clearing it up.
“Poor dog,” my mother said concerned.
“Poor dog?” inquired my father, “What about me?”
“Never mind that, I blame that little naked Chinese man!” mother said not realising how silly this sounded, “He will have to go to the vets.”
My dog was taken as soon as possible to the vets, where he was examined by an Australian vet called Greg. As soon as we had entered his tidy green room we were hit by a wave of dental smells, but we were in a vet’s room.
“What's up with this fella then?” his hands feeling the dogs stomach, “There is definitely something in his stomach, this would explain the illness,” he continued, “Well what I would like to do is,” he paused briefly, “is to get this fell into x-ray to see what's going on.”
Later that day we received a phone call saying that my dog will need surgery and they had seen an object twisted in his stomach.
The next day my dog was under the knife which was in the sturdy hand of Greg. My dog was peaceful because he was under the influence of the gas. Surgery was soon well under way and it was going to be completed soon. Soon Greg had got to the troubled area of the stomach. And there in bedded, not in weeds and roots this time, but in blood and twisted stomach, was the same expressionless face, which was once in the field. What a journey.
Suddenly Greg said, “Core blimey mate!” as his eyes had found the face.
The Chinese man’s head was erected immediately from my dog’s stomach and sealed in a jar. The man’s journey was finally over and he had done all the damage he was ever going to do.
So this is how my dog ended up with a luxury meal in front of him, all because of his addiction to eat dolls. Under the advice of Greg he was to stay on soft foods for a few days. Soft foods, such as: rice and fish.
***
Comments are welcome.
The Naked Man (true story)
My family and myself were all gathered around the dog, which was wearing his transparent, plastic lampshade, after he had eaten his lavish dog food. It was only lavish because it was fish and rice, which is heavenly food to a dog. After his operation he was treated like a King. The operation had only come about when he had met a plastic doll.
With my father and my dog, we were walking around the local field nick named "Burnt Log". This field had this name because a couple of years earlier it had a huge, smouldered log. If you were to stand on this log you could see the house's blue garage. But the log was long gone now and as we passed the spot where it had once lay, we noticed a small expressionless face in-bedded in tangled grass. My dog went about his daily business, sticking his nose into the weeds and the occasional prickly one, then he saw it, the same emotionless face, staring back at him. He immediately stuck his whiskery snout into the little man's face. He battered him around a bit, exposing the fact that he wasn’t wearing any clothes. After this small play with the doll, he picked it up in his tight grip of his teeth and began to take him home, with a small quiet satisfaction on his face.
He actually managed to transport the naked, Chinese, man all the way home, usually if this hadn't been an item he cherished it would have been left in the field.
My father and myself had thought that this is what had happened, but it wasn’t. Some how my dog managed to smuggle the little doll into the house with out us knowing. As a strict rule for my dog all his toys were to be taken away from him, just in case the following thing would ever happen.
The next morning my mother had come down to find my dog in the kitchen with body parts. There were body parts, but no head, some where there was a decapitated head. The small plastic body parts of the Chinese man were spewed across the floor, they were disposed of immediately into the bin. But the head was still severed some where. My dog was quite happy with what he had accomplished and carried on with his daily routine.
A whole day went past without report on the missing head. If a dog could have looked pale I am sure my dog would have looked green. He wasn’t well at all, he lost his energetic spark because he couldn’t eat.
He did manage to get some food down, but it didn’t stay down, it was thrown across the yard in a un-describable mixture of multi-coloured liquid. It wasn’t pleasant especially for the my father who had the nasty job of clearing it up.
“Poor dog,” my mother said concerned.
“Poor dog?” inquired my father, “What about me?”
“Never mind that, I blame that little naked Chinese man!” mother said not realising how silly this sounded, “He will have to go to the vets.”
My dog was taken as soon as possible to the vets, where he was examined by an Australian vet called Greg. As soon as we had entered his tidy green room we were hit by a wave of dental smells, but we were in a vet’s room.
“What's up with this fella then?” his hands feeling the dogs stomach, “There is definitely something in his stomach, this would explain the illness,” he continued, “Well what I would like to do is,” he paused briefly, “is to get this fell into x-ray to see what's going on.”
Later that day we received a phone call saying that my dog will need surgery and they had seen an object twisted in his stomach.
The next day my dog was under the knife which was in the sturdy hand of Greg. My dog was peaceful because he was under the influence of the gas. Surgery was soon well under way and it was going to be completed soon. Soon Greg had got to the troubled area of the stomach. And there in bedded, not in weeds and roots this time, but in blood and twisted stomach, was the same expressionless face, which was once in the field. What a journey.
Suddenly Greg said, “Core blimey mate!” as his eyes had found the face.
The Chinese man’s head was erected immediately from my dog’s stomach and sealed in a jar. The man’s journey was finally over and he had done all the damage he was ever going to do.
So this is how my dog ended up with a luxury meal in front of him, all because of his addiction to eat dolls. Under the advice of Greg he was to stay on soft foods for a few days. Soft foods, such as: rice and fish.
***
Comments are welcome.
Hunt the teacher down with a board with a pin in it!
Thats what i thought, maybe i will have a draft version of it somewhere, pity i never used the computer... i'm just trying to think if we actually got our coursework folders back before our gcse's.... hmmmm
]-[ØM€® B€€® §ØL!D ™ wrote:
> Silën† Thundêr ™ wrote:
> Quazi wrote:
>
> Didn't really see the point of it....
>
> It was just something which happened to me in my life and we had to
> write something English about something like it, so I wrote this. I
> got a high mark for it so I decided to put it here.
>
> I wrote some great stories in English, and the one i was particularly
> proud of i never got back...
lol Probably a teacher stole it and claimed it as his!
> Silën† Thundêr ™ wrote:
> Quazi wrote:
>
> Didn't really see the point of it....
>
> It was just something which happened to me in my life and we had to
> write something English about something like it, so I wrote this. I
> got a high mark for it so I decided to put it here.
>
> I wrote some great stories in English, and the one i was particularly
> proud of i never got back...
lol Probably a teacher stole it and claimed it as his!
Silën† Thundêr ™ wrote:
> Quazi wrote:
>
> Didn't really see the point of it....
>
> It was just something which happened to me in my life and we had to
> write something English about something like it, so I wrote this. I
> got a high mark for it so I decided to put it here.
I wrote some great stories in English, and the one i was particularly proud of i never got back...
> Quazi wrote:
>
> Didn't really see the point of it....
>
> It was just something which happened to me in my life and we had to
> write something English about something like it, so I wrote this. I
> got a high mark for it so I decided to put it here.
I wrote some great stories in English, and the one i was particularly proud of i never got back...
Quazi wrote:
>
> Didn't really see the point of it....
It was just something which happened to me in my life and we had to write something English about something like it, so I wrote this. I got a high mark for it so I decided to put it here.
>
> Didn't really see the point of it....
It was just something which happened to me in my life and we had to write something English about something like it, so I wrote this. I got a high mark for it so I decided to put it here.
Silën† Thundêr ™ wrote:
> Hmm.. maybe I should sorry, did you like it anyway?
Didn't really see the point of it....
> Hmm.. maybe I should sorry, did you like it anyway?
Didn't really see the point of it....
Hmm.. maybe I should sorry, did you like it anyway?
You have posted this before, but you called it:
'The Naked Chinese Man'
This should have been a sequel called:
'The Naked Welsh Man Called Fred'
'The Naked Chinese Man'
This should have been a sequel called:
'The Naked Welsh Man Called Fred'
*silence*
Well you said we could so I am. I'm posting the first story in a long time around this forum and here it is:
The Naked Man (true story)
My family and myself were all gathered around the dog, which was wearing his transparent, plastic lampshade, after he had eaten his lavish dog food. It was only lavish because it was fish and rice, which is heavenly food to a dog. After his operation he was treated like a King. The operation had only come about when he had met a plastic doll.
With my father and my dog, we were walking around the local field nick named "Burnt Log". This field had this name because a couple of years earlier it had a huge, smouldered log. If you were to stand on this log you could see the house's blue garage. But the log was long gone now and as we passed the spot where it had once lay, we noticed a small expressionless face in-bedded in tangled grass. My dog went about his daily business, sticking his nose into the weeds and the occasional prickly one, then he saw it, the same emotionless face, staring back at him. He immediately stuck his whiskery snout into the little man's face. He battered him around a bit, exposing the fact that he wasn’t wearing any clothes. After this small play with the doll, he picked it up in his tight grip of his teeth and began to take him home, with a small quiet satisfaction on his face.
He actually managed to transport the naked, Chinese, man all the way home, usually if this hadn't been an item he cherished it would have been left in the field.
My father and myself had thought that this is what had happened, but it wasn’t. Some how my dog managed to smuggle the little doll into the house with out us knowing. As a strict rule for my dog all his toys were to be taken away from him, just in case the following thing would ever happen.
The next morning my mother had come down to find my dog in the kitchen with body parts. There were body parts, but no head, some where there was a decapitated head. The small plastic body parts of the Chinese man were spewed across the floor, they were disposed of immediately into the bin. But the head was still severed some where. My dog was quite happy with what he had accomplished and carried on with his daily routine.
A whole day went past without report on the missing head. If a dog could have looked pale I am sure my dog would have looked green. He wasn’t well at all, he lost his energetic spark because he couldn’t eat.
He did manage to get some food down, but it didn’t stay down, it was thrown across the yard in a un-describable mixture of multi-coloured liquid. It wasn’t pleasant especially for the my father who had the nasty job of clearing it up.
“Poor dog,” my mother said concerned.
“Poor dog?” inquired my father, “What about me?”
“Never mind that, I blame that little naked Chinese man!” mother said not realising how silly this sounded, “He will have to go to the vets.”
My dog was taken as soon as possible to the vets, where he was examined by an Australian vet called Greg. As soon as we had entered his tidy green room we were hit by a wave of dental smells, but we were in a vet’s room.
“What's up with this fella then?” his hands feeling the dogs stomach, “There is definitely something in his stomach, this would explain the illness,” he continued, “Well what I would like to do is,” he paused briefly, “is to get this fell into x-ray to see what's going on.”
Later that day we received a phone call saying that my dog will need surgery and they had seen an object twisted in his stomach.
The next day my dog was under the knife which was in the sturdy hand of Greg. My dog was peaceful because he was under the influence of the gas. Surgery was soon well under way and it was going to be completed soon. Soon Greg had got to the troubled area of the stomach. And there in bedded, not in weeds and roots this time, but in blood and twisted stomach, was the same expressionless face, which was once in the field. What a journey.
Suddenly Greg said, “Core blimey mate!” as his eyes had found the face.
The Chinese man’s head was erected immediately from my dog’s stomach and sealed in a jar. The man’s journey was finally over and he had done all the damage he was ever going to do.
So this is how my dog ended up with a luxury meal in front of him, all because of his addiction to eat dolls. Under the advice of Greg he was to stay on soft foods for a few days. Soft foods, such as: rice and fish.
***
Comments are welcome.
The Naked Man (true story)
My family and myself were all gathered around the dog, which was wearing his transparent, plastic lampshade, after he had eaten his lavish dog food. It was only lavish because it was fish and rice, which is heavenly food to a dog. After his operation he was treated like a King. The operation had only come about when he had met a plastic doll.
With my father and my dog, we were walking around the local field nick named "Burnt Log". This field had this name because a couple of years earlier it had a huge, smouldered log. If you were to stand on this log you could see the house's blue garage. But the log was long gone now and as we passed the spot where it had once lay, we noticed a small expressionless face in-bedded in tangled grass. My dog went about his daily business, sticking his nose into the weeds and the occasional prickly one, then he saw it, the same emotionless face, staring back at him. He immediately stuck his whiskery snout into the little man's face. He battered him around a bit, exposing the fact that he wasn’t wearing any clothes. After this small play with the doll, he picked it up in his tight grip of his teeth and began to take him home, with a small quiet satisfaction on his face.
He actually managed to transport the naked, Chinese, man all the way home, usually if this hadn't been an item he cherished it would have been left in the field.
My father and myself had thought that this is what had happened, but it wasn’t. Some how my dog managed to smuggle the little doll into the house with out us knowing. As a strict rule for my dog all his toys were to be taken away from him, just in case the following thing would ever happen.
The next morning my mother had come down to find my dog in the kitchen with body parts. There were body parts, but no head, some where there was a decapitated head. The small plastic body parts of the Chinese man were spewed across the floor, they were disposed of immediately into the bin. But the head was still severed some where. My dog was quite happy with what he had accomplished and carried on with his daily routine.
A whole day went past without report on the missing head. If a dog could have looked pale I am sure my dog would have looked green. He wasn’t well at all, he lost his energetic spark because he couldn’t eat.
He did manage to get some food down, but it didn’t stay down, it was thrown across the yard in a un-describable mixture of multi-coloured liquid. It wasn’t pleasant especially for the my father who had the nasty job of clearing it up.
“Poor dog,” my mother said concerned.
“Poor dog?” inquired my father, “What about me?”
“Never mind that, I blame that little naked Chinese man!” mother said not realising how silly this sounded, “He will have to go to the vets.”
My dog was taken as soon as possible to the vets, where he was examined by an Australian vet called Greg. As soon as we had entered his tidy green room we were hit by a wave of dental smells, but we were in a vet’s room.
“What's up with this fella then?” his hands feeling the dogs stomach, “There is definitely something in his stomach, this would explain the illness,” he continued, “Well what I would like to do is,” he paused briefly, “is to get this fell into x-ray to see what's going on.”
Later that day we received a phone call saying that my dog will need surgery and they had seen an object twisted in his stomach.
The next day my dog was under the knife which was in the sturdy hand of Greg. My dog was peaceful because he was under the influence of the gas. Surgery was soon well under way and it was going to be completed soon. Soon Greg had got to the troubled area of the stomach. And there in bedded, not in weeds and roots this time, but in blood and twisted stomach, was the same expressionless face, which was once in the field. What a journey.
Suddenly Greg said, “Core blimey mate!” as his eyes had found the face.
The Chinese man’s head was erected immediately from my dog’s stomach and sealed in a jar. The man’s journey was finally over and he had done all the damage he was ever going to do.
So this is how my dog ended up with a luxury meal in front of him, all because of his addiction to eat dolls. Under the advice of Greg he was to stay on soft foods for a few days. Soft foods, such as: rice and fish.
***
Comments are welcome.