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"Console Wh0res"

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Thu 16/08/01 at 21:06
Regular
Posts: 787
The seven marched to the glow of the doors,
Of the brothel homing the console wh0res.
Although they could all garauntee they'd have fun,
Each of the seven had a favourite one.
And on the way to the sacred nest,
They liked to argue over which one was best.

Ant started with a word or two,
about his choice - Miss PS2.

"She's the prettiest and strongest of the lot.
I can't believe you don't find her hot!"

"She's not matured yet," FM said.
"She charges too much and has too big a head."

Grix agreed, "She has lots to learn,
And what she gives leaves lots to yearn."

Ant retorted, "She charges too much?
Miss N64 isn't cheap as such.
What's more she's getting far too old.
She's more like a mum for kids" Ant told.

"Don't be silly." Meka said.
"She's by far the best at taking four to bed.
Er-no, Sniper, Grix and I,
Split the cost for the cheapest ride."

"She easily manages four in one go."
Said Sniper followed by Er-no.
"You might prefer yours one on one,
But with you mates it's much more fun!"

Sheepy, FM and Ant stared in shock.
How could four men to one girl possibly rock?

Sheepy inquired, "What about Miss GBA?"
Grix shook his head. "Not today.
At the brothel Miss N64's best.
That's when Miss GBA gets her rest."

"She might play old fashioned," Said Er-no behind.
"But she'll do her job anywhere, there's no place she'll mind.
She runs out of energy every now and then,
But come well equipt and there'll be no problem."

"How about you?" They looked to FM.
"I'll be taking Miss Dreamcast again.
No one seems to realise she's the best of the lot.
She's run so low on business that she'll soon lose her job!
She's young yet experienced and knows lots of tricks,
Like Miss 64 she can take on four d***s.
Miss PS2 is four times the price
When little Miss Dreamcast is easily as nice."

"It's anyones guess, the choice of Sheepy."
Sniper laughed. "It's old Miss PC.
She's had operations and implants billions of times.
She'd look ancient otherwise."

"What do you see in he Sheepy?" asked Grix.
"She sometimes breaks down and is a nightmare to fix!"

"She's still the best!" Sheepy replied.
"Who cares if she's a little bit modified!
She works just fine if you treat her right,
And she's not just pretty, she's also bright!
She can do things that the others can only dream!"
"She's not human" said Meka "She's more a machine!"

"The ho's themselves don't care who's best."
Ant suggested, "Lets give it a rest."

FM grinned as he thought of the wh0res.
"They behave in public but behing closed doors..."

They finally reached the house of sin.
They knocked and Tony let them in.
He called the girls from out of their lairs,
And sold them to customers who took them upstairs.

"Hope your robot doesn't break over there!"
"Enjoy your mummy teaching you how to share!"
"Make the most of your closing sale!"
"I know you've been ripped off but try not to wail!"

All of the rooms then closed their doors,
As the customers went to play with their console wh0res.
Sun 26/08/01 at 15:44
Regular
Posts: 9,848
Well no ones found it offensive yet...
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:38
Regular
"IT'S ALIVE!!"
Posts: 4,741
it's not rude at all, it's really clever, and it's a nice change, Strafex isn't a normal lad, if it's offensive to you, lighten up a little.
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:37
Regular
"Oi you- sort it out"
Posts: 2,969
Hey I don't find that rude at all, and it is about videogames...kinda.

But some people arn't layed back as us and COULD find it offensive. Im just saying, ya know.
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:32
Posts: 0
Thats great! Really funny and clever! Cool!
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:28
Regular
Posts: 9,848
You won't find it rude unless you're old enough to cope with it.

Besides, it's not THAT bad...
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:25
Regular
"Oi you- sort it out"
Posts: 2,969
But I have heard Tony say tis is a family site and anything rude is not permitted.
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:21
Regular
Posts: 9,848
I think that Ali only deletes things that offend people.

If I called someone a wh0re then deletion would be neccessary.
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:16
Regular
"Oi you- sort it out"
Posts: 2,969
LOL That was one of the funniest posts i've read in days!

I'm quite surprised it hasn't been deleted tho.
Sat 25/08/01 at 22:03
Regular
"IT'S ALIVE!!"
Posts: 4,741
pop
Sat 18/08/01 at 17:16
Regular
Posts: 9,848
I spent so long writing this that I'm going to POP it.

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