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Lead By Example
The game is set as a parody of shooters, from Wolfenstein through to modern day classics, but it also lampoons action heroes in general and seems to have particular beef with the 80’s.
Matt Hazzard, the hero of the title, is a game character ‘actor’ who has appeared in a series of classic (fictional) games during the 80’s and 90's. However, his glory days are long gone after a dodgy decision to go into games like Kart Racing and a super soaker game called Soak Em (say it out loud to get the joke, yes, it’s that funny). The software company that made his games has been taken over by Marathon Megasoft (a reference to Bungie perhaps?) and Matt finds himself being cast in a new shooter.
Lead to the Slaughter
Playing as Matt, you soon find that not everything is as it seems. Someone’s actually out for your blood and it’s not just the game’s generic bad guys. Arnie alikes and a cortana style holographic helper soon turn up, but the jokes don’t really get more sophisticated than this.
This is one of the game’s big problems, for a parody it’s not all that good and tends to drift into exactly the style of game it tries to parody. The one liners are funny the first time you hear them but after a while you’ll start to wish for on screen hands to strangle Matt and his ‘Hazzard Time’ catchphrase. No amount of tongue-in-cheek excuses can make up for the voice acting being so tiresome and the jokes just getting lamer as you make your way through generic fighter after generic fighter.
Lead Lined Graphics
The graphics aren’t bad but they’re nothing to set your screen alight either, the enemies are stupid beyond belief at times. Crouch down and shoot them and they just move nearer to give you a better shot. Only the (annoying) sniper comes close to a challenge. To its merit, the game includes a cover system (and makes a joke about it, naturally) but even this feels hastily put together, like someone trying to implement a cover system by being told how one is supposed to work but never having played a game that actually uses it.
Loading screens take forever and even the ‘facts’ that pop up to make them more interesting are recycled over and over again. It would be bearable if they were actually funny.
Easily Lead
In its defence, Eat Lead isn’t a bad shooter as such, it’s just very generic, which is ironic considering what it’s supposed to be parodying. For the £5 asking fee that many places are selling the game for it’s worth a play through if only to increase your gamerscore, but I admit I didn’t see it through to the end as I was worried about losing the will to live before I’d see the end credits.
Lead Balloon
While the developers get some praise for trying something different, nothing can prevent Eat Lead from being bland and un-impressive. Maybe the title is fitting though, Lead can lead to Brain damage and at times this game feels like it’s trying to do the same.
3/10
HM, I know what you mean. I personally look at games that have been reviewed with poor scores, and think to myself "surely there's more enjoyment in the game than they're letting on". I like to give games that chance and the rental services allow me to do so.
See, it's the same reason why I played through Terminator Salvation to review it, and I did see the positive aspects to the game, it's just that the game was marred by such massive flaws and a lack of imagination. It seems quite a few of the next-gen games still fall to this.
But nice review and loving the "lead" jokes in your paragraph headers. They certainly didn't go down like a "lead balloon"
Lead By Example
The game is set as a parody of shooters, from Wolfenstein through to modern day classics, but it also lampoons action heroes in general and seems to have particular beef with the 80’s.
Matt Hazzard, the hero of the title, is a game character ‘actor’ who has appeared in a series of classic (fictional) games during the 80’s and 90's. However, his glory days are long gone after a dodgy decision to go into games like Kart Racing and a super soaker game called Soak Em (say it out loud to get the joke, yes, it’s that funny). The software company that made his games has been taken over by Marathon Megasoft (a reference to Bungie perhaps?) and Matt finds himself being cast in a new shooter.
Lead to the Slaughter
Playing as Matt, you soon find that not everything is as it seems. Someone’s actually out for your blood and it’s not just the game’s generic bad guys. Arnie alikes and a cortana style holographic helper soon turn up, but the jokes don’t really get more sophisticated than this.
This is one of the game’s big problems, for a parody it’s not all that good and tends to drift into exactly the style of game it tries to parody. The one liners are funny the first time you hear them but after a while you’ll start to wish for on screen hands to strangle Matt and his ‘Hazzard Time’ catchphrase. No amount of tongue-in-cheek excuses can make up for the voice acting being so tiresome and the jokes just getting lamer as you make your way through generic fighter after generic fighter.
Lead Lined Graphics
The graphics aren’t bad but they’re nothing to set your screen alight either, the enemies are stupid beyond belief at times. Crouch down and shoot them and they just move nearer to give you a better shot. Only the (annoying) sniper comes close to a challenge. To its merit, the game includes a cover system (and makes a joke about it, naturally) but even this feels hastily put together, like someone trying to implement a cover system by being told how one is supposed to work but never having played a game that actually uses it.
Loading screens take forever and even the ‘facts’ that pop up to make them more interesting are recycled over and over again. It would be bearable if they were actually funny.
Easily Lead
In its defence, Eat Lead isn’t a bad shooter as such, it’s just very generic, which is ironic considering what it’s supposed to be parodying. For the £5 asking fee that many places are selling the game for it’s worth a play through if only to increase your gamerscore, but I admit I didn’t see it through to the end as I was worried about losing the will to live before I’d see the end credits.
Lead Balloon
While the developers get some praise for trying something different, nothing can prevent Eat Lead from being bland and un-impressive. Maybe the title is fitting though, Lead can lead to Brain damage and at times this game feels like it’s trying to do the same.
3/10