Viewing Thread:
"Disability."

Ok, what I want to know is:

If your wife/girlfriend was pregnant, and you had a routine scan, but it turned out that the unborn baby would be disabled for life, seriously disabled (I ca't think of a name right now), would you still want the kid?

I personally think no, but in if I was in hat situation I would probably think different.

I don't want people to be offended by this, I'm genuinly curious as to what people would do.

Also, if you've got a friend or family memeber in the same situation, what did they do?

I imagine having a disabled kid would entail so much more work and effort, but would you get more pleasure from seeing him/her do things?

It would be a hard decision, but much harder for the mother. I know that’s being a little sexist, but the bond between is mother and an unborn child, in my opinion anyway, would be stronger for obvious reasons.

It’s a choice I hope never to have to make and in all honesty I’m not sure what I would do in that situation. The whole topic of abortion is controversial with arguments varying from where each individual thinks the life of a child begins.

Straying off topic slightly, I’ll get back. It would depend on how serious the disability would be. If the child would be able to live a perfectly happy life, maybe just hindered slightly, then I think I would keep the child. But if it were a more serious disability that would effect it’s quality of life badly then I think I wouldn’t keep it. I say think here, because I don’t think anyone can know until they’re in that situation. There would also be the feeling of guilt, after terminating, because in a way you’d have taken a child’s life by speculation on what you think their life might be like after their born..
Basically, I have no idea. It would be a terrible choice that I wish no-one had to make.

I have two children, so this thought has occured to me, and I have discussed it with my wife. We wouldn't have wanted a disabled child. Especially the second one, as it would have seriously affected the older childs standard of living.

Fortunatley we have two healthy children, but even having those, I don't know what would have happened if one of them had of been disabled, as I was never in the situation, so I can't really imagine what I'd do.

I think unless you are in this situation, it's foolish to speculate because you just have no idea.

When it comes to the issue of abortion I am always very wary because of the magnitude such an act has on the of life that for so many is taken for granted but valued most highly. I think in a situation where deciding wether to abort a child over disabilities you should put yourself into the position of the child. Imagine that it was you in the womb and you had say Down Syndrom. Would choose not to live knowing that you had a disability that would impair your life or would you not want to experience that life for what it is. I think to opt out of the greatest thing in existence would be impossible for any unborn child. Even if they were to experience life for a second it must be better than never.
Unfortunatly an unborn child cannot make these decisions. There fate is left in the hands of people like you and me. I'm not condeming those who have abortions on grounds of disability because as a human I can all too easily see the plight that they are in. But if we can overcome the ordeals and believe that life is really important and a human right then i believe we should give the life to that Down Syndrome child.
we talk about the right to life in terms of the unborn child but ofcourse the parents are facing a life changing decision. Yes their quality of life may diminish, they may not feel they can offer the love and time required and there may be issues to with other children in the family. So obviously the isue is complicated with leaves me with a deep impression of saddness for all who have to go through such an alldeal and so I respect peoples decisions that are not taken lightly. There are other options that I would consider however such as foster care and adoption. If the parent can't provide the care and then others can do their best and give the child hope. I know a young Down Syndrome child and the joy that she gives her parents and those she meets is immense. Normal doesn't nessaserily mean best. everyone has something to offer no matter how small. what seems insignificant to some can seem vast to others, a disabled child taking their first struggled steps for example.
The point that I would make is that life is porecious life is valuable, life is an entitlement and life is relative.

I know aof a little boy called Jack. He has a mussule destroying disease (I am not sure if his mum knew he had it).

My point is that he has had a wonderful life. I have helped him work on Computers which he really enjoys and he goes on all the school trips. He probably won't live to 10 but has experianced more in the past few years then I did when I was 15. He's bubly and great to be arround.

I think I would not destroy the unborn child as it could have a happy if not normal life and thats what lifes about, being happy.

No one that has ever had to make that choice cannot say what they would do.

Say if u had been trying for a baby for a long time, and you were in your late 30's, the decision would be very hard because it probably would be your last chance to have a baby that would probably be the hardest decision of your life.

And i hope to God that i will never have to go through that in my life.

I hope I'm never in that situation either.

It must be a terrible choice to make.

I can imagine that this would have to be one of the hardest choices anybody would have to make. To terminate an unwanted pregnancy is one thing, but to do the same when a couple have been trying for kids and want one, that must be a nightmare.

I seriously hope I'm never in that position.

Thats what I was thinking. When you're not in the situation, you probably think:

Well, it would be a lot of effort and a lot of money and the kid wouldn't have much of a life.

But when you're there, in the situation, I think it would be hard to make any choice other than to keep it.

Obviously you're right, it would have to be a joint decision, there's no way just one of you could make a choice like that.

I think this is one of those situations that you might change your mind about if you are actually in it.

At the moment I would say that I wouldn't want to keep the baby, though it would have to be a joint thing with your partner. But to actually be in the position may well change a persons mind, I've seen it happen.