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"I have just done a big fat turnip fart from my butt."

All of a sudden, I bent over and there it was.

A new Special Reserve Superstore had opened.

I felt great.

There I was - on a cold Sunday morning.

Jiving through the streets of London with my knees bending in the air like Rumplestiltskin, as saliva dripped vigorously from my mouth in pure excitement.

My gay hairy legs looked so fetching as I jived around the streets of London being really hip.

I was setting new trends.

I was being trendy.

I was living life to the full.

I was living La Vida Loca.

I was doing the play.com strut.

I was advertising play.com live and exclusive from the Special Reserve car park dressed only in my light blue long johns and 1991 Gary Lineker tracksuit top.

I was living the dream.

I was dancing for my life.

I was trying my utmost to join a boy band.

I was being just like Ice Cube.

More importantly, I was contributing.

Until, it went pair shaped.

I then fell to the floor and started to twitch violently, whilst shouting "Will someone remove the Special Reserve General Manager from my backside - I'm creating no more Special Reserve Superstores today!"

That was when it hit home.

Special Reserve was no more.

So I farted and went to get a wimpy, before nodding enthusiastically at finally becoming Ice Cube.

cookie monster wrote:
> I would rather be swaddled by a fecal stained rag than read that
> drivel again. Stfu and get out if you hate it so much.

Glad I read your post first then, I won't bother reading that plonkers :D

I would rather be swaddled by a fecal stained rag than read that drivel again. Stfu and get out if you hate it so much.

All of a sudden, I bent over and there it was.

A new Special Reserve Superstore had opened.

I felt great.

There I was - on a cold Sunday morning.

Jiving through the streets of London with my knees bending in the air like Rumplestiltskin, as saliva dripped vigorously from my mouth in pure excitement.

My gay hairy legs looked so fetching as I jived around the streets of London being really hip.

I was setting new trends.

I was being trendy.

I was living life to the full.

I was living La Vida Loca.

I was doing the play.com strut.

I was advertising play.com live and exclusive from the Special Reserve car park dressed only in my light blue long johns and 1991 Gary Lineker tracksuit top.

I was living the dream.

I was dancing for my life.

I was trying my utmost to join a boy band.

I was being just like Ice Cube.

More importantly, I was contributing.

Until, it went pair shaped.

I then fell to the floor and started to twitch violently, whilst shouting "Will someone remove the Special Reserve General Manager from my backside - I'm creating no more Special Reserve Superstores today!"

That was when it hit home.

Special Reserve was no more.

So I farted and went to get a wimpy, before nodding enthusiastically at finally becoming Ice Cube.