GetDotted Domains

Viewing Thread:
"SSC33: A Sunset Across The Waves"

The "Creative Writing" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.

Fri 07/10/05 at 12:46
Regular
Posts: 16,548
I sat hunched up on the coral white beach, staring out into the sunset. There are few things more beautiful in this world than an unspoilt sunset across water of the finest turquoise. The rich red and yellow rays seem to engulf everything around them in a vain attempt to hold onto the world - clouds, sky, the waves. But it's a futile effort, and one it is destined to always lose. It's a glorious struggle, believe me.

The reason I was here, on this beach, was that I thought I'd come to the end of my journey. It had been a long journey, in distance as well as time. It had taken it's toll. Oh, yes...there was a price to pay for what I was about to accomplish. But isn't there always? I could tell you such stories; of the deep ocean canyons out West that no man but me has seen, of the burning sands of the Firelands which stripped the flesh from my feet and the hope from my heart, of the behemoths of the Deep Ice, and of the love of a woman lost. But those are only a few of countless stepping stones on my journey. A quest, I suppose you could call it, but I wasn't trying to achieve something for the greater good or any of the noble intentions implied in that word. My goal could be called selfish, I suppose, but what deed is done in life that is completely selfless? If you say you've done such a task, you're lying.

I sighed and fell back onto the warm sands. This was peace such as I had not known in a long time. But it could not last. My task is near; I can feel the ordained hour approach. There is just enough time, I feel, I relay to you the biggest answer of my journey. When people recount this tale, I suspect they will ask how, or even where. They should be asking why, for that is at the heart of any true answer. Why, oh why, have I punished myself for so many years. There were others before me, of course. I've seen some of their corpses, and I'll wager a goodly amount they were the lucky ones. There's nothing special about me, before you ask. I haven't stepped where they have not because I have any power or godly blessing to guide my feet. I had one simple thing they did not - desire. They wanted this for fame, fortune or power. And it could bring those things, quite easily. But me, I have a desire. For knowledge. They did not care where they would trepass with this gift as long as it brought them reward. Not I. For me, the need to know what is out there is all that is driving me, and I suppose you could call that innocent. It is anything but. It is about the ending of innocence, if anything.

It is time. I drew my legs up beneath me and leant forward. With my right I clasped at the last remant of a treebranch that had tumbled, for many leagues, to the bottom of the known ocean, and further still, I would think. It had more knowledge that I did of what lay in those dark trenches. I began sketching out the symbols on the sand. They had no meaning to me. They come from an age before spoken language, and that gave them power that no word would ever have. It was not a quick task. As the last rays of despairing sunlight caressed the beach, I hastened my work. For an hour, I moved along the beach, grimly focused on my task. The symbols...they began to move. Intertwining with each other, they became sinuous, writhing...They became alive. I straightened up, breathing heavily. The symbols began to move down the beach, towards the gently-lapping ocean. The tide was changing. Again, it is time. I raised a knife to my chest. Recovered from the wreckage of the first treasure ship that ever set sail from the corpulent East, it glowed golden in the rare light. I took readied myself, and pierced my skin with the metal.

I screamed. I had read about the agony this knife could inflict, and yet there was no way I could have prepared myself. I could feel my blood changing...The heat draining from it. With gritted teeth, I pushed on. If I stopped now I would pay a far greater price than failure. Slowly, I dragged the knife around and across, carving the symbols into my chest. It was done. I dropped the knife and faced out to the ocean. The symbols were almost at the sea...They touched the water.

The ocean roared.

Waves rose, and the sound that pounded against me knocked me flying. I slammed down into the coral sand, feeling still my blood becoming cold. My breathing was slowing...I was finding it hard to draw breath. Had I cut too deep? Had I angered the beast? Agony shot through me again, ripping a scream that did not sound human from my lips. And, I reflected later, it was not.I arched my back as the pain shot through my spine. Blood began to gush from behind my ears - it felt cold against my skin.

The ocean roared again, and the waves rose higher. For a split-second, they hung there, hundreds of metres above my head. I stared up at them, and I will always swear I saw a face staring back at me, laughing.

The waves fell. The ocean claimed me. It claimed me as its own. And never again did my feet feel earth 'neath them, or my skin feel the touch of wind. From that day on, I rode currents faster than any man could ever imagine. I fell deeper than the chasms of our planet deepened thrice over. The ocean claimed me.




Do you remember what I told you on that coral beach, all those years ago? That there are few things more beautiful in this world that a sunset across the waves?

I found them.
Mon 10/10/05 at 16:28
Regular
"Laughingstock"
Posts: 3,522
Great ending. Gave me a tingle of surprise.
My favourite stories are always those which have a timeless, mysterious quality - and this has it.
Sun 09/10/05 at 20:37
Regular
"Going nowhere fast"
Posts: 6,574
Beatifully put together. Love the invoked visuals and the nice finishing touch.
Fri 07/10/05 at 13:51
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
Love the last line, very effective. Nice images too. Can't think of the word I'm looking for, but the epic quest, the marking of symbols, it was very grand (not really the word I'm after - mental block). Enjoyed it.
Fri 07/10/05 at 12:46
Regular
Posts: 16,548
I sat hunched up on the coral white beach, staring out into the sunset. There are few things more beautiful in this world than an unspoilt sunset across water of the finest turquoise. The rich red and yellow rays seem to engulf everything around them in a vain attempt to hold onto the world - clouds, sky, the waves. But it's a futile effort, and one it is destined to always lose. It's a glorious struggle, believe me.

The reason I was here, on this beach, was that I thought I'd come to the end of my journey. It had been a long journey, in distance as well as time. It had taken it's toll. Oh, yes...there was a price to pay for what I was about to accomplish. But isn't there always? I could tell you such stories; of the deep ocean canyons out West that no man but me has seen, of the burning sands of the Firelands which stripped the flesh from my feet and the hope from my heart, of the behemoths of the Deep Ice, and of the love of a woman lost. But those are only a few of countless stepping stones on my journey. A quest, I suppose you could call it, but I wasn't trying to achieve something for the greater good or any of the noble intentions implied in that word. My goal could be called selfish, I suppose, but what deed is done in life that is completely selfless? If you say you've done such a task, you're lying.

I sighed and fell back onto the warm sands. This was peace such as I had not known in a long time. But it could not last. My task is near; I can feel the ordained hour approach. There is just enough time, I feel, I relay to you the biggest answer of my journey. When people recount this tale, I suspect they will ask how, or even where. They should be asking why, for that is at the heart of any true answer. Why, oh why, have I punished myself for so many years. There were others before me, of course. I've seen some of their corpses, and I'll wager a goodly amount they were the lucky ones. There's nothing special about me, before you ask. I haven't stepped where they have not because I have any power or godly blessing to guide my feet. I had one simple thing they did not - desire. They wanted this for fame, fortune or power. And it could bring those things, quite easily. But me, I have a desire. For knowledge. They did not care where they would trepass with this gift as long as it brought them reward. Not I. For me, the need to know what is out there is all that is driving me, and I suppose you could call that innocent. It is anything but. It is about the ending of innocence, if anything.

It is time. I drew my legs up beneath me and leant forward. With my right I clasped at the last remant of a treebranch that had tumbled, for many leagues, to the bottom of the known ocean, and further still, I would think. It had more knowledge that I did of what lay in those dark trenches. I began sketching out the symbols on the sand. They had no meaning to me. They come from an age before spoken language, and that gave them power that no word would ever have. It was not a quick task. As the last rays of despairing sunlight caressed the beach, I hastened my work. For an hour, I moved along the beach, grimly focused on my task. The symbols...they began to move. Intertwining with each other, they became sinuous, writhing...They became alive. I straightened up, breathing heavily. The symbols began to move down the beach, towards the gently-lapping ocean. The tide was changing. Again, it is time. I raised a knife to my chest. Recovered from the wreckage of the first treasure ship that ever set sail from the corpulent East, it glowed golden in the rare light. I took readied myself, and pierced my skin with the metal.

I screamed. I had read about the agony this knife could inflict, and yet there was no way I could have prepared myself. I could feel my blood changing...The heat draining from it. With gritted teeth, I pushed on. If I stopped now I would pay a far greater price than failure. Slowly, I dragged the knife around and across, carving the symbols into my chest. It was done. I dropped the knife and faced out to the ocean. The symbols were almost at the sea...They touched the water.

The ocean roared.

Waves rose, and the sound that pounded against me knocked me flying. I slammed down into the coral sand, feeling still my blood becoming cold. My breathing was slowing...I was finding it hard to draw breath. Had I cut too deep? Had I angered the beast? Agony shot through me again, ripping a scream that did not sound human from my lips. And, I reflected later, it was not.I arched my back as the pain shot through my spine. Blood began to gush from behind my ears - it felt cold against my skin.

The ocean roared again, and the waves rose higher. For a split-second, they hung there, hundreds of metres above my head. I stared up at them, and I will always swear I saw a face staring back at me, laughing.

The waves fell. The ocean claimed me. It claimed me as its own. And never again did my feet feel earth 'neath them, or my skin feel the touch of wind. From that day on, I rode currents faster than any man could ever imagine. I fell deeper than the chasms of our planet deepened thrice over. The ocean claimed me.




Do you remember what I told you on that coral beach, all those years ago? That there are few things more beautiful in this world that a sunset across the waves?

I found them.

Freeola & GetDotted are rated 5 Stars

Check out some of our customer reviews below:

Thank you very much for your help!
Top service for free - excellent - thank you very much for your help.
Very pleased
Very pleased with the help given by your staff. They explained technical details in an easy way and were patient when providing information to a non expert like me.

View More Reviews

Need some help? Give us a call on 01376 55 60 60

Go to Support Centre

It appears you are using an old browser, as such, some parts of the Freeola and Getdotted site will not work as intended. Using the latest version of your browser, or another browser such as Google Chrome, Mozilla Firefox, or Opera will provide a better, safer browsing experience for you.