The "Creative Writing" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
Samuel Gregory was walking down a busy street. He was looking for a Tour Bus as he was in Amsterdam for a Holiday. He was annoyed when he got to a bus stop and a Tour Bus left. He sat on the Bus Stop's bench and waited for a Tour Bus. But little did he know that death waits for him on the Tour Bus...
The Tour Bus arrived. He was relieved. A part of Samuel was saying..."don't go..." but most of him was saying..."Go, you'll enjoy it...". He found a seat. It was the only seat and he was sitting next to a old lady. She smiled at him. He smiled back.
The Tour bus started.
"I've always loved Tour Buses." croacked the old lady. Samuel realised that she had a French accent. "My son used to go on," she continued. "but unfortunatly the bus crashed and he died."
Samuel felt sorry for the old lady. "Really..." began Samuel, "I'm...sorry." The old lady smiled at him. The bus was moving about 30MPH.
"Ok passnegers. Your 'Tour Speakers' are now functioning. Please look at the seat in front of you and you'll see at the back of it is a control pad and some Headsets. Please plug your Microphones in and choose your Language. You'll then hear a man speaking. He'll tell you about the places you'll see. Also, we have 8 languages. There should be a poster showing what number represents what Language. If yours isn't there please ask me for a new one. Thank you." The man put his Microphone down and sat on a seat looking relieved.
All of the passengers did exactly what he asked. But the old lady didn't. She already fell asleep. Samuel changed the Language to English. He listened to the man soeaking about how many attractions they are.
Samuel turned the volume up..."To your right is where Anne Frank wrote her diary. It's one of the most visited places and the diary has now turned into a book called The Diary Of Anne Frank and is being sold in hundreds of different languages. To your r-r-r-r-i-i-i-"
Samuel's microphone was going fuzzy. He looked at the other people to see if there microphones were going fuzzy to but everyone looked just fine. The Tour Bus Stopped. Some people got out. Samuel tried his headset again.
"R-r-r-r-r-r-r-r! Samuel-"
Samuel got shocked when it said his name.
"Samuel. I've hacked into this microphone. Only you can hear me. If you try talking I'll hear you. That's the cool thing."
Samuel said, "Who the hell are you?"
"Samuel! I was sittin' right behind you. I've gone now. I've killed the old lady next to you. Just check her back!"
Samuel quickly checked. There was blood everywhere. "I'm gonna tell the-"
"You tell the cops and you die." The voice said. "Now. I've planted a bomb on this bus. Look on the seat behind you and you'll see my jacket. Look at it and you'll see a bomb."
Samuel looked behind him, got the jacket and looked inside. There was a bomb. Ten more mibutes 'till the bus was blown sky-high.
"Ok I'm shwoing this to the driver and you ain't stoppin' me!" Samuel said.
"Oh yeah?" The voice said again. "You do that and I'll set the bomb to explode now! I've got the remote you know!
Samuel didn't believe him but he couldn't take any risks.
"NOW!" Shouted the voice. "You listen up. You do as I tell you and no-one gets hurt."
"Fine!" Samuel said.
"Bits."
"What?"
"It's a code name Samuel. Do you know what it stands for?"
"No."
"Blood In The Snow."
Samuel thought. Blood In The Snow? What the hell was that?
"What's that?" Samuel asked suspicously.
"It's something I've made up to...kill people."
"How?"
"Look at the old lady again!"
Samuel looked and she wasn't there. He froze.
"Where did she go?" Samuel asked.
"In the snow to freeze!" The voice said. "There'll be a patch of blood of where her body is!! Now, what I want you to do is for you to drive the bus and drive it to Snowy Meadows. DO IT!"
Samuel stood up. He walked to where the driver was. The man looked at him. The driver was concentrating on the road. Samuel kicked the man. His uniform got stained a bit. The driver got shocked and started turning a lot. Samuel picked the man up and threw him out of the fornt window. Everyone screamed. The driver got punched. He fell of his seat and was leaning against the door. Samuel pressed the door release button. The driver went flying out. He looked at the jacket. Five minutes left.
He went at a speed of 120MPH! He was dodging cars and was trying to focus on the road but to many people were screaming.
"SHUT UP!" Samuel shouted.
He saw a sign saying "Now entering Snowy Meadows". He drove as fast as he could. Only two minutes left.
He crashed into a tree.
The bus got flipped into the air and was rolling down a hill. He fell of his seat and started crawling to where he had been sitting previously. He got the microphones and started talking.
"I'm here!" He said.
"Good work. With one minute to spare. I'll turn off the bomb now."
He turned it of. At the same time Samuel went flying out of the window. He landed in the snow and heard an explosion. The explosion wasn't caused by the man. It was caused by him. The bus had tipped over to one side.
"Samuel!"
Samuel turned around and saw a man with a gun.
"Samuel! I lured you here so I could add you to my collection of the people I killed. Look around Samuel!! Can you see the corpses blood! And you're next!"
Samuel looked around him. There was blood everywhere.
"Goodbye Samuel!"
He shot.
The bullet went racing to Samuel but he ducked and went charging. But the man shot again and this time didn't miss. Samuel fell to the ground, his hand on his chest.
The man walked up to him. He pointed his gun at Samuel's head. "How rude of me to forget. My name's Ricardo. Now it's time for you to - GOD!"
Samuel kicked him in the face. He was bleeding and he dropped the gun. Samuel grabbed it and started shooting him. he shot him eight times! He was finally dead.
Soon after twenty years later Samuel died. A teenager called Mike went on a Tour Bus. After twenty minutes he plugged in his microphones. It went all fuzzy. A man spoke...It was Ricardo...
The Tour Bus arrived. He was relieved. A part of Samuel was saying..."don't go..." but most of him was saying..."Go, you'll enjoy it...". He found a seat. It was the only seat and he was sitting next to a old lady. She smiled at him. He smiled back.
The Tour bus started.
"I've always loved Tour Buses." croacked the old lady. Samuel realised that she had a French accent. "My son used to go on," she continued. "but unfortunatly the bus crashed and he died."
Samuel felt sorry for the old lady. "Really..." began Samuel, "I'm...sorry." The old lady smiled at him. The bus was moving about 30MPH.
"Ok passnegers. Your 'Tour Speakers' are now functioning. Please look at the seat in front of you and you'll see at the back of it is a control pad and some Headsets. Please plug your Microphones in and choose your Language. You'll then hear a man speaking. He'll tell you about the places you'll see. Also, we have 8 languages. There should be a poster showing what number represents what Language. If yours isn't there please ask me for a new one. Thank you." The man put his Microphone down and sat on a seat looking relieved.
All of the passengers did exactly what he asked. But the old lady didn't. She already fell asleep. Samuel changed the Language to English. He listened to the man soeaking about how many attractions they are.
Samuel turned the volume up..."To your right is where Anne Frank wrote her diary. It's one of the most visited places and the diary has now turned into a book called The Diary Of Anne Frank and is being sold in hundreds of different languages. To your r-r-r-r-i-i-i-"
Samuel's microphone was going fuzzy. He looked at the other people to see if there microphones were going fuzzy to but everyone looked just fine. The Tour Bus Stopped. Some people got out. Samuel tried his headset again.
"R-r-r-r-r-r-r-r! Samuel-"
Samuel got shocked when it said his name.
"Samuel. I've hacked into this microphone. Only you can hear me. If you try talking I'll hear you. That's the cool thing."
Samuel said, "Who the hell are you?"
"Samuel! I was sittin' right behind you. I've gone now. I've killed the old lady next to you. Just check her back!"
Samuel quickly checked. There was blood everywhere. "I'm gonna tell the-"
"You tell the cops and you die." The voice said. "Now. I've planted a bomb on this bus. Look on the seat behind you and you'll see my jacket. Look at it and you'll see a bomb."
Samuel looked behind him, got the jacket and looked inside. There was a bomb. Ten more mibutes 'till the bus was blown sky-high.
"Ok I'm shwoing this to the driver and you ain't stoppin' me!" Samuel said.
"Oh yeah?" The voice said again. "You do that and I'll set the bomb to explode now! I've got the remote you know!
Samuel didn't believe him but he couldn't take any risks.
"NOW!" Shouted the voice. "You listen up. You do as I tell you and no-one gets hurt."
"Fine!" Samuel said.
"Bits."
"What?"
"It's a code name Samuel. Do you know what it stands for?"
"No."
"Blood In The Snow."
Samuel thought. Blood In The Snow? What the hell was that?
"What's that?" Samuel asked suspicously.
"It's something I've made up to...kill people."
"How?"
"Look at the old lady again!"
Samuel looked and she wasn't there. He froze.
"Where did she go?" Samuel asked.
"In the snow to freeze!" The voice said. "There'll be a patch of blood of where her body is!! Now, what I want you to do is for you to drive the bus and drive it to Snowy Meadows. DO IT!"
Samuel stood up. He walked to where the driver was. The man looked at him. The driver was concentrating on the road. Samuel kicked the man. His uniform got stained a bit. The driver got shocked and started turning a lot. Samuel picked the man up and threw him out of the fornt window. Everyone screamed. The driver got punched. He fell of his seat and was leaning against the door. Samuel pressed the door release button. The driver went flying out. He looked at the jacket. Five minutes left.
He went at a speed of 120MPH! He was dodging cars and was trying to focus on the road but to many people were screaming.
"SHUT UP!" Samuel shouted.
He saw a sign saying "Now entering Snowy Meadows". He drove as fast as he could. Only two minutes left.
He crashed into a tree.
The bus got flipped into the air and was rolling down a hill. He fell of his seat and started crawling to where he had been sitting previously. He got the microphones and started talking.
"I'm here!" He said.
"Good work. With one minute to spare. I'll turn off the bomb now."
He turned it of. At the same time Samuel went flying out of the window. He landed in the snow and heard an explosion. The explosion wasn't caused by the man. It was caused by him. The bus had tipped over to one side.
"Samuel!"
Samuel turned around and saw a man with a gun.
"Samuel! I lured you here so I could add you to my collection of the people I killed. Look around Samuel!! Can you see the corpses blood! And you're next!"
Samuel looked around him. There was blood everywhere.
"Goodbye Samuel!"
He shot.
The bullet went racing to Samuel but he ducked and went charging. But the man shot again and this time didn't miss. Samuel fell to the ground, his hand on his chest.
The man walked up to him. He pointed his gun at Samuel's head. "How rude of me to forget. My name's Ricardo. Now it's time for you to - GOD!"
Samuel kicked him in the face. He was bleeding and he dropped the gun. Samuel grabbed it and started shooting him. he shot him eight times! He was finally dead.
Soon after twenty years later Samuel died. A teenager called Mike went on a Tour Bus. After twenty minutes he plugged in his microphones. It went all fuzzy. A man spoke...It was Ricardo...
Indeed. Not too bad though, well enough written.
Plenty of imagination, but there didn't seem to be much of a point for Ricardo to lure Samuel there, just to kill him.
Thanks. This didn't take me a long time. I thought it'll be my best one yet.
Nice story.
WOW that was great im going to write another one now Im going to write loads this weekend when I get my own Laptop.
That'll be hard!
But you could spend all this time working on one really good entry and have a much better chance of winning.
Loads! So I have a chance of winning! This is my third story! :D
How many entries are you planning to do?
Samuel Gregory was walking down a busy street. He was looking for a Tour Bus as he was in Amsterdam for a Holiday. He was annoyed when he got to a bus stop and a Tour Bus left. He sat on the Bus Stop's bench and waited for a Tour Bus. But little did he know that death waits for him on the Tour Bus...
The Tour Bus arrived. He was relieved. A part of Samuel was saying..."don't go..." but most of him was saying..."Go, you'll enjoy it...". He found a seat. It was the only seat and he was sitting next to a old lady. She smiled at him. He smiled back.
The Tour bus started.
"I've always loved Tour Buses." croacked the old lady. Samuel realised that she had a French accent. "My son used to go on," she continued. "but unfortunatly the bus crashed and he died."
Samuel felt sorry for the old lady. "Really..." began Samuel, "I'm...sorry." The old lady smiled at him. The bus was moving about 30MPH.
"Ok passnegers. Your 'Tour Speakers' are now functioning. Please look at the seat in front of you and you'll see at the back of it is a control pad and some Headsets. Please plug your Microphones in and choose your Language. You'll then hear a man speaking. He'll tell you about the places you'll see. Also, we have 8 languages. There should be a poster showing what number represents what Language. If yours isn't there please ask me for a new one. Thank you." The man put his Microphone down and sat on a seat looking relieved.
All of the passengers did exactly what he asked. But the old lady didn't. She already fell asleep. Samuel changed the Language to English. He listened to the man soeaking about how many attractions they are.
Samuel turned the volume up..."To your right is where Anne Frank wrote her diary. It's one of the most visited places and the diary has now turned into a book called The Diary Of Anne Frank and is being sold in hundreds of different languages. To your r-r-r-r-i-i-i-"
Samuel's microphone was going fuzzy. He looked at the other people to see if there microphones were going fuzzy to but everyone looked just fine. The Tour Bus Stopped. Some people got out. Samuel tried his headset again.
"R-r-r-r-r-r-r-r! Samuel-"
Samuel got shocked when it said his name.
"Samuel. I've hacked into this microphone. Only you can hear me. If you try talking I'll hear you. That's the cool thing."
Samuel said, "Who the hell are you?"
"Samuel! I was sittin' right behind you. I've gone now. I've killed the old lady next to you. Just check her back!"
Samuel quickly checked. There was blood everywhere. "I'm gonna tell the-"
"You tell the cops and you die." The voice said. "Now. I've planted a bomb on this bus. Look on the seat behind you and you'll see my jacket. Look at it and you'll see a bomb."
Samuel looked behind him, got the jacket and looked inside. There was a bomb. Ten more mibutes 'till the bus was blown sky-high.
"Ok I'm shwoing this to the driver and you ain't stoppin' me!" Samuel said.
"Oh yeah?" The voice said again. "You do that and I'll set the bomb to explode now! I've got the remote you know!
Samuel didn't believe him but he couldn't take any risks.
"NOW!" Shouted the voice. "You listen up. You do as I tell you and no-one gets hurt."
"Fine!" Samuel said.
"Bits."
"What?"
"It's a code name Samuel. Do you know what it stands for?"
"No."
"Blood In The Snow."
Samuel thought. Blood In The Snow? What the hell was that?
"What's that?" Samuel asked suspicously.
"It's something I've made up to...kill people."
"How?"
"Look at the old lady again!"
Samuel looked and she wasn't there. He froze.
"Where did she go?" Samuel asked.
"In the snow to freeze!" The voice said. "There'll be a patch of blood of where her body is!! Now, what I want you to do is for you to drive the bus and drive it to Snowy Meadows. DO IT!"
Samuel stood up. He walked to where the driver was. The man looked at him. The driver was concentrating on the road. Samuel kicked the man. His uniform got stained a bit. The driver got shocked and started turning a lot. Samuel picked the man up and threw him out of the fornt window. Everyone screamed. The driver got punched. He fell of his seat and was leaning against the door. Samuel pressed the door release button. The driver went flying out. He looked at the jacket. Five minutes left.
He went at a speed of 120MPH! He was dodging cars and was trying to focus on the road but to many people were screaming.
"SHUT UP!" Samuel shouted.
He saw a sign saying "Now entering Snowy Meadows". He drove as fast as he could. Only two minutes left.
He crashed into a tree.
The bus got flipped into the air and was rolling down a hill. He fell of his seat and started crawling to where he had been sitting previously. He got the microphones and started talking.
"I'm here!" He said.
"Good work. With one minute to spare. I'll turn off the bomb now."
He turned it of. At the same time Samuel went flying out of the window. He landed in the snow and heard an explosion. The explosion wasn't caused by the man. It was caused by him. The bus had tipped over to one side.
"Samuel!"
Samuel turned around and saw a man with a gun.
"Samuel! I lured you here so I could add you to my collection of the people I killed. Look around Samuel!! Can you see the corpses blood! And you're next!"
Samuel looked around him. There was blood everywhere.
"Goodbye Samuel!"
He shot.
The bullet went racing to Samuel but he ducked and went charging. But the man shot again and this time didn't miss. Samuel fell to the ground, his hand on his chest.
The man walked up to him. He pointed his gun at Samuel's head. "How rude of me to forget. My name's Ricardo. Now it's time for you to - GOD!"
Samuel kicked him in the face. He was bleeding and he dropped the gun. Samuel grabbed it and started shooting him. he shot him eight times! He was finally dead.
Soon after twenty years later Samuel died. A teenager called Mike went on a Tour Bus. After twenty minutes he plugged in his microphones. It went all fuzzy. A man spoke...It was Ricardo...
The Tour Bus arrived. He was relieved. A part of Samuel was saying..."don't go..." but most of him was saying..."Go, you'll enjoy it...". He found a seat. It was the only seat and he was sitting next to a old lady. She smiled at him. He smiled back.
The Tour bus started.
"I've always loved Tour Buses." croacked the old lady. Samuel realised that she had a French accent. "My son used to go on," she continued. "but unfortunatly the bus crashed and he died."
Samuel felt sorry for the old lady. "Really..." began Samuel, "I'm...sorry." The old lady smiled at him. The bus was moving about 30MPH.
"Ok passnegers. Your 'Tour Speakers' are now functioning. Please look at the seat in front of you and you'll see at the back of it is a control pad and some Headsets. Please plug your Microphones in and choose your Language. You'll then hear a man speaking. He'll tell you about the places you'll see. Also, we have 8 languages. There should be a poster showing what number represents what Language. If yours isn't there please ask me for a new one. Thank you." The man put his Microphone down and sat on a seat looking relieved.
All of the passengers did exactly what he asked. But the old lady didn't. She already fell asleep. Samuel changed the Language to English. He listened to the man soeaking about how many attractions they are.
Samuel turned the volume up..."To your right is where Anne Frank wrote her diary. It's one of the most visited places and the diary has now turned into a book called The Diary Of Anne Frank and is being sold in hundreds of different languages. To your r-r-r-r-i-i-i-"
Samuel's microphone was going fuzzy. He looked at the other people to see if there microphones were going fuzzy to but everyone looked just fine. The Tour Bus Stopped. Some people got out. Samuel tried his headset again.
"R-r-r-r-r-r-r-r! Samuel-"
Samuel got shocked when it said his name.
"Samuel. I've hacked into this microphone. Only you can hear me. If you try talking I'll hear you. That's the cool thing."
Samuel said, "Who the hell are you?"
"Samuel! I was sittin' right behind you. I've gone now. I've killed the old lady next to you. Just check her back!"
Samuel quickly checked. There was blood everywhere. "I'm gonna tell the-"
"You tell the cops and you die." The voice said. "Now. I've planted a bomb on this bus. Look on the seat behind you and you'll see my jacket. Look at it and you'll see a bomb."
Samuel looked behind him, got the jacket and looked inside. There was a bomb. Ten more mibutes 'till the bus was blown sky-high.
"Ok I'm shwoing this to the driver and you ain't stoppin' me!" Samuel said.
"Oh yeah?" The voice said again. "You do that and I'll set the bomb to explode now! I've got the remote you know!
Samuel didn't believe him but he couldn't take any risks.
"NOW!" Shouted the voice. "You listen up. You do as I tell you and no-one gets hurt."
"Fine!" Samuel said.
"Bits."
"What?"
"It's a code name Samuel. Do you know what it stands for?"
"No."
"Blood In The Snow."
Samuel thought. Blood In The Snow? What the hell was that?
"What's that?" Samuel asked suspicously.
"It's something I've made up to...kill people."
"How?"
"Look at the old lady again!"
Samuel looked and she wasn't there. He froze.
"Where did she go?" Samuel asked.
"In the snow to freeze!" The voice said. "There'll be a patch of blood of where her body is!! Now, what I want you to do is for you to drive the bus and drive it to Snowy Meadows. DO IT!"
Samuel stood up. He walked to where the driver was. The man looked at him. The driver was concentrating on the road. Samuel kicked the man. His uniform got stained a bit. The driver got shocked and started turning a lot. Samuel picked the man up and threw him out of the fornt window. Everyone screamed. The driver got punched. He fell of his seat and was leaning against the door. Samuel pressed the door release button. The driver went flying out. He looked at the jacket. Five minutes left.
He went at a speed of 120MPH! He was dodging cars and was trying to focus on the road but to many people were screaming.
"SHUT UP!" Samuel shouted.
He saw a sign saying "Now entering Snowy Meadows". He drove as fast as he could. Only two minutes left.
He crashed into a tree.
The bus got flipped into the air and was rolling down a hill. He fell of his seat and started crawling to where he had been sitting previously. He got the microphones and started talking.
"I'm here!" He said.
"Good work. With one minute to spare. I'll turn off the bomb now."
He turned it of. At the same time Samuel went flying out of the window. He landed in the snow and heard an explosion. The explosion wasn't caused by the man. It was caused by him. The bus had tipped over to one side.
"Samuel!"
Samuel turned around and saw a man with a gun.
"Samuel! I lured you here so I could add you to my collection of the people I killed. Look around Samuel!! Can you see the corpses blood! And you're next!"
Samuel looked around him. There was blood everywhere.
"Goodbye Samuel!"
He shot.
The bullet went racing to Samuel but he ducked and went charging. But the man shot again and this time didn't miss. Samuel fell to the ground, his hand on his chest.
The man walked up to him. He pointed his gun at Samuel's head. "How rude of me to forget. My name's Ricardo. Now it's time for you to - GOD!"
Samuel kicked him in the face. He was bleeding and he dropped the gun. Samuel grabbed it and started shooting him. he shot him eight times! He was finally dead.
Soon after twenty years later Samuel died. A teenager called Mike went on a Tour Bus. After twenty minutes he plugged in his microphones. It went all fuzzy. A man spoke...It was Ricardo...