Viewing Thread:
"Chav um things yeah"

Know this should hopefully bring a smile to some of your faces:

>>>>>>1. What do you call a chav in a box?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Innit.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >2. What do you call a chav in a filing cabinet?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Sorted
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >3. What do you call a chav in a box with a lock on it?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Safe.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >4. What do you call an Eskimo chav?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Innuinnit.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >5. Why are Chavs like slinkies?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down
>>>>>>a flight
>>>>>>of stairs.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >6. What do you call a Chavette in a white tracksuit?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-The bride.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >7. You're in your car and you see a Chav on a bike, why
>>>>>>should you try
>>>>>>not to hit him?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-It might be your bike.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >8. What's the difference between a Chav and a coconut?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-One's thick and hairy, the other's a coconut.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >9. What's the first question at a Chav quiz night?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-What you lookin' at?"
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >10. How do you get 100 Chavs into a phone box?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Paint three stripes on it.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >11. Two Chavs in a car without any music. Who's driving?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-The police
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >12. What do you call a chav with 9 GCSE's?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-A liar.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >13. What do you say to a chav with a job?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Can I have a big mac please
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >14. What do you say to a chav in a suit?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Will the defendant please stand
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >15. What do u call a knife in chaville?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Exhibit A
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >16. Why is 3 chavs going over a cliff in a Nova a shame?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-A Nova seats 4
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >17. What do you call a 30 year old chavette?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-Granny.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >18. How many chavs does it take to change a lightbulb?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-One, they'll screw anything.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >19. What do you call 100 chavs at the bottom of a river?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-A start.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >20. How many chavs does it take to clean a floor?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-None, "That's some uvver bleeders job innit."
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >21. Why did the chav take a shower?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-He didn't mean to, he just forgot to close the Nova's window
>>>>>>in the
>>>>>>car wash
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >22. Why did the Chav cross the road?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-To start a fight with a random stranger for no reason
>>>>>>whatsoever.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >23. What do you call a Chav at college?
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >-The cleaner.
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >24. A bus full of Chavs were driving through Wales. As they
>>>>>>were
>>>>>>approaching Llanfgogogferrinfourasoch they started arguing
>>>>>>about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back
>>>>>>and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the
>>>>>>counter, one Chav asked the blonde employee, "Before we order,
>>>>>>could you settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce
>>>>>>where we are... very slowly?"
>>>>>>- The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said,
>>>>>>"Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr-Kiiiiing."
>>>>>> >
>>>>>> >25. Two chavs jump off beachy head, who wins?
>>>>>> >
>-Society.

I like.

lol

Lol, Typical Harlow comments. :D

:D

These are ollllllld. However this definition of a 'Harlow Pub Quiz' always makes me laugh:

1. Harlow Pub Quiz
Entertainment regularly held at the Essex town's popular nightspots. The quizmaster usually asks one of two questions: "What the f* are you looking at?" or "Do you f*ing want some?", to which all the possible answer are wrong."

How does a chav turn the lights off after sex? They close the car door.

What does a chav use for protection during sex? A bus shelter.

What did the chav say to the prostitute? "Fancy a lift home Mum?"


Indeed.

The filing cabinet is full of huskies?

And I just made it up.
*pose*

hehe this is getting good lol

What do you call a chav under a filing cabinet?

Mush.