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It’s ages since I went to Wakefield to meet the girls so I thought I’d share the gossip with you that I’d been missing out on – well not all of it.
So firstly I find out that the landlord of the pub we usually go in has left his wife and kids and moved into a flat with one of his barmaids. He is 44 and has moved in with his 18 year old shaggette. Although that isn’t criminal - it should be. Especially seeing as he has a 23 year old daughter.
A friend has been arrested for biting her neighbour. The charge is false but she still has to keep going to the cop shop
Another friend has been arrested for masterminding a spate of particularly nasty armed robberies at some fast food outlets. I know they say that you don’t really know people but that is just laughable. They have been to her mothers house (she still lives with her mum) because they’d been told that all the machetes and pickaxe handles were there. Oddly enough they didn’t find anything but you can imagine the conversation:
“ ’Ere Sarge – I’ve found a machete”
“ Do you mind – that’s my butter knife. Give it here and I’ll prove it “
“ Er, no, that’s okay thanks. I’ll just keep hold of it “
She hasn’t sent me any text messages and jokes for ages so I thought we must have fallen out but apparently the Police kept her phone.
I just don’t get gossip like that round at my local!
So firstly I find out that the landlord of the pub we usually go in has left his wife and kids and moved into a flat with one of his barmaids. He is 44 and has moved in with his 18 year old shaggette. Although that isn’t criminal - it should be. Especially seeing as he has a 23 year old daughter.
A friend has been arrested for biting her neighbour. The charge is false but she still has to keep going to the cop shop
Another friend has been arrested for masterminding a spate of particularly nasty armed robberies at some fast food outlets. I know they say that you don’t really know people but that is just laughable. They have been to her mothers house (she still lives with her mum) because they’d been told that all the machetes and pickaxe handles were there. Oddly enough they didn’t find anything but you can imagine the conversation:
“ ’Ere Sarge – I’ve found a machete”
“ Do you mind – that’s my butter knife. Give it here and I’ll prove it “
“ Er, no, that’s okay thanks. I’ll just keep hold of it “
She hasn’t sent me any text messages and jokes for ages so I thought we must have fallen out but apparently the Police kept her phone.
I just don’t get gossip like that round at my local!
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Chippxero wrote:
> Hedfix wrote:
> Do you live in or around Essex by any chance?
>
> I live in essex i don't know any criminals really :( feel like i am
> missing out.
How is this possible? Unless you're in a nice posh part (they exist, apparently). I've lived in Essex all my life and lemme tell you its as bad as its reputation. The town next to mine there was a girl that got raped in her own home, the local media said she was aged between 6 and 10, but they couldnt say her actual age. The drug culture here is also shocking, I know a 14 year old who grows his own in his bedroom. And dont even get me started on the number of chavs here......
> Hedfix wrote:
> Do you live in or around Essex by any chance?
>
> I live in essex i don't know any criminals really :( feel like i am
> missing out.
How is this possible? Unless you're in a nice posh part (they exist, apparently). I've lived in Essex all my life and lemme tell you its as bad as its reputation. The town next to mine there was a girl that got raped in her own home, the local media said she was aged between 6 and 10, but they couldnt say her actual age. The drug culture here is also shocking, I know a 14 year old who grows his own in his bedroom. And dont even get me started on the number of chavs here......
The stories sound like they were reeled out for enjoyment values or lifted confidentally from Emmerdale, safe in the knowledge that no-one ever watches it
People biting neighbours is a very 'Eastenders' sounding plotline but they have to get their inspiration from somewhere and if you live in Essex that would explain a lot
People biting neighbours is a very 'Eastenders' sounding plotline but they have to get their inspiration from somewhere and if you live in Essex that would explain a lot
Super Kev wrote:
> Deathskitten wrote:
> Super Kev wrote:
> Just one word : CHAV
>
> takes one to know one
>
> I think me & you are going to fall out soon Miss Death!
u luv me really!
> Deathskitten wrote:
> Super Kev wrote:
> Just one word : CHAV
>
> takes one to know one
>
> I think me & you are going to fall out soon Miss Death!
u luv me really!
Deathskitten wrote:
> Super Kev wrote:
> Just one word : CHAV
>
> takes one to know one
I think me & you are going to fall out soon Miss Death!
> Super Kev wrote:
> Just one word : CHAV
>
> takes one to know one
I think me & you are going to fall out soon Miss Death!
Hedfix wrote:
> Do you live in or around Essex by any chance?
I live in essex i don't know any criminals really :( feel like i am missing out.
> Do you live in or around Essex by any chance?
I live in essex i don't know any criminals really :( feel like i am missing out.
Super Kev wrote:
> Just one word : CHAV
takes one to know one
> Just one word : CHAV
takes one to know one
Just one word : CHAV
Pfft... Life is far too much fun to be part of a soap opera.
She
Sounds like she lives in a soap opera to me...
Edit: Thanks for the correction Lil Bro.
Edit: Thanks for the correction Lil Bro.
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