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Here's my effort. It probably won't win, but I like it okay, and it's nice and short.
“LARRY!
Get away from the walls! For the love of God, get away from the walls!”
Larry jumped back after Barry’s warning.
“Damn it, Larry, you know what I told you about the walls.” Barry started.
Larry sheepishly nodded. “I’m sorry, I was just leaning against them, that’s all.”
“Well, don’t in future Larry. You know what lives between the walls.”
Larry did know, he knew only too well. He’d wake up in the middle of the night and hear scratching or moaning noises, and sometimes he even fancied to himself that he’d seen yellow eyes leering at him, but there were no cracks in the wall, so he thought it must be his imagination. Larry was glad Barry was here though. He didn’t come around much. Larry might not see him for days or weeks until he’d turn up again, seemingly out of nowhere. But when Barry did show up, he was a lot of fun. He was Larry’s best friend.
He and Barry sat in silence for a while, contemplating the situation. Barry had appeared last night while Larry was asleep, waking him up suddenly. They talked for a while, then they’d heard the Creatures between the walls. They seemed excited, and they were screeching. Larry got a bit antsy and tried to make Barry leave, but he wouldn’t go for some reason. Then they discovered the Creatures had sealed up the doors, and there was no way out. Larry imagined them as vultures, circling their prey. He could hear little crows of delight coming from them as the scampered around the four walls in the room.
“There has to be a way to get out, Larry.” Barry had said. But he’d came up with nothing.
When they started to get hungry though, Barry had a brainwave.
“Lets break down the door.”
Larry and Barry hauled themselves up and walked towards where the door was.
It wasn’t there anymore.
All that remained was what looked like pillows fixed to it. Barry cursed the Creatures for what they had did and slumped disconsolately to the floor.
Larry didn’t like to see his best friend so depressed, so he put his mind to work thinking up a plan to escape past these Creatures.
After a few hours in which he mumbled, moaned, wept, pounded the floor in annoyance and cursed every god above the sun did he come up with a plan.
“I’ve got it, Barry!!” He yelled. “What we do is, I pound the walls and bait the creatures. You take off your shoes and hide in the corner, and when they come after me, you pound ‘em.”
Barry dried off his tears, meekly agreed and removed his footwear.
When Mr. Perkins delivered James Mattison his food ten minutes later he felt blind pity for the man. There he was, standing with no shoes on, hitting the walls with a tearstained face and yelling hoarsely for the “scum to come out from between the walls, because he knew they were there” and telling someone named Barry to be ready to “pound ‘em”.
Perkins sighed, muttered to himself and set the food tray down. Room 40 was the last in his floor. He left, closed the padded door, clocked out, and left the asylum.
“LARRY!
Get away from the walls! For the love of God, get away from the walls!”
Larry jumped back after Barry’s warning.
“Damn it, Larry, you know what I told you about the walls.” Barry started.
Larry sheepishly nodded. “I’m sorry, I was just leaning against them, that’s all.”
“Well, don’t in future Larry. You know what lives between the walls.”
Larry did know, he knew only too well. He’d wake up in the middle of the night and hear scratching or moaning noises, and sometimes he even fancied to himself that he’d seen yellow eyes leering at him, but there were no cracks in the wall, so he thought it must be his imagination. Larry was glad Barry was here though. He didn’t come around much. Larry might not see him for days or weeks until he’d turn up again, seemingly out of nowhere. But when Barry did show up, he was a lot of fun. He was Larry’s best friend.
He and Barry sat in silence for a while, contemplating the situation. Barry had appeared last night while Larry was asleep, waking him up suddenly. They talked for a while, then they’d heard the Creatures between the walls. They seemed excited, and they were screeching. Larry got a bit antsy and tried to make Barry leave, but he wouldn’t go for some reason. Then they discovered the Creatures had sealed up the doors, and there was no way out. Larry imagined them as vultures, circling their prey. He could hear little crows of delight coming from them as the scampered around the four walls in the room.
“There has to be a way to get out, Larry.” Barry had said. But he’d came up with nothing.
When they started to get hungry though, Barry had a brainwave.
“Lets break down the door.”
Larry and Barry hauled themselves up and walked towards where the door was.
It wasn’t there anymore.
All that remained was what looked like pillows fixed to it. Barry cursed the Creatures for what they had did and slumped disconsolately to the floor.
Larry didn’t like to see his best friend so depressed, so he put his mind to work thinking up a plan to escape past these Creatures.
After a few hours in which he mumbled, moaned, wept, pounded the floor in annoyance and cursed every god above the sun did he come up with a plan.
“I’ve got it, Barry!!” He yelled. “What we do is, I pound the walls and bait the creatures. You take off your shoes and hide in the corner, and when they come after me, you pound ‘em.”
Barry dried off his tears, meekly agreed and removed his footwear.
When Mr. Perkins delivered James Mattison his food ten minutes later he felt blind pity for the man. There he was, standing with no shoes on, hitting the walls with a tearstained face and yelling hoarsely for the “scum to come out from between the walls, because he knew they were there” and telling someone named Barry to be ready to “pound ‘em”.
Perkins sighed, muttered to himself and set the food tray down. Room 40 was the last in his floor. He left, closed the padded door, clocked out, and left the asylum.
I'll admit that it wasn't doing anything for me, that is until the last paragraph. Yep, I definitely like this.
I thought the story was a bit odd, but the twist explained all. I really liked it.
I liked that.
Heh, good.
Liked the twist, never took itself overly serious and was generally well formed. It probably won't win, like you said, but enjoyable nonetheless.
Liked the twist, never took itself overly serious and was generally well formed. It probably won't win, like you said, but enjoyable nonetheless.
Ahar, most good.
Here's my effort. It probably won't win, but I like it okay, and it's nice and short.
“LARRY!
Get away from the walls! For the love of God, get away from the walls!”
Larry jumped back after Barry’s warning.
“Damn it, Larry, you know what I told you about the walls.” Barry started.
Larry sheepishly nodded. “I’m sorry, I was just leaning against them, that’s all.”
“Well, don’t in future Larry. You know what lives between the walls.”
Larry did know, he knew only too well. He’d wake up in the middle of the night and hear scratching or moaning noises, and sometimes he even fancied to himself that he’d seen yellow eyes leering at him, but there were no cracks in the wall, so he thought it must be his imagination. Larry was glad Barry was here though. He didn’t come around much. Larry might not see him for days or weeks until he’d turn up again, seemingly out of nowhere. But when Barry did show up, he was a lot of fun. He was Larry’s best friend.
He and Barry sat in silence for a while, contemplating the situation. Barry had appeared last night while Larry was asleep, waking him up suddenly. They talked for a while, then they’d heard the Creatures between the walls. They seemed excited, and they were screeching. Larry got a bit antsy and tried to make Barry leave, but he wouldn’t go for some reason. Then they discovered the Creatures had sealed up the doors, and there was no way out. Larry imagined them as vultures, circling their prey. He could hear little crows of delight coming from them as the scampered around the four walls in the room.
“There has to be a way to get out, Larry.” Barry had said. But he’d came up with nothing.
When they started to get hungry though, Barry had a brainwave.
“Lets break down the door.”
Larry and Barry hauled themselves up and walked towards where the door was.
It wasn’t there anymore.
All that remained was what looked like pillows fixed to it. Barry cursed the Creatures for what they had did and slumped disconsolately to the floor.
Larry didn’t like to see his best friend so depressed, so he put his mind to work thinking up a plan to escape past these Creatures.
After a few hours in which he mumbled, moaned, wept, pounded the floor in annoyance and cursed every god above the sun did he come up with a plan.
“I’ve got it, Barry!!” He yelled. “What we do is, I pound the walls and bait the creatures. You take off your shoes and hide in the corner, and when they come after me, you pound ‘em.”
Barry dried off his tears, meekly agreed and removed his footwear.
When Mr. Perkins delivered James Mattison his food ten minutes later he felt blind pity for the man. There he was, standing with no shoes on, hitting the walls with a tearstained face and yelling hoarsely for the “scum to come out from between the walls, because he knew they were there” and telling someone named Barry to be ready to “pound ‘em”.
Perkins sighed, muttered to himself and set the food tray down. Room 40 was the last in his floor. He left, closed the padded door, clocked out, and left the asylum.
“LARRY!
Get away from the walls! For the love of God, get away from the walls!”
Larry jumped back after Barry’s warning.
“Damn it, Larry, you know what I told you about the walls.” Barry started.
Larry sheepishly nodded. “I’m sorry, I was just leaning against them, that’s all.”
“Well, don’t in future Larry. You know what lives between the walls.”
Larry did know, he knew only too well. He’d wake up in the middle of the night and hear scratching or moaning noises, and sometimes he even fancied to himself that he’d seen yellow eyes leering at him, but there were no cracks in the wall, so he thought it must be his imagination. Larry was glad Barry was here though. He didn’t come around much. Larry might not see him for days or weeks until he’d turn up again, seemingly out of nowhere. But when Barry did show up, he was a lot of fun. He was Larry’s best friend.
He and Barry sat in silence for a while, contemplating the situation. Barry had appeared last night while Larry was asleep, waking him up suddenly. They talked for a while, then they’d heard the Creatures between the walls. They seemed excited, and they were screeching. Larry got a bit antsy and tried to make Barry leave, but he wouldn’t go for some reason. Then they discovered the Creatures had sealed up the doors, and there was no way out. Larry imagined them as vultures, circling their prey. He could hear little crows of delight coming from them as the scampered around the four walls in the room.
“There has to be a way to get out, Larry.” Barry had said. But he’d came up with nothing.
When they started to get hungry though, Barry had a brainwave.
“Lets break down the door.”
Larry and Barry hauled themselves up and walked towards where the door was.
It wasn’t there anymore.
All that remained was what looked like pillows fixed to it. Barry cursed the Creatures for what they had did and slumped disconsolately to the floor.
Larry didn’t like to see his best friend so depressed, so he put his mind to work thinking up a plan to escape past these Creatures.
After a few hours in which he mumbled, moaned, wept, pounded the floor in annoyance and cursed every god above the sun did he come up with a plan.
“I’ve got it, Barry!!” He yelled. “What we do is, I pound the walls and bait the creatures. You take off your shoes and hide in the corner, and when they come after me, you pound ‘em.”
Barry dried off his tears, meekly agreed and removed his footwear.
When Mr. Perkins delivered James Mattison his food ten minutes later he felt blind pity for the man. There he was, standing with no shoes on, hitting the walls with a tearstained face and yelling hoarsely for the “scum to come out from between the walls, because he knew they were there” and telling someone named Barry to be ready to “pound ‘em”.
Perkins sighed, muttered to himself and set the food tray down. Room 40 was the last in his floor. He left, closed the padded door, clocked out, and left the asylum.