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Recently my cousin, aged 20, passed away and some of us were asked to write a poem for him, i was one of the few asked.
I have wrote a couple of verses however i am stuck and i need some help. I am only 13 so dont mock my poem please. Only serious posts. It has no title so i could use some advice on that as well.
Seems like yesterday i was there beside you,
a blink of an eye and im here without you,,
sitting around i wondered what you were up to,
next thing you know tears are falling for you.
even though you're gone I feel you're right here next to me,
living without you must be hard for the family,
we're reminded of you from all of the things we see,
a room without you in it made it all feel so empty.
thats it so far.
I have wrote a couple of verses however i am stuck and i need some help. I am only 13 so dont mock my poem please. Only serious posts. It has no title so i could use some advice on that as well.
Seems like yesterday i was there beside you,
a blink of an eye and im here without you,,
sitting around i wondered what you were up to,
next thing you know tears are falling for you.
even though you're gone I feel you're right here next to me,
living without you must be hard for the family,
we're reminded of you from all of the things we see,
a room without you in it made it all feel so empty.
thats it so far.
My only suggestion for a title, is his name.
I can think of nothing better.
I can think of nothing better.
sorry to hear about your loss,
the poem is YOUR words for HIM, say what you have to say, it doesnt have to ryme, if you dont mind me sayin , try to have a few happy memorable parts in it
the poem is YOUR words for HIM, say what you have to say, it doesnt have to ryme, if you dont mind me sayin , try to have a few happy memorable parts in it
Sorry for your loss. I don't want to contribute any lines to your poem, I don't think that would be right, but I would suggest the following minor alteration:
"next thing you know our tears are falling for you"
For me it flowed better with this put in, but either way it sounds good. You certainly have some talent for a 13 year old.
Hang in there.
"next thing you know our tears are falling for you"
For me it flowed better with this put in, but either way it sounds good. You certainly have some talent for a 13 year old.
Hang in there.
I agree. Just write whatever comes to mind when you think of him. And remember that a poem does not need to rhyme, write exactly what you feel
Sorry to hear about it man.
I'd suggest you don't look for help with the poem though, let it all come from you, just do your best.
Sounds like you're doing well so far.
I'd suggest you don't look for help with the poem though, let it all come from you, just do your best.
Sounds like you're doing well so far.
Recently my cousin, aged 20, passed away and some of us were asked to write a poem for him, i was one of the few asked.
I have wrote a couple of verses however i am stuck and i need some help. I am only 13 so dont mock my poem please. Only serious posts. It has no title so i could use some advice on that as well.
Seems like yesterday i was there beside you,
a blink of an eye and im here without you,,
sitting around i wondered what you were up to,
next thing you know tears are falling for you.
even though you're gone I feel you're right here next to me,
living without you must be hard for the family,
we're reminded of you from all of the things we see,
a room without you in it made it all feel so empty.
thats it so far.
I have wrote a couple of verses however i am stuck and i need some help. I am only 13 so dont mock my poem please. Only serious posts. It has no title so i could use some advice on that as well.
Seems like yesterday i was there beside you,
a blink of an eye and im here without you,,
sitting around i wondered what you were up to,
next thing you know tears are falling for you.
even though you're gone I feel you're right here next to me,
living without you must be hard for the family,
we're reminded of you from all of the things we see,
a room without you in it made it all feel so empty.
thats it so far.