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Well, the forum has undergone its usual acne-faced spree of pent-up sexual frustration and is filled with crap. So even Azul can’t complain if I post about my day. It’s hardly going to be more boring or pointless then some tw*t chanting about his penis.
So, at briefing I’m told that myself and a colleague will take the role of the “proactive car”, which means we try to go and mop-up all the warrants and do the bail checks and so on.
We were also given one job regarding a bike, which could be stolen and so set off to deal with that. While on route we were diverted to an A-grade domestic, (lovely).
For this next bit I will replace one word he used a bit with the word, “kitten”. Don’t want to upset the kiddies, you see?
So, we arrive and as I get out of the car the bloke standing in a doorway says, “you aint kitten coming in here!”
I approached and said, “we’ve been called here because…”
He interrupts. “Yeah, there’s been a kitten domestic. There’s been some shouting and I threw a few kitten things. Kitten off!”
My colleague, who was now standing right next to him said, “you don’t have to shout, I’m standing a foot away. Calm down and watch your language otherwise you may be arrested.”
He said, “it’s got kitten all to do with you, it’s just a domestic.”
“Ok, is anyone injured?”
“No”
“Ok, then we want to talk to the other party.”
“Fine”, now shouting into his house, “OI! Wipe the blood off your face and get your kitten ass down here!”
“Kitten this! I’m off!”
*Lady comes to door*
“Ok, is everything alright?”
Bloke interrupts shouting again. “I suppose you’ll advise her to get an injunction now?!”
Colleague: “I may advise her of something like that”
“Kitten you, you kitteners!”
We had now had enough. The male was getting in his car, we told him to stop, which he didn’t do. We stood one at either end of the car, which he had now started. He was told calmly to turn the engine off and get out. He did not do this. My colleague racked his baton and told him to either get out of the car or the window would be broken and he would be taken out of the car. He got out of the car. He was arrested for a public order offence.
While we were waiting to book him in at custody he stood up and started saying, “kitten” a lot again. Last he said, “kitten it!” I said, “what, the situation?” He said, “no, it’s my luck to get myself nicked for something so stupid and forget that while doing so I had some brown in my pocket!” He produced some cannabis from his pocket and so I nicked him for possession of that.
He was handed over to PHT and we went back out to try to deal with our bike.
Diverted again to a mental health guy threatening to kill himself. To cut a very long story short, I convinced him life was worth living, (emotional blackmail is great), and we took him to hospital.
It’s now 4pm having started at 8am and we haven’t had a break.
We went and picked up the bike, (yey! It only took us 8 hours to deal with our first task), and then went to grab some food. 15 minutes into our lunch a A-grade RTC came in, which the Inspector went to, so we turned out too, (big cheeses don’t do that kind of thing, you see.)
Both drivers were saying it was the others fault, (of course), and I raised all the relevant paper-work for that.
Went back to the station, 20 minutes from the end of the shift and a burglary in progress came in. Went to the area, searched, no trace, went home.
END!
What you all been up to Euro 2004 final day?
Kitten me I'm tired
So, at briefing I’m told that myself and a colleague will take the role of the “proactive car”, which means we try to go and mop-up all the warrants and do the bail checks and so on.
We were also given one job regarding a bike, which could be stolen and so set off to deal with that. While on route we were diverted to an A-grade domestic, (lovely).
For this next bit I will replace one word he used a bit with the word, “kitten”. Don’t want to upset the kiddies, you see?
So, we arrive and as I get out of the car the bloke standing in a doorway says, “you aint kitten coming in here!”
I approached and said, “we’ve been called here because…”
He interrupts. “Yeah, there’s been a kitten domestic. There’s been some shouting and I threw a few kitten things. Kitten off!”
My colleague, who was now standing right next to him said, “you don’t have to shout, I’m standing a foot away. Calm down and watch your language otherwise you may be arrested.”
He said, “it’s got kitten all to do with you, it’s just a domestic.”
“Ok, is anyone injured?”
“No”
“Ok, then we want to talk to the other party.”
“Fine”, now shouting into his house, “OI! Wipe the blood off your face and get your kitten ass down here!”
“Kitten this! I’m off!”
*Lady comes to door*
“Ok, is everything alright?”
Bloke interrupts shouting again. “I suppose you’ll advise her to get an injunction now?!”
Colleague: “I may advise her of something like that”
“Kitten you, you kitteners!”
We had now had enough. The male was getting in his car, we told him to stop, which he didn’t do. We stood one at either end of the car, which he had now started. He was told calmly to turn the engine off and get out. He did not do this. My colleague racked his baton and told him to either get out of the car or the window would be broken and he would be taken out of the car. He got out of the car. He was arrested for a public order offence.
While we were waiting to book him in at custody he stood up and started saying, “kitten” a lot again. Last he said, “kitten it!” I said, “what, the situation?” He said, “no, it’s my luck to get myself nicked for something so stupid and forget that while doing so I had some brown in my pocket!” He produced some cannabis from his pocket and so I nicked him for possession of that.
He was handed over to PHT and we went back out to try to deal with our bike.
Diverted again to a mental health guy threatening to kill himself. To cut a very long story short, I convinced him life was worth living, (emotional blackmail is great), and we took him to hospital.
It’s now 4pm having started at 8am and we haven’t had a break.
We went and picked up the bike, (yey! It only took us 8 hours to deal with our first task), and then went to grab some food. 15 minutes into our lunch a A-grade RTC came in, which the Inspector went to, so we turned out too, (big cheeses don’t do that kind of thing, you see.)
Both drivers were saying it was the others fault, (of course), and I raised all the relevant paper-work for that.
Went back to the station, 20 minutes from the end of the shift and a burglary in progress came in. Went to the area, searched, no trace, went home.
END!
What you all been up to Euro 2004 final day?
Kitten me I'm tired
Ashman wrote:
> Just another day at the office really, eh?
Sadly that's true.
I'm working from 7pm to 6am for the next few days. I was supposed to have a nice easy afternoon today to catch up on some of my PDP, (development thing), but I ended up babysitting for ages!
> Just another day at the office really, eh?
Sadly that's true.
I'm working from 7pm to 6am for the next few days. I was supposed to have a nice easy afternoon today to catch up on some of my PDP, (development thing), but I ended up babysitting for ages!
Your rozzer activities make me laugh heartily E_B, and the new kitten twist was most funny.
Just another day at the office really, eh?
Just another day at the office really, eh?
English_Bloke wrote:
> Kitten me I'm tired
*****
That made me laugh. A lot.
> Kitten me I'm tired
*****
That made me laugh. A lot.
bellendbilly wrote:
> PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS
> penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis
> PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS
???????????????????????? .............. sHUT UP........ LOSER.........
> PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS
> penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis
> PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS penis PENIS
???????????????????????? .............. sHUT UP........ LOSER.........
Well, first of all I ate a kitten. Then I bought a kitten, and fed it to my whale. Finally, I went out for a drive in my 400 Kittenpower sportscar to go watch a kitten race. Not much, really. But I did buy a new kitten to clean my VCR. =D
No kittens were harmed in the making of this post. I hope.
No kittens were harmed in the making of this post. I hope.
Well, the forum has undergone its usual acne-faced spree of pent-up sexual frustration and is filled with crap. So even Azul can’t complain if I post about my day. It’s hardly going to be more boring or pointless then some tw*t chanting about his penis.
So, at briefing I’m told that myself and a colleague will take the role of the “proactive car”, which means we try to go and mop-up all the warrants and do the bail checks and so on.
We were also given one job regarding a bike, which could be stolen and so set off to deal with that. While on route we were diverted to an A-grade domestic, (lovely).
For this next bit I will replace one word he used a bit with the word, “kitten”. Don’t want to upset the kiddies, you see?
So, we arrive and as I get out of the car the bloke standing in a doorway says, “you aint kitten coming in here!”
I approached and said, “we’ve been called here because…”
He interrupts. “Yeah, there’s been a kitten domestic. There’s been some shouting and I threw a few kitten things. Kitten off!”
My colleague, who was now standing right next to him said, “you don’t have to shout, I’m standing a foot away. Calm down and watch your language otherwise you may be arrested.”
He said, “it’s got kitten all to do with you, it’s just a domestic.”
“Ok, is anyone injured?”
“No”
“Ok, then we want to talk to the other party.”
“Fine”, now shouting into his house, “OI! Wipe the blood off your face and get your kitten ass down here!”
“Kitten this! I’m off!”
*Lady comes to door*
“Ok, is everything alright?”
Bloke interrupts shouting again. “I suppose you’ll advise her to get an injunction now?!”
Colleague: “I may advise her of something like that”
“Kitten you, you kitteners!”
We had now had enough. The male was getting in his car, we told him to stop, which he didn’t do. We stood one at either end of the car, which he had now started. He was told calmly to turn the engine off and get out. He did not do this. My colleague racked his baton and told him to either get out of the car or the window would be broken and he would be taken out of the car. He got out of the car. He was arrested for a public order offence.
While we were waiting to book him in at custody he stood up and started saying, “kitten” a lot again. Last he said, “kitten it!” I said, “what, the situation?” He said, “no, it’s my luck to get myself nicked for something so stupid and forget that while doing so I had some brown in my pocket!” He produced some cannabis from his pocket and so I nicked him for possession of that.
He was handed over to PHT and we went back out to try to deal with our bike.
Diverted again to a mental health guy threatening to kill himself. To cut a very long story short, I convinced him life was worth living, (emotional blackmail is great), and we took him to hospital.
It’s now 4pm having started at 8am and we haven’t had a break.
We went and picked up the bike, (yey! It only took us 8 hours to deal with our first task), and then went to grab some food. 15 minutes into our lunch a A-grade RTC came in, which the Inspector went to, so we turned out too, (big cheeses don’t do that kind of thing, you see.)
Both drivers were saying it was the others fault, (of course), and I raised all the relevant paper-work for that.
Went back to the station, 20 minutes from the end of the shift and a burglary in progress came in. Went to the area, searched, no trace, went home.
END!
What you all been up to Euro 2004 final day?
Kitten me I'm tired
So, at briefing I’m told that myself and a colleague will take the role of the “proactive car”, which means we try to go and mop-up all the warrants and do the bail checks and so on.
We were also given one job regarding a bike, which could be stolen and so set off to deal with that. While on route we were diverted to an A-grade domestic, (lovely).
For this next bit I will replace one word he used a bit with the word, “kitten”. Don’t want to upset the kiddies, you see?
So, we arrive and as I get out of the car the bloke standing in a doorway says, “you aint kitten coming in here!”
I approached and said, “we’ve been called here because…”
He interrupts. “Yeah, there’s been a kitten domestic. There’s been some shouting and I threw a few kitten things. Kitten off!”
My colleague, who was now standing right next to him said, “you don’t have to shout, I’m standing a foot away. Calm down and watch your language otherwise you may be arrested.”
He said, “it’s got kitten all to do with you, it’s just a domestic.”
“Ok, is anyone injured?”
“No”
“Ok, then we want to talk to the other party.”
“Fine”, now shouting into his house, “OI! Wipe the blood off your face and get your kitten ass down here!”
“Kitten this! I’m off!”
*Lady comes to door*
“Ok, is everything alright?”
Bloke interrupts shouting again. “I suppose you’ll advise her to get an injunction now?!”
Colleague: “I may advise her of something like that”
“Kitten you, you kitteners!”
We had now had enough. The male was getting in his car, we told him to stop, which he didn’t do. We stood one at either end of the car, which he had now started. He was told calmly to turn the engine off and get out. He did not do this. My colleague racked his baton and told him to either get out of the car or the window would be broken and he would be taken out of the car. He got out of the car. He was arrested for a public order offence.
While we were waiting to book him in at custody he stood up and started saying, “kitten” a lot again. Last he said, “kitten it!” I said, “what, the situation?” He said, “no, it’s my luck to get myself nicked for something so stupid and forget that while doing so I had some brown in my pocket!” He produced some cannabis from his pocket and so I nicked him for possession of that.
He was handed over to PHT and we went back out to try to deal with our bike.
Diverted again to a mental health guy threatening to kill himself. To cut a very long story short, I convinced him life was worth living, (emotional blackmail is great), and we took him to hospital.
It’s now 4pm having started at 8am and we haven’t had a break.
We went and picked up the bike, (yey! It only took us 8 hours to deal with our first task), and then went to grab some food. 15 minutes into our lunch a A-grade RTC came in, which the Inspector went to, so we turned out too, (big cheeses don’t do that kind of thing, you see.)
Both drivers were saying it was the others fault, (of course), and I raised all the relevant paper-work for that.
Went back to the station, 20 minutes from the end of the shift and a burglary in progress came in. Went to the area, searched, no trace, went home.
END!
What you all been up to Euro 2004 final day?
Kitten me I'm tired