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The thing about having two sweet little girls, is that they do sweet little girl things.
They like pretty things, and princesses. They like to share these things with me.
Yesterday - actually, it's late, the day before - Friday. So on Friday, Malibu and Georgia were bought some stickers. Georgia had some 'Little Mermaid' ones, Malibu had a bunch of different hearts.
Georgia kindly stuck a sticker of the little mermaid and her mad friend on my t-shirt. Thinking this was a good idea, Malibu presented me with a number of little hearts.
Anyway, time passed, as so so frequently does, the girls went to bed, and I popped out to get a few things - petrol, DVD, snacks.
It wasn't until I got back that I realised I was still covered in hearts and little mermaids.
No wonder I got such funny looks.
They like pretty things, and princesses. They like to share these things with me.
Yesterday - actually, it's late, the day before - Friday. So on Friday, Malibu and Georgia were bought some stickers. Georgia had some 'Little Mermaid' ones, Malibu had a bunch of different hearts.
Georgia kindly stuck a sticker of the little mermaid and her mad friend on my t-shirt. Thinking this was a good idea, Malibu presented me with a number of little hearts.
Anyway, time passed, as so so frequently does, the girls went to bed, and I popped out to get a few things - petrol, DVD, snacks.
It wasn't until I got back that I realised I was still covered in hearts and little mermaids.
No wonder I got such funny looks.
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The thing about having two sweet little girls, is that they do sweet little girl things.
They like pretty things, and princesses. They like to share these things with me.
Yesterday - actually, it's late, the day before - Friday. So on Friday, Malibu and Georgia were bought some stickers. Georgia had some 'Little Mermaid' ones, Malibu had a bunch of different hearts.
Georgia kindly stuck a sticker of the little mermaid and her mad friend on my t-shirt. Thinking this was a good idea, Malibu presented me with a number of little hearts.
Anyway, time passed, as so so frequently does, the girls went to bed, and I popped out to get a few things - petrol, DVD, snacks.
It wasn't until I got back that I realised I was still covered in hearts and little mermaids.
No wonder I got such funny looks.
They like pretty things, and princesses. They like to share these things with me.
Yesterday - actually, it's late, the day before - Friday. So on Friday, Malibu and Georgia were bought some stickers. Georgia had some 'Little Mermaid' ones, Malibu had a bunch of different hearts.
Georgia kindly stuck a sticker of the little mermaid and her mad friend on my t-shirt. Thinking this was a good idea, Malibu presented me with a number of little hearts.
Anyway, time passed, as so so frequently does, the girls went to bed, and I popped out to get a few things - petrol, DVD, snacks.
It wasn't until I got back that I realised I was still covered in hearts and little mermaids.
No wonder I got such funny looks.
You should give your kids more pocket money. They deserve it.
Aahhaha.
I would've paid to see that. Muchly.
Bah, I blame the tiredness
I would've paid to see that. Muchly.
Bah, I blame the tiredness
The common phrase is paid to *see* that, not say.
Anyway, an almost appropriate joke would be:
God created the mule, and told him,
"You will be mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and lack intelligence. You will live for 50 years."
The mule answered, "To live like this for 50 years is too much. Please, give me no more than 20." And it was so.
Then God created the dog, and told him, "You will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat his table scraps and live for 25 years."
And the dog responded, "Lord, to live 25 years as a dog like that is too much. Please, no more than 10 years." And it was so.
God then created the monkey, and told him, "You are monkey. You shall swing from tree to tree, acting like an idiot. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20 years."
And the monkey responded, "Lord, to live 20 years as the clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than 10 years." And it was so.
Finally, God created Man and told him, "You are Man, the only rational being that walks the earth. You will use your intelligence to have mastery over the creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and live for 20 years."
And the man responded, "Lord, to be Man for only 20 years is too little. Please, Lord, give me the 30 years the mule refused, the 15 years the dog refused, and the 10 years the monkey rejected." And it was so.
And so God made Man to live 20 years as a man, then marry and live 30 years like a mule working and carrying heavy loads on his back. Then, he is to have children and live 15 years as a dog, guarding his house and eating the leftovers after they empty the pantry; then, in his old age, to live 10 years as a monkey, acting like an idiot to amuse his grand children.
Anyway, an almost appropriate joke would be:
God created the mule, and told him,
"You will be mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and lack intelligence. You will live for 50 years."
The mule answered, "To live like this for 50 years is too much. Please, give me no more than 20." And it was so.
Then God created the dog, and told him, "You will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to whom you will be his greatest companion. You will eat his table scraps and live for 25 years."
And the dog responded, "Lord, to live 25 years as a dog like that is too much. Please, no more than 10 years." And it was so.
God then created the monkey, and told him, "You are monkey. You shall swing from tree to tree, acting like an idiot. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20 years."
And the monkey responded, "Lord, to live 20 years as the clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, give me no more than 10 years." And it was so.
Finally, God created Man and told him, "You are Man, the only rational being that walks the earth. You will use your intelligence to have mastery over the creatures of the world. You will dominate the earth and live for 20 years."
And the man responded, "Lord, to be Man for only 20 years is too little. Please, Lord, give me the 30 years the mule refused, the 15 years the dog refused, and the 10 years the monkey rejected." And it was so.
And so God made Man to live 20 years as a man, then marry and live 30 years like a mule working and carrying heavy loads on his back. Then, he is to have children and live 15 years as a dog, guarding his house and eating the leftovers after they empty the pantry; then, in his old age, to live 10 years as a monkey, acting like an idiot to amuse his grand children.
Long live parenthood.
Heh, I enjoyed both little pieces muchly.
bellendbilly wrote:
> Ashman wrote:
> Heh, I enjoyed both little pieces muchly.
>
> OMG PEADOFILE
> THATS DISGUSTIN
Perhaps you should take deeper breaths, your brain appears starved of oxygen.
> Ashman wrote:
> Heh, I enjoyed both little pieces muchly.
>
> OMG PEADOFILE
> THATS DISGUSTIN
Perhaps you should take deeper breaths, your brain appears starved of oxygen.
bellendbilly wrote:
> OMG PEADOFILE
> THATS DISGUSTIN
AHAH :D:D:D
Billy, however much you spam, however much you annoy certain members, I love you.
> OMG PEADOFILE
> THATS DISGUSTIN
AHAH :D:D:D
Billy, however much you spam, however much you annoy certain members, I love you.
mattributé wrote:
> bellendbilly wrote:
> OMG PEADOFILE
> THATS DISGUSTIN
>
> AHAH :D:D:D
>
> Billy, however much you spam, however much you annoy certain members,
> I love you.
OMG!!! ItS sO oBvIoUs, BiLlY iS TrIbUtE!!!
> bellendbilly wrote:
> OMG PEADOFILE
> THATS DISGUSTIN
>
> AHAH :D:D:D
>
> Billy, however much you spam, however much you annoy certain members,
> I love you.
OMG!!! ItS sO oBvIoUs, BiLlY iS TrIbUtE!!!
What Mattio said! :-D
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