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I’ve been thinking about it for a long time now. You may have noticed the lack of posts about my job. No jovial fun about my wacky adventures, and this is because for the last 8 months I’ve been miserable. I’m not going to go into all the details about why I’ve felt so bad at work, but it got so bad that I could no longer sleep properly the night prior to a shift. 2 hours was my maximum and then I’d then wake up dreading going in. Finishing my final shift of each set would just be such a huge relief before the dread of the next set would begin.
I've spent the last 8 months trying to convince myself to stay a little longer because I may change my way of feeling, but the reasons that kept me going were not the same that I entered on. I didn’t want to give up. I didn’t want to disappoint my parents who have supported me a lot in my application and I now have money obligations.
Slowly I have felt worse and worse over time and my work has started to suffer. I’m a good cop on the street and have been told this a lot, but it’s all the other parts that suffered. This hasn’t just affected me but other people too and this is the one thing that I regret.
I finally accepted to myself and my Sgt just how miserable I was yesterday. It was a huge relief to finally let it all out. I handed in my resignation this morning and it felt like a huge weight had been lifted from me.
I feel quite odd at the moment because I have no idea what I’m going to be doing now. There were a few other idea’s floating about my head when I joined. These being either the Fire Service or being a fitness instructor, but I have no idea at the moment about if this is something I’m going to persue. Right now I just think I need to take a little time to decide what I want and let no other factors other then that make my decision.
I wouldn’t take my time back that I spent in the police, because I’ve seen and got to do a lot in the last year and a half that some people don’t get to do all their lives. I’ve had some excellent training opportunities and police officer on the CV can be very helpful. Not only this but I’ve also grown up a lot during my time in. I’m much more cynical then when I joined and I think I’m a little more sarcastic too, but I’ve matured. I now know that money isn’t everything in a job, because I was on a very good wage for my age.
No real point to this post, but I’ve typed it in about 5 minutes as a way of venting, so sorry if it’s jumbled or makes no sense.
So yeah, R.I.P PC English_Bloke
Oh and one more thing. During a slightly emotional goodbye with some colleagues while trying to be serious and thank them for support and such a bird shat on my head. Just though some of you sick bashtards would want to know that.
Does this mean I've got to put the kettle on for Trish, Grix and you?
all the best to you E_B, you seem like a cool enough guy and you've got your head screwed on so i'm sure you've made the right choice for youself.
all jobs have slumps, but if you're really not happy then getting out is the best thing to do and you're only 20, LOADS of time to find what you want to do if you don't mind treading water for a while.
all that remains is to say yes, the birt shatting on you was indeed hilarious and also... does that mean that car's on the market now? :)
good luck mate.
Well done etc etc yada for making the call, you're stil, young so can try whatever you want really.
Oh and the bird made me kinda of burst out laughing which usually doesn't happen... I usually have build up to it.
Ineedsleep wrote:
> Enjoy the break from the daily grind and I hope the next thing you
> try your hand at gives you more pleasure.
It did. Thanks ;)
Enjoy the break from the daily grind and I hope the next thing you try your hand at gives you more pleasure.
Take your time. I guess finding out how much you hate doing something will help you eventually find something you enjoy doing.
Would you want to stay on the street in some sort of exciting job, or would you prefer to be behind desks and paper etc?
On a side note I don't think you've let anyone down, especially not yourself. At least, that's what Dr Phil tells me.
My advice to you would be to take a loooong holiday. All the best, chin up, and other tediously inevitable and sincerely meant sentiments.
good luck with what ever you choose to do next :D