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"Best Fart Ever"

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Wed 13/08/03 at 21:58
Regular
Posts: 787
This should be interesting in a smelly way.

Firstly, I declare myself the proud owner of the best fart ever already, but what's the best fart you've ever done. And don't try to be 'hard' and lie.

On an aeroplane, coming back from Turkey on Monday. I'd eaten something that my stomach didn't like a few days earlier and I was starting to feel ill from holding all the farts in. I decided to let a small one go to see if it would be safe to let the whole lot go.

Leaning to the side I let a little one go, but I got carried away and let rip a rather beefy fart, luckily the noise of the aeroplane covered the sound.

Upon smelling the fart, I decided to hide myself so I stuck my head in my bag on the floor and just listened to the 'urgh' noises coming from further and further down the aisle.

Within the paranoia of hoping nobody knew it was me was a sense of acheivement.

Plus it was quite amusing the fact that the toilet was behind me and everyone looked at the poor bloke walking out of it once the smell had filled the whole plane!

So, your best farts?

My sister's fart about 5 years ago in a lift was pretty good too. Especially my Dad having to explain to the people getting on that it was my sister who did it!
Wed 13/08/03 at 23:23
Regular
Posts: 20,776
MoJoJoJo wrote:
> He's the ass master.

heh

I tell you, I went to a turkish kebab house and had the best darn chicken and shish kebab man had ever seen.

they really had the BEST garnish and salad too, including clumps of shredded cabbage, whole pickled jalapeno chillies, carrot, and the usual lettuce and tomatos.

god it was nice. I was eating the remnants with a spoon it was that good.

anyway, long story short, the next day when I let one rip it felt like the fumes from a volcano were leaving my ass. when I later went for a number 2 I had severe stinging sensations and had to wash my ass with some wet tissue to ensure no chilli oils would remain.

hope no-one was eating while reading that :D
Wed 13/08/03 at 23:17
Posts: 11,652
No im sorry, no one can beat me at farting.
Im relying on it as like a backup job when i flunk school.
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:55
Regular
"Remember me?"
Posts: 6,124
Thank you. It's gonna be my major.
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:55
Regular
"Twenty quid."
Posts: 11,452
Dark Mark™ wrote:
> The best farts are ones with multiple notes. For example, the one my
> brother did once that was a loud "phrrrrrrrrrrrrrp!"
> followed by quieter "pheep, pheep".

What a brilliant description!
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:55
Regular
"Remember me?"
Posts: 6,124
Timmargh wrote:
> I just farted! It wasn't particularly good but it did make the dog sit
> up and look.
>
> :-D

*

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:54
Regular
"Remember me?"
Posts: 6,124
The best farts are ones with multiple notes. For example, the one my brother did once that was a loud "phrrrrrrrrrrrrrp!" followed by quieter "pheep, pheep".
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:52
Regular
"That's right!"
Posts: 10,645
Don't fart as much as I used to when I was a kid, but, boy, have I done some stinkers in my time! Italian food gets me the worst - I'll be farting all day and they're so bad even I have to try and waft them off (you know it's bad when even you can't stand it)

Oh, and beer, usually Fosters or Bud has me farting every five minutes. Not nice when you're in a small room watching TV with a load of mates. It doesn't impress the girls...

My mate farts all the time. He's the ass master.
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:52
Regular
"I like cheese"
Posts: 16,918
phi11ip wrote:
> Upon smelling the fart, I decided to hide myself so I stuck my head
> in my bag on the floor and just listened to the 'urgh' noises coming
> from further and further down the aisle.

ROFL!!

Brilliant. :D
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:49
Regular
"Twenty quid."
Posts: 11,452
I just farted! It wasn't particularly good but it did make the dog sit up and look.

:-D
Wed 13/08/03 at 22:11
Regular
"\\"
Posts: 9,631
Timmargh wrote:
> Another friend of mine (I have two!)

:D

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