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Yeah, so last night I was just settling into bed at 2am when the phone rang. I knew it would be for me, and I was sure it was my mate Jay, since he was stupid enough to phone my house at 2 in the morning on Sunday night. My house has five phones, one of which is in my parent's room. They weren't amused when my friend Jay woke them up.
Anyway, it was The Wal this time, sounded pretty drunk. He was on his mobile so he made me call him back. Anyway, he'd just been at an ASDA party (the people who work at ASDA are always holding parties, and our mate Seb works there so sometimes we go along) at somebody's house around the corner from mine.
He'd been there with Seb, and while trying unsuccessfully to pull this bird (who I think is gay anyway) he kept having run ins with this cocky kid. Later on, The Wal was getting his beers out of the fridge, and saw some vodka chocolate things (um... I guess vodka with chocolate, or chocolate with vodka, I don't know)
He pulled them out and said "Oh, whose are these?" Cocky Kid said "20 seconds to put them down or I'll knock you out." Wal held them up, and started counting. By the time he got to 14, Cocky Kid grabbed him by the neck. So Wal hit him. Then again. And again. And again. He battered him all over the utility room, busted his nose and mouth open and there was blood all across the walls. Still the kid kept coming, throwing wild punches. Still The Wal kept hammering him, until he went down. Then Wal hit him while he was down, to make sure he stayed down. Cocky Kid's friend didn't do anything while this happened. I think Wal ended up throwing Cocky Kid outside.
Everybody goes up to The Wal "Hey, well done, that kid was a right dick," and "Oh, you must be a boxer." Then somebody said "He's getting back up," so Wal said "I'll go and knock him back down, then."
Anyway, by this time somebody had called the police (probably cocky kid or his friend) so The Wal hopped over a fence and left. Just another typical day in the life of The Wal.
Anyway, so this thread isn't a complete waste of space, when was the last time you saw a fight at a party, or when was the last time YOU were in a fight at a party? Who won? What happened? Did somebody get their face stamped on? I want all the bloody details.
I know you think I'm being sarcastic but I genuinely do enjoy reading this tales.
It's like some Geordie Fight Club thing.
Beer them up and send them on missions of fighty kickpunch
Ironically enough, this kid who got lashed all over so easily works at ASDA... as part of security. Wal knows who he is and where he works. I believe he has a higher chance of having his own legs broken. What a moron.
> I called her a leper once
>
> She didn't like that, I thought it was funny.
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Smooth :) My lady friend is ignoring me at the moment because I didn't invite her to see Pirates of the Caribbean tommorrow. Pish, serves her right for not calling me to check if I was going. Now I can remark that Kiera Knightley is fit to my mates without getting slapped.
She didn't like that, I thought it was funny.
No fights nope. Everyone likes me, think I'm off to big party tonight but the lady friend is working and in bad mood with me I think.
When I was in a band at sixth form we all gave ourselves jazz names. I was Lucas Badoa and Ali was Ali Badeli. My mate's Dave and Ben were Danbrisco Bennoni and Benjamin Zeffenia. The band was called Doctor Monkey and we rocked!!!
But no, I've never been in a fight. Or seen one for that matter.