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"I'm a vegetarian and the only meat that enters my mouth, leaves happy and has a heartbeat" ...Pamela Anderson
"You can always pick your friends, but you cannot pick your friend's nose"...Groucho Marx
"Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough"...Groucho Marx
"Have you got a light, mac? No, but I've got a dark brown overcoat!"...Vivian Stanshall
Just a few, do you have any...?
"I'm a vegetarian and the only meat that enters my mouth, leaves happy and has a heartbeat" ...Pamela Anderson
"You can always pick your friends, but you cannot pick your friend's nose"...Groucho Marx
"Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough"...Groucho Marx
"Have you got a light, mac? No, but I've got a dark brown overcoat!"...Vivian Stanshall
Just a few, do you have any...?
"you aim to please, i shoot to kill"
theres probably others but those are ones i like.
[S]They’re also numerous family guy quotes.
> Not all toffs are Tory’s, but all Tory’s are toffs (by some
> political pundit I can’t remember). Or there is the even less
> politically correct version by Roy ‘chubby’ Brown; I’m not saying
> that all Muslims are terrorists, but it’s funny how all
> terrorists are Muslim.
>
> [S]They’re also numerous
> family guy
> quotes.
"You just open your mouth and let the wind blow your tongue"
Classic that one:)
Funny how Kelloggs never used this in their adverts !.
> Crunchy Nut Cornflakes are just Frosties for w*****s - Jez from
> Peep Show.
Ah peep show, proving we all have a witty inner voice, even if it manifests itself as an incoherent rant to rival Jeremy Clarkson's.
Also dragonlance (or anyone), I’ve never worked out what is meant by purely quoting someone, could you please enlighten me?
"Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months"
"Wickedness is a myth invented by good people to account for the curious attractivness of others"
Two funny:
"So finally justice is served. Well, not actual justice, just what I wanted. Which is basically the same thing" - Jeremy/Peep Show
[B][CODE]Jeremy Osborne: Ah, you see! He did do it, but for a nice reason. Who's the racist now, Mark?
Mark Corrigan: [on telephone] Er, Sophie. If you heard that, please ignore it. I'm not a racist. Far from it. Anyway... it's good to hear your voice. I know it's only a recording but you have got a bloody nice voice and...
[laughs lamely]
Mark Corrigan: God, I just called up to say hi and then...
[singing]
Mark Corrigan: Then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like... I like you. I mean, not that. But anyway... I noticed that the paper in the photocopier is running a bit low so... I know it's not really your job but... You know, so... see you tomorrow.
[puts the telephone down]
Mark Corrigan: F***, f***, f***, f***!
Jeremy Osborne: Oh, f***!
Mark Corrigan: Oh, my God.
Jeremy Osborne: Jesus!
Mark Corrigan: I've really f***ed it. Have I f***ed it?
- Maybe the best few lines in television history.
"Eat healthy, exercise daily, die anyway" - don't know who gave this gem, but so true for the health fanatics...
"80% of married men cheat in America, the other 20% cheat in Europe" - Jackie Mason
And have to drop in one of my one-liners here...
If a fire hydrant has H2O on the inside, what does it have on the outside? K9P.
EDIT: Wishes that the Small formatting was actually in subscript rather than superscript...
> pete_21 wrote:
> Crunchy Nut Cornflakes are just Frosties for w*****s - Jez from
> Peep Show.
>
> Ah peep show, proving we all have a witty inner voice, even if
> it manifests itself as an incoherent rant to rival Jeremy
> Clarkson's.
>
> Also dragonlance (or anyone), I’ve never worked out what is
> meant by purely quoting someone, could you please enlighten
> me?
I'll have a go - for me a quote is a saying or phrase uttered by someone to describe someone, something or whatever, but it just descibes the 'action' exactly and you often wonder "Why didn't I say that!"