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Me and mate were talking after watching little kids play Jerry Springer outside my place, and we came to a startling realisation.
TV for kids is rubbish these days.
Those 20+ will remember when I start to talk, and those of you that don’t remember owe it to yourself to try and watch the DVDs so you’ll understand.
There are no action series for kids anymore. And this is why you are now a generation of delinquents and slack-jawed tv babies.
When I were a lad, many hours would be spent playing outside with my mates, we didn’t have computer games back then you see. Oh no, we made our own fun up.
And we had class tv shows to base our fantasy play on.
I’m going to throw a few names out and see who goes “Oh yeah! I forgot about that!”.
Knight Rider – David Hasslehoff, a talking car and Hasslehoff also playing evil twin Hasslehoff. This was a class show, with his car foiling crimes and him generally standing about looking manly and white-afro.
Manimal – Simon McCorkindale was a bloke that had the ability to morph into animals when needed. This usually entailed him turning into a chicken or ferret or equally useless animal. Used a lot of stock footage of nature programmes.
Automan – The only bit I remember is his car that turned right-angles at 120mph.
Tales of The Golden Monkey – a 1940s thing with a bloke in a seaplane searching for treasure, usually getting into adventures utilising a seaplane.
Monkey – Monkey, Pigsy, Tripitaka and Sandy. Chinese kung-fu series with Monkey flying on a pink cloud and using his stick in mad ways. Tripitake was a boy. Or a girl? I could never tell. This programme ruled and survives to this day.
The A-Team – If I need to tell you about this, you are a newborn.
CHIPS – LAPD Motorcycle cop show with Erik Estrada and the other bloke. They rocked, and many mates rode together on their choppers with cards in the spokes.
Magnum – Tom Selleck as Magnum PI. A detective series on Hawaii with ferraris, Higgins and his dobermans Zeus and Apollo. One of the greats.
The Fall Guy – Lee Majors as a stunt-man turned bounty-hunter. And though he’s not the kind to kiss or tell, he’s been seen with ladies. It’s true they hide his body in the hay. A-hey-hey. He might fall from tall building, or trash a brand new car, ‘cos he’s the unknown stuntman that made Eastwood such a star.
Airwolf – Stealth helicopter series with Jan Michael-Vincent and Ernest Borgnine. This was better than Blue Thunder, as proved in Log in The Creek Episode 5
BJ and The Bear – Only I remember this it would seem. The adventures of a long-distance lorry driver and his chimpanzee side-kick. My cat is called BJ in honour of this show.
Buck Rogers – Gil Gerard and his paunch, stuffed into a white silk jumpsuit. He would foil space-villains with the assistance of Twiki (biddy-biddy-biddy) and a woman.
---
These shows rocked, and there is nothing like them on today. Where are the action series aimed at kids? You are not learning the difference between right & wrong with action heroes. I think if we still had episodic, hour-long action shows then this world would be a better place altogether.
TV for kids is rubbish these days.
Those 20+ will remember when I start to talk, and those of you that don’t remember owe it to yourself to try and watch the DVDs so you’ll understand.
There are no action series for kids anymore. And this is why you are now a generation of delinquents and slack-jawed tv babies.
When I were a lad, many hours would be spent playing outside with my mates, we didn’t have computer games back then you see. Oh no, we made our own fun up.
And we had class tv shows to base our fantasy play on.
I’m going to throw a few names out and see who goes “Oh yeah! I forgot about that!”.
Knight Rider – David Hasslehoff, a talking car and Hasslehoff also playing evil twin Hasslehoff. This was a class show, with his car foiling crimes and him generally standing about looking manly and white-afro.
Manimal – Simon McCorkindale was a bloke that had the ability to morph into animals when needed. This usually entailed him turning into a chicken or ferret or equally useless animal. Used a lot of stock footage of nature programmes.
Automan – The only bit I remember is his car that turned right-angles at 120mph.
Tales of The Golden Monkey – a 1940s thing with a bloke in a seaplane searching for treasure, usually getting into adventures utilising a seaplane.
Monkey – Monkey, Pigsy, Tripitaka and Sandy. Chinese kung-fu series with Monkey flying on a pink cloud and using his stick in mad ways. Tripitake was a boy. Or a girl? I could never tell. This programme ruled and survives to this day.
The A-Team – If I need to tell you about this, you are a newborn.
CHIPS – LAPD Motorcycle cop show with Erik Estrada and the other bloke. They rocked, and many mates rode together on their choppers with cards in the spokes.
Magnum – Tom Selleck as Magnum PI. A detective series on Hawaii with ferraris, Higgins and his dobermans Zeus and Apollo. One of the greats.
The Fall Guy – Lee Majors as a stunt-man turned bounty-hunter. And though he’s not the kind to kiss or tell, he’s been seen with ladies. It’s true they hide his body in the hay. A-hey-hey. He might fall from tall building, or trash a brand new car, ‘cos he’s the unknown stuntman that made Eastwood such a star.
Airwolf – Stealth helicopter series with Jan Michael-Vincent and Ernest Borgnine. This was better than Blue Thunder, as proved in Log in The Creek Episode 5
BJ and The Bear – Only I remember this it would seem. The adventures of a long-distance lorry driver and his chimpanzee side-kick. My cat is called BJ in honour of this show.
Buck Rogers – Gil Gerard and his paunch, stuffed into a white silk jumpsuit. He would foil space-villains with the assistance of Twiki (biddy-biddy-biddy) and a woman.
---
These shows rocked, and there is nothing like them on today. Where are the action series aimed at kids? You are not learning the difference between right & wrong with action heroes. I think if we still had episodic, hour-long action shows then this world would be a better place altogether.
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(wrong but this is what I remember of it)
In 197(?) a crack commando unit was convicted of a crime they did not commit.
They promptly escaped from a maximum security penitentiary and hid in the Los Angeles underground, where they exist today.
If you have a problem, if no-one else can help and if you can find them...maybe you could hire:
The A-Team.
*machine gun fire spells out the name*
Da-da-da-daaaaaa da-da-daaaaaa
---
Happy memories.
And Mr T telling us to respect each other, stay in school, not tell lies and to stick up for little kids getting picked on.
In 197(?) a crack commando unit was convicted of a crime they did not commit.
They promptly escaped from a maximum security penitentiary and hid in the Los Angeles underground, where they exist today.
If you have a problem, if no-one else can help and if you can find them...maybe you could hire:
The A-Team.
*machine gun fire spells out the name*
Da-da-da-daaaaaa da-da-daaaaaa
---
Happy memories.
And Mr T telling us to respect each other, stay in school, not tell lies and to stick up for little kids getting picked on.
Goatboy wrote:
McGyver just seemed to jump on the
> bandwagon, but lacked the decent theme-tune, cool disguises and Mr T.
The McGyver theme tune was pretty good, but the yes, the programme was no A-Team.
McGyver just seemed to jump on the
> bandwagon, but lacked the decent theme-tune, cool disguises and Mr T.
The McGyver theme tune was pretty good, but the yes, the programme was no A-Team.
Road Runner was definately my favourite as a kid.
Perhaps that the new shows don't appeal to us like the ones that were on as we were kids is because we arent kids anymore.
Kids find any kids show funny. We just have rose tinted specs about our own childhoods. One that really made me laugh (not so) recently was Maid Marrian on CBBC. That was really funny, even though I was out of watching kids shows. They showed it again recently, and it was still funny!
Perhaps that the new shows don't appeal to us like the ones that were on as we were kids is because we arent kids anymore.
Kids find any kids show funny. We just have rose tinted specs about our own childhoods. One that really made me laugh (not so) recently was Maid Marrian on CBBC. That was really funny, even though I was out of watching kids shows. They showed it again recently, and it was still funny!
WòókieeMøn§†€® wrote:
Goaty,
> your mention of Wile E Coyote made me think... why doesn't anyone ever show the
> Road Runner cartoons any more? They were just SO damn funny!
Yeah.
That's why Sheep Dog N Wolf is excellent.
It's the Coyote doing all that stuff, with Warner Bros style cartoon levels and acme items.
I think we have proven, beyond a shadow of a doubt that kids tv is rubbish today.
No decent cartoons, no action-series with sturdy heroes telling the kids to respect each other and not use violence, no bizarre drug induced animation shows (Magic Roundabout, Chorlton and The Wheelies, Mr Ben, Jamie and The Magic Torch, Rhubard & Custard, Will O The Wisp)
Damn Dirty Kids
Goaty,
> your mention of Wile E Coyote made me think... why doesn't anyone ever show the
> Road Runner cartoons any more? They were just SO damn funny!
Yeah.
That's why Sheep Dog N Wolf is excellent.
It's the Coyote doing all that stuff, with Warner Bros style cartoon levels and acme items.
I think we have proven, beyond a shadow of a doubt that kids tv is rubbish today.
No decent cartoons, no action-series with sturdy heroes telling the kids to respect each other and not use violence, no bizarre drug induced animation shows (Magic Roundabout, Chorlton and The Wheelies, Mr Ben, Jamie and The Magic Torch, Rhubard & Custard, Will O The Wisp)
Damn Dirty Kids
I don't think I said "McGyver" enough in that last post.
So I did now.
McGyver
So I did now.
McGyver
Totoro wrote:
> But there was rather a lot of gun fights and fist
> fighting in The A-Team...
Yeah, but no-one ever really got hurt.
Goaty, your mention of Wile E Coyote made me think... why doesn't anyone ever show the Road Runner cartoons any more? They were just SO damn funny!
Did you ever have the game Cliff Hanger? I had it on the C64, not sure if it was on other formats. You were a cowboy, and had to stop a bandit using various methods that were just like scenes from a Road Runner cartoon - pushing rocks off cliffs, etc. Brilliant stuff!
> But there was rather a lot of gun fights and fist
> fighting in The A-Team...
Yeah, but no-one ever really got hurt.
Goaty, your mention of Wile E Coyote made me think... why doesn't anyone ever show the Road Runner cartoons any more? They were just SO damn funny!
Did you ever have the game Cliff Hanger? I had it on the C64, not sure if it was on other formats. You were a cowboy, and had to stop a bandit using various methods that were just like scenes from a Road Runner cartoon - pushing rocks off cliffs, etc. Brilliant stuff!
True, but I always saw McGyver as the A-Teams rubbish cousin.
They had the GMVC van, Mr T, an insane vietnam vet for comedy value and always helped land owners battle wealthy property tycoons.
McGyver just seemed to jump on the bandwagon, but lacked the decent theme-tune, cool disguises and Mr T.
And now McGyver is in space pretending to be Kurt Russell.
Which is a bad thing.
They had the GMVC van, Mr T, an insane vietnam vet for comedy value and always helped land owners battle wealthy property tycoons.
McGyver just seemed to jump on the bandwagon, but lacked the decent theme-tune, cool disguises and Mr T.
And now McGyver is in space pretending to be Kurt Russell.
Which is a bad thing.
Goatboy wrote:
And I just can't think of any kids programme like
> A-Team etc that teaches kids to respect others, not use violence as a solution
> and to work for what you believe in.
How about Maguyver he never used violence as a solution...he used science and thinking.
But there was rather a lot of gun fights and fist fighting in The A-Team...and Boy George!!
And I just can't think of any kids programme like
> A-Team etc that teaches kids to respect others, not use violence as a solution
> and to work for what you believe in.
How about Maguyver he never used violence as a solution...he used science and thinking.
But there was rather a lot of gun fights and fist fighting in The A-Team...and Boy George!!
Gimme Wile E Coyote, The Ant Hill Mob, Bod, Morph, Mr Ben, Dogtanian, Battle of The Planets etc any day.
And I just can't think of any kids programme like A-Team etc that teaches kids to respect others, not use violence as a solution and to work for what you believe in.
Mr T is a goddamn, bona-fide childhood hero of mine. When I heard he had cancer, I was gutted. and the rejoiced when he got better and said "Gonna take more than that to get The T".
He put his money from movies and tv into youth projects in his area and helps kids to get off drugs and stuff, even when he was undergoing chemotherapy.
He was always gruff and angry, but he helped the kids, taught them "Lying is bad little man, don't do that." or "Hey, stay in school and get smart like Mr T"
What a fantastic, real-life superhero
And I just can't think of any kids programme like A-Team etc that teaches kids to respect others, not use violence as a solution and to work for what you believe in.
Mr T is a goddamn, bona-fide childhood hero of mine. When I heard he had cancer, I was gutted. and the rejoiced when he got better and said "Gonna take more than that to get The T".
He put his money from movies and tv into youth projects in his area and helps kids to get off drugs and stuff, even when he was undergoing chemotherapy.
He was always gruff and angry, but he helped the kids, taught them "Lying is bad little man, don't do that." or "Hey, stay in school and get smart like Mr T"
What a fantastic, real-life superhero
As far as cartoons are concerned, things have got really bad, in my opinion.
Things like Mega Babies, Godzilla, Batman etc... all naff compared to things like Tom & Jerry (surely the greatest cartoons ever made?), Dastardly & Muttley, Danger Mouse, Wacky Races and Scooby Doo.
The characters are rough, the animation isn't smooth, and they all just seem generally rushed.
The best 'cartoon' I've seen recently is the CGI version of Starship Troopers - that is quite brilliant.
Things like Mega Babies, Godzilla, Batman etc... all naff compared to things like Tom & Jerry (surely the greatest cartoons ever made?), Dastardly & Muttley, Danger Mouse, Wacky Races and Scooby Doo.
The characters are rough, the animation isn't smooth, and they all just seem generally rushed.
The best 'cartoon' I've seen recently is the CGI version of Starship Troopers - that is quite brilliant.
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