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OK this has to be theeeeeeeeee most embarassing topic I can ever talk to anyone about.
However, I am really concerned so I will risk the embarassment.
Basically I am really failing to understand why my bum area always smells. PLEASE dont make toilet humour jokes, I am a thoroughly hygenic person and in very good health. However, it always seems as if I have pumped constantly or even soiled my pants with faeces.
Neither of the two are actually the case, and it makes me very very nervous. For example, I work in ASDA behind the till and whenever I stand up to go for my break or whatever, the chair will always stink of poo even if I have only been there for a few minutes. And NO, there is absolutely nothing ''up there'' which may be causing the smell. The worst thing is, its a running joke amongst ALL of my work colleagues and they think I cant see them pulling disgusted faces. It does seem to get worse whenever I sit down. I cannot go in a car with ANYONE, and if I get onto a bus I have to sit on my own at the back with the windows open.
It has actually resorted to me visiting the loo every chance I can and spraying perfume onto my bum. Part of me felt it could be a simple case of sweating, however I highly doubt it because I never actually do sweat around that area :' { I bath myself twice a day and always ensure when I am doing a number 2 that I am completely clean ;' {
Now I know you are all probably laughing your heads off, but please understand this is a REAL problem I have and it is driving me insane with anger.
However, I am really concerned so I will risk the embarassment.
Basically I am really failing to understand why my bum area always smells. PLEASE dont make toilet humour jokes, I am a thoroughly hygenic person and in very good health. However, it always seems as if I have pumped constantly or even soiled my pants with faeces.
Neither of the two are actually the case, and it makes me very very nervous. For example, I work in ASDA behind the till and whenever I stand up to go for my break or whatever, the chair will always stink of poo even if I have only been there for a few minutes. And NO, there is absolutely nothing ''up there'' which may be causing the smell. The worst thing is, its a running joke amongst ALL of my work colleagues and they think I cant see them pulling disgusted faces. It does seem to get worse whenever I sit down. I cannot go in a car with ANYONE, and if I get onto a bus I have to sit on my own at the back with the windows open.
It has actually resorted to me visiting the loo every chance I can and spraying perfume onto my bum. Part of me felt it could be a simple case of sweating, however I highly doubt it because I never actually do sweat around that area :' { I bath myself twice a day and always ensure when I am doing a number 2 that I am completely clean ;' {
Now I know you are all probably laughing your heads off, but please understand this is a REAL problem I have and it is driving me insane with anger.
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I'm still not sure if he is serious but if he was I'd want to give him a big hug.
Mozzy wrote:
> Do what Hoji(sp?) said and use Talcon powder.
Yeah, it was Ho-jew's idea all right. So anyway, merm, is the preparation H doing any good?
> Do what Hoji(sp?) said and use Talcon powder.
Yeah, it was Ho-jew's idea all right. So anyway, merm, is the preparation H doing any good?
Yeah well done Memo!
Thought this was a joke when I read it - due to it being written by you.
Glad you got it sorted (Well, getting it sorted). Like Goatboy said, it takes balls to post that on here and to phone a doctor and tell them.
Nice one.
Glad you got it sorted (Well, getting it sorted). Like Goatboy said, it takes balls to post that on here and to phone a doctor and tell them.
Nice one.
Oh, a tear in your ass? YOUCH!
See, I was right, you had an extra hole you didn't know about. Go me!
Highly Excitable wrote:
> I've never done a fart like that.
>
> Ever.
>
> Seriously.
You should practice, it's a regular thing for me now. After my mum cooks up a curry she'll call me in to drown out the smell.
See, I was right, you had an extra hole you didn't know about. Go me!
Highly Excitable wrote:
> I've never done a fart like that.
>
> Ever.
>
> Seriously.
You should practice, it's a regular thing for me now. After my mum cooks up a curry she'll call me in to drown out the smell.
Mozzy wrote:
> I don't know how that is possible though, how can your ass still smell
> after washing it? I could fart a hundred times and my ass would still
> smell like fresh bread that have just been baked. Are you sure you
> don't have an extra hole somewhere else that you don't know about?
>
> You could try searching google for people who have the same problem.
The Wardy wrote:
> Are you sure its you that smells? I used to think i did, then i found
> out that all the chairs in my ICT Dept at school smell of poo. My ass
> was fine until i sat on their chairs and then my ass smelt at the end
> of the lesson.
guys I've already posted what was wrong!
> I don't know how that is possible though, how can your ass still smell
> after washing it? I could fart a hundred times and my ass would still
> smell like fresh bread that have just been baked. Are you sure you
> don't have an extra hole somewhere else that you don't know about?
>
> You could try searching google for people who have the same problem.
The Wardy wrote:
> Are you sure its you that smells? I used to think i did, then i found
> out that all the chairs in my ICT Dept at school smell of poo. My ass
> was fine until i sat on their chairs and then my ass smelt at the end
> of the lesson.
guys I've already posted what was wrong!
Mozzy wrote:
> I could fart a hundred times and my ass would still smell like fresh bread that have just been baked.
I've never done a fart like that.
Ever.
Seriously.
> I could fart a hundred times and my ass would still smell like fresh bread that have just been baked.
I've never done a fart like that.
Ever.
Seriously.
The Wardy wrote:
> Are you sure its you that smells? I used to think i did, then i found
> out that all the chairs in my ICT Dept at school smell of poo.
Ahahahaha!
> Are you sure its you that smells? I used to think i did, then i found
> out that all the chairs in my ICT Dept at school smell of poo.
Ahahahaha!
Just keep telling yourself that.
:D
:D
Are you sure its you that smells? I used to think i did, then i found out that all the chairs in my ICT Dept at school smell of poo. My ass was fine until i sat on their chairs and then my ass smelt at the end of the lesson.
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