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"Goodbye my lover"

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Wed 08/11/06 at 16:29
Regular
Posts: 18,185
My girlfriend and I went for some cheap food at Weatherspoons the other day. I had arranged to meet her on Regent street, and although I had arrived early she was there before me, wrapped up in a large black coat and wearing that huge, red woollen scarf I bough her last Christmas. She looked beautiful, as usual, and I knew it was going to be hard to do what it was I had to do.

It was so hard in fact that I could barely speak, only managing to utter a few monosyllabic responses to her stories. She could tell something was wrong but she dare not ask and she didn’t until we had our pre-heated burgers placed before us in the warmth of The Regal pub.

“What’s wrong honey?” she said sweetly, trying to make eye contact with me. I sighed and kept my head bowed.
“There’s someone else.” I said.
It felt like the room had suddenly fallen silent, with everyone in attendance listening in to our conversation. Laura, my girlfriend, looked at me in disbelief and struggled to find her voice.
“It isn’t you,” I said quickly, realising the cliché and changing it accordingly, “it’s just this person, she’s… she’s really special”.

“But…” she began, “ I thought things were going well?”
“They were” I said, “they are, it’s just…”
“Who is she?… How long have you…” She said helplessly.
“I’ve known her for years… She’s really great. She would come for a month or so, we’d have the greatest time ever together, and then… she’d just go. This would happen every time but I am powerless to resist.”
Laura looked heartbroken at what I was saying, but I didn’t seem to register any of this and I just carried on.
“You should see her Laura, she’s beautiful, powerful even… perhaps the greatest person in the world… I just can’t get enough of her. And she’s coming back soon, coming back for me Laura…”

Laura, trying to prevent the tears from damaging her make up, looked at her now cold burger and said: “When does she come back then?”
“December, December the 8th” I responded meekly.
Laura looked at me for a moment; there was something familiar about this date.
“And what’s her name?” she asked.
“Zelda” I said calmly, preparing to tuck into my food.
“Christopher! Are you talking about a video game?” she said crossly.
“Well… yeah… why what did you think I was talking about?”

And with a huff Laura threw her cutlery against the plate got off her chair and walked off. I stared helplessly after her for a moment before realising the people in the table beside me had been listening in. I turned to them and flashed them an uncomfortable smile,
“What’s her problem?” I said.
Thu 09/11/06 at 18:44
Regular
Posts: 9,995
Don't you mean oh barn? hahahahahha

*leaves*
Thu 09/11/06 at 20:57
Regular
Posts: 18,185
Hedfix wrote:
> Oh dear god!
>
> [URL]http://img445.imageshack.us/img445/3624/gandorf1dringozp3.jpg[/URL]

Made me cackle, even if it is a bit late now as some of the points don't really apply.

Yes Tilt, I really did take my girlfriend on a date and told her I was leaving her for a computer game. Surely it is the only normal thing to do.

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