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"Should I take a bath with a plugged in toaster ?"

I have dissertation to be in friday - can't be @ssed with it. It'd be a lot easier to jump in the bath with a morphy richards. Waddya thinK?

;cD > (Note : Borat Sagdiyev does NOT condone bathing with electrical appliances)

I have dissertation to be in friday - can't be @ssed with it. It'd be a lot easier to jump in the bath with a morphy richards. Waddya thinK?

;cD > (Note : Borat Sagdiyev does NOT condone bathing with electrical appliances)

Stop short of suicide and instead just toast your fingers. That way you'll have a flawless excuse and you can also claim compensation and appear on one of those annoying adverts: "An electrical appliance went wrong, so I contacted Claims Direct, and I was awarded 50 trillion pounds".

£49,999,999,999,999.73 of this went to my good friends at Claims Direct.

I got 27pence, so now I can start to rebuild my life.

:|

i don't know who left the post, but i still think the best one is :
Jeffrey dropped half a digestive biscuit in his tea, he got £7000.

and heres another :
Bungles M&Ms melted in his hand, not in his mouth, he got £40,000

and so on.

My dissertation has to be in on wednsday, and our flat doesn't have a bath.

What should I do with my toaster?

Dr Duck wrote:
> What should I do with my toaster?

Take it apart piece by piece and begin swallowing them. Then sit back and prey for some kind of metallic poisoning.

Alternatively, stab yourself with a pencil and hope you get led poisoning.

This was actually done;


Stick a pencil up each nostril, with sharp end in you.
Sit on a school desk.
Slam your head down as hard a possible.





The dude who did it died.

½pint wrote:
> Alternatively, stab yourself with a pencil and hope you get led
> poisoning.

You would need some sort of time travelling device, its standard now that graphite is used.

HalloHowArtThou wrote:
> This was actually done;
>
>
> Stick a pencil up each nostril, with sharp end in you.
> Sit on a school desk.
> Slam your head down as hard a possible.
>
>
>
>
>
> The dude who did it died.

garbage thats an urban legend, everyones heard it.

as for what to do when you have no bath in your house, heres an over-elaborate suicide method :

jack the front end of a (front wheel drive) car off the ground. Jump in it, start it up, start accelerating til you're in 5th gear and the wheels are spinning at a helluva rate. put a brick on the accelerator. jump out, position your head underneath a wheel. Kick the Jack !!

Hey presto, eternal darkness and silence is your reward, and NO MORE DISSERTATION.

should you not have a car, or access to one, running with scissors for long enough may produce a good result