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Not you, I mean other people.
I went out with ma woman today, she had to get hair products and bin bags and I dragged round with her.
Otherwise I don't get no naughty sauce.
And it really, really hit me just how far up their tunnel some people are.
Really.
Ok, it was in Chiswick which is a tad yuppie, but still it made me shiver inside to so many trendy robots.
Examples:
I was thirsty and it was raining, so we went into a sidewalk cafe thing called "Nero's".
I wanted a coffee. Not a big deal you'd think, most people know what this drink is.
But I was presented with an option that made my head hurt and my brain start to boil.
"I want coffee please"
"Sure, we have the following" (and he gestured to the board)
Mocha
Mochachino
Latte
Grande Latte
Decaf Half-fat Latte
Expresso
Frappucino
And about 15 other kinds.
I just wanted coffee.
Why? What is with this pursuit of obscure frothy crap from somewhere you've never heard of.
What's wrong with "Coffee".
Bt oooooh no, it has to be some European poncy drink with a vaguely swishy name that costs £2.00 for a thimble full of foam.
Rubbish.
And M&S foodhall.
I wanted a sandwich. Maybe Ham.
Instead, I am presented with 16 different selections like Thia Tiger Prawn & Avocado or some stupid mixture of ingredients that I wouldn't put together.
And my personal loathing:
Mobile Phones.
I hate them, and I hate the people that use them.
I don't mean people that leave them in cars in case they breakdown, I mean the posturing apes that walk along talking into them, making sure people can hear every single detail of their lives.
I was on Jury Duty this week, and one woman spent her entire time on her mobile to her bovine family.
And one conversation went like this:
"Hello Sarah! You did a poo-poo in the potty? Aren't you a clever girl! You're a big girl now! You did a poo-poo! Yes you are! You're the cleverest girl!"
Excuse me, you're praising a kid for not fouling itself?
Why not wait for a genuine achievment before announcing to an entire room full of strangers, some of whom are resisting every urge to yank that phone from your pudgy fist and throw it out of the window.
And the people that have "exotic" or "personalised" ringtones.
Some current Top 40 hit.
Why not just have one that sounds like a phone?
"Oh, this way I know it's mine that's ringing"
No, set it to a normal ring and you'll be in the minority.
And my newest subject of anger.
Humorous chain emails.
You know the ones.
You get it from someone at work and it's been passed around the building twice and another 56 firms so you have to scroll down 2000 lines of "this email is addressed to.." before you read some lame joke about a bloke at a funeral.
If you're going to send humorous emails to colleagues, at least make sure you know them well enough to realise that they think these sort of jokes suck.
That's enough for now, I'm off to shoot Germans online in Castle Wolfenstein
I went out with ma woman today, she had to get hair products and bin bags and I dragged round with her.
Otherwise I don't get no naughty sauce.
And it really, really hit me just how far up their tunnel some people are.
Really.
Ok, it was in Chiswick which is a tad yuppie, but still it made me shiver inside to so many trendy robots.
Examples:
I was thirsty and it was raining, so we went into a sidewalk cafe thing called "Nero's".
I wanted a coffee. Not a big deal you'd think, most people know what this drink is.
But I was presented with an option that made my head hurt and my brain start to boil.
"I want coffee please"
"Sure, we have the following" (and he gestured to the board)
Mocha
Mochachino
Latte
Grande Latte
Decaf Half-fat Latte
Expresso
Frappucino
And about 15 other kinds.
I just wanted coffee.
Why? What is with this pursuit of obscure frothy crap from somewhere you've never heard of.
What's wrong with "Coffee".
Bt oooooh no, it has to be some European poncy drink with a vaguely swishy name that costs £2.00 for a thimble full of foam.
Rubbish.
And M&S foodhall.
I wanted a sandwich. Maybe Ham.
Instead, I am presented with 16 different selections like Thia Tiger Prawn & Avocado or some stupid mixture of ingredients that I wouldn't put together.
And my personal loathing:
Mobile Phones.
I hate them, and I hate the people that use them.
I don't mean people that leave them in cars in case they breakdown, I mean the posturing apes that walk along talking into them, making sure people can hear every single detail of their lives.
I was on Jury Duty this week, and one woman spent her entire time on her mobile to her bovine family.
And one conversation went like this:
"Hello Sarah! You did a poo-poo in the potty? Aren't you a clever girl! You're a big girl now! You did a poo-poo! Yes you are! You're the cleverest girl!"
Excuse me, you're praising a kid for not fouling itself?
Why not wait for a genuine achievment before announcing to an entire room full of strangers, some of whom are resisting every urge to yank that phone from your pudgy fist and throw it out of the window.
And the people that have "exotic" or "personalised" ringtones.
Some current Top 40 hit.
Why not just have one that sounds like a phone?
"Oh, this way I know it's mine that's ringing"
No, set it to a normal ring and you'll be in the minority.
And my newest subject of anger.
Humorous chain emails.
You know the ones.
You get it from someone at work and it's been passed around the building twice and another 56 firms so you have to scroll down 2000 lines of "this email is addressed to.." before you read some lame joke about a bloke at a funeral.
If you're going to send humorous emails to colleagues, at least make sure you know them well enough to realise that they think these sort of jokes suck.
That's enough for now, I'm off to shoot Germans online in Castle Wolfenstein
Page:
Not you, I mean other people.
I went out with ma woman today, she had to get hair products and bin bags and I dragged round with her.
Otherwise I don't get no naughty sauce.
And it really, really hit me just how far up their tunnel some people are.
Really.
Ok, it was in Chiswick which is a tad yuppie, but still it made me shiver inside to so many trendy robots.
Examples:
I was thirsty and it was raining, so we went into a sidewalk cafe thing called "Nero's".
I wanted a coffee. Not a big deal you'd think, most people know what this drink is.
But I was presented with an option that made my head hurt and my brain start to boil.
"I want coffee please"
"Sure, we have the following" (and he gestured to the board)
Mocha
Mochachino
Latte
Grande Latte
Decaf Half-fat Latte
Expresso
Frappucino
And about 15 other kinds.
I just wanted coffee.
Why? What is with this pursuit of obscure frothy crap from somewhere you've never heard of.
What's wrong with "Coffee".
Bt oooooh no, it has to be some European poncy drink with a vaguely swishy name that costs £2.00 for a thimble full of foam.
Rubbish.
And M&S foodhall.
I wanted a sandwich. Maybe Ham.
Instead, I am presented with 16 different selections like Thia Tiger Prawn & Avocado or some stupid mixture of ingredients that I wouldn't put together.
And my personal loathing:
Mobile Phones.
I hate them, and I hate the people that use them.
I don't mean people that leave them in cars in case they breakdown, I mean the posturing apes that walk along talking into them, making sure people can hear every single detail of their lives.
I was on Jury Duty this week, and one woman spent her entire time on her mobile to her bovine family.
And one conversation went like this:
"Hello Sarah! You did a poo-poo in the potty? Aren't you a clever girl! You're a big girl now! You did a poo-poo! Yes you are! You're the cleverest girl!"
Excuse me, you're praising a kid for not fouling itself?
Why not wait for a genuine achievment before announcing to an entire room full of strangers, some of whom are resisting every urge to yank that phone from your pudgy fist and throw it out of the window.
And the people that have "exotic" or "personalised" ringtones.
Some current Top 40 hit.
Why not just have one that sounds like a phone?
"Oh, this way I know it's mine that's ringing"
No, set it to a normal ring and you'll be in the minority.
And my newest subject of anger.
Humorous chain emails.
You know the ones.
You get it from someone at work and it's been passed around the building twice and another 56 firms so you have to scroll down 2000 lines of "this email is addressed to.." before you read some lame joke about a bloke at a funeral.
If you're going to send humorous emails to colleagues, at least make sure you know them well enough to realise that they think these sort of jokes suck.
That's enough for now, I'm off to shoot Germans online in Castle Wolfenstein
I went out with ma woman today, she had to get hair products and bin bags and I dragged round with her.
Otherwise I don't get no naughty sauce.
And it really, really hit me just how far up their tunnel some people are.
Really.
Ok, it was in Chiswick which is a tad yuppie, but still it made me shiver inside to so many trendy robots.
Examples:
I was thirsty and it was raining, so we went into a sidewalk cafe thing called "Nero's".
I wanted a coffee. Not a big deal you'd think, most people know what this drink is.
But I was presented with an option that made my head hurt and my brain start to boil.
"I want coffee please"
"Sure, we have the following" (and he gestured to the board)
Mocha
Mochachino
Latte
Grande Latte
Decaf Half-fat Latte
Expresso
Frappucino
And about 15 other kinds.
I just wanted coffee.
Why? What is with this pursuit of obscure frothy crap from somewhere you've never heard of.
What's wrong with "Coffee".
Bt oooooh no, it has to be some European poncy drink with a vaguely swishy name that costs £2.00 for a thimble full of foam.
Rubbish.
And M&S foodhall.
I wanted a sandwich. Maybe Ham.
Instead, I am presented with 16 different selections like Thia Tiger Prawn & Avocado or some stupid mixture of ingredients that I wouldn't put together.
And my personal loathing:
Mobile Phones.
I hate them, and I hate the people that use them.
I don't mean people that leave them in cars in case they breakdown, I mean the posturing apes that walk along talking into them, making sure people can hear every single detail of their lives.
I was on Jury Duty this week, and one woman spent her entire time on her mobile to her bovine family.
And one conversation went like this:
"Hello Sarah! You did a poo-poo in the potty? Aren't you a clever girl! You're a big girl now! You did a poo-poo! Yes you are! You're the cleverest girl!"
Excuse me, you're praising a kid for not fouling itself?
Why not wait for a genuine achievment before announcing to an entire room full of strangers, some of whom are resisting every urge to yank that phone from your pudgy fist and throw it out of the window.
And the people that have "exotic" or "personalised" ringtones.
Some current Top 40 hit.
Why not just have one that sounds like a phone?
"Oh, this way I know it's mine that's ringing"
No, set it to a normal ring and you'll be in the minority.
And my newest subject of anger.
Humorous chain emails.
You know the ones.
You get it from someone at work and it's been passed around the building twice and another 56 firms so you have to scroll down 2000 lines of "this email is addressed to.." before you read some lame joke about a bloke at a funeral.
If you're going to send humorous emails to colleagues, at least make sure you know them well enough to realise that they think these sort of jokes suck.
That's enough for now, I'm off to shoot Germans online in Castle Wolfenstein
Oi, leave Nero alone you sensless music type dude! They make a mean hot chocolate, best in Leeds. So there.
Besides from that, you're pretty much spot on.
Besides from that, you're pretty much spot on.
I hate Room 101. What would happen if you tried to put Room 101 into Room 101? Would the world end?
i love your posts goatboy, why cause it's all true true true.
you'll be plaesed to know that i have a normal ringing mobile phone that goes "ring, ring" and when i drink coffee all i want is COFFEE not some crappy foam coffee, no choclate sprinkles no double foam no cream coffee ok just coffee.
And people talking on phones about nothing Grrrrrr mainly women.
a typical bloke call goes soemthing like this normaly.
"hi mate how are you"
reply "ok"
"so you still wanna go down the pub?"
reply "yes"
"ok mate see ya there, bye"
reply "bye"
no a womens call of the same sort of guidelines goes on for 30mins and includes all they did today and what there gunna wear.
but while we're on a whinge what about tv ads GRRRRRR they go on for ages now, i can have a full bath, wash the car hey i could cook dinner during an ad break thee days.
well that's my rant over and keep up the whinging goatboy.
PUNKS
you'll be plaesed to know that i have a normal ringing mobile phone that goes "ring, ring" and when i drink coffee all i want is COFFEE not some crappy foam coffee, no choclate sprinkles no double foam no cream coffee ok just coffee.
And people talking on phones about nothing Grrrrrr mainly women.
a typical bloke call goes soemthing like this normaly.
"hi mate how are you"
reply "ok"
"so you still wanna go down the pub?"
reply "yes"
"ok mate see ya there, bye"
reply "bye"
no a womens call of the same sort of guidelines goes on for 30mins and includes all they did today and what there gunna wear.
but while we're on a whinge what about tv ads GRRRRRR they go on for ages now, i can have a full bath, wash the car hey i could cook dinner during an ad break thee days.
well that's my rant over and keep up the whinging goatboy.
PUNKS
monkey_man wrote:
> I hate Room 101. What would happen if you tried to put Room 101 into Room 101?
> Would the world end?
Stephen Fry did and replaced it with Room Lovely. All that ended though was the problem, luckilly.
> I hate Room 101. What would happen if you tried to put Room 101 into Room 101?
> Would the world end?
Stephen Fry did and replaced it with Room Lovely. All that ended though was the problem, luckilly.
What's wrong with a half double decaffeinated half-caf, with a twist of lemon?
(LA Story)
(LA Story)
Goatboy wrote:
And M&S foodhall.
I wanted a sandwich. Maybe Ham.
Instead, I am presented with 16 different selections like Thia Tiger Prawn & Avocado or some stupid mixture of ingredients that I wouldn't put together.
I feel so strongly on this :D
Last time I went to shopping centre with mates and we all went to buy some food... they had no problem picking all that mixed up s***e.
Mayonese and b******s.
Smoked Ham in a relish, pineapple, mint sauce...
All I want is cheese and ham.
They don't have that at all... anytime.
So I went and asked if they had any and they said there wasn't a big enough demand, so I told them where to shove their olive and acne meat bagquet.
:)
Nice post :D
And M&S foodhall.
I wanted a sandwich. Maybe Ham.
Instead, I am presented with 16 different selections like Thia Tiger Prawn & Avocado or some stupid mixture of ingredients that I wouldn't put together.
I feel so strongly on this :D
Last time I went to shopping centre with mates and we all went to buy some food... they had no problem picking all that mixed up s***e.
Mayonese and b******s.
Smoked Ham in a relish, pineapple, mint sauce...
All I want is cheese and ham.
They don't have that at all... anytime.
So I went and asked if they had any and they said there wasn't a big enough demand, so I told them where to shove their olive and acne meat bagquet.
:)
Nice post :D
Page: