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This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
FIVE MINUTES
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
NOTHING
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine"
GO AHEAD
This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"
THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.
WHATEVER
It's a woman's way of saying *!#@ YOU!
Send this to the men you know to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology!
Feel free to add your own - I'm sure we all have different experiences.
Not that I have a great experience of them(women) mind you!
When suggesting take-away:
Me: What do you want?
She: I don't mind
Me: That's a lie though, because if I suggest pizza you're going to turn your nose up.
She: Well want do you want?
Me: You want me to say Chinese, don't you?
She: You're mean.
Therefore:
YOU'RE MEAN = I'm right
> Most of you are either whipped or paranoid by/of women.
>
> Not me, I pwn j00 n00bs!!!111
Woman pwner.
> NOT IN THE HAIR! NOT THE HAIR!
> Simply offer them the choice of spattered visage or mangled mullet.
> They will see sense and act like they're in an Alberto Balsam
> commercial.
Goatboy for Prime Minister.
Yes
No.
No
Yes.
> Another classic:
>
> No, I don't want any chips.
>
> An outright lie. You just know full well that she does, and will be
> grabbing at least 50% of yours.
:D It's funny cause it's true.
My mother is coming to stay for the week
Prepare for a week of utter hell and devastation, in which you musn't talk and spend every night in the dog's bed.
Not me, I pwn j00 n00bs!!!111
Me: What (something) do you want?
Her: I don't mind
Me: You sure?
Her: Yeah
Me: I like this one
Her: ...
Me: What?
Her: Nevermind...just...
This is not an actual offer for you to make any choice, because she will have told you what she wants moments before saying you can choose. She just wants you to confirm that she's always right and has great taste.
I don't mind
Tricky one that can be used either at the start or the end of a conversation. With certain things such as dinner choices, if you enquire as to her thoughts, she may throw this one in at the start waiting to hear your idea before telling you no, or if it's about what to have on TV, it can be used at the end when you say you'd really like to watch the football team you support play in the Champions League final rather then old Trisha repeats. If this is the case, you can be pretty sure these three little words will then be used in conjunction with a "sigh".