Viewing Thread:
"The Great American Bash Results Thread"

The Great American Bash
July 24th
Buffalo, New York
HSBC Arena

One amusing note on Heat - someone had a sign that said "Earl Hebner sold me my shirt".

Heat - Cruiserweight Title
Paul London vs Nunzio
My prediction: Paul London
Result: Paul London (2:35)
Match: Pretty meh - it was over so damn quickly.

So, the event was sponsored by WWE.com. Wow...

1. Tag Titles
MnM (c) vs Animal & Heidenreich
My prediction: Animal & Heidenreich
Result: Animal & Heidenreich (6:46)
Match: Pretty "meh", although Animal put on quite an impressive performance, and seeing as he dedicated it to Hawk, I thought it was obvious they'd win (with a Doomsday Device, nonetheless). The nostalgia factor made this match all the more fun, though.
Rating: 7/10

Eddie Guerrero had a veeery strange segment, where he has a "new addition". Lovely. That can be his next DVD.

Oh, and WWE messed up - they had a "2 weeks ago" video package pop up for about a second before removing itself and Christian began coming out. Odd.

2. Christian vs Booker T
My prediction: Christian
Result: Booker T (11:38)
Match: Pretty good match, ending with Booker T nailing a top-rope scissor-kick for the pin. Booker T's now 6-1 at the GAB PPVs throughout the ages.
Rating: 8/10

Milena is annoyed MnM lost the titles, and says she'll never be seen in her underwear.

A Summerslam promo airs.

3. United States Title
Orlando Jordan (c) vs Chris Benoit
My prediction: Chris Benoit (14:24)
Result: Orlando Jordan
Match: Was quite a decent match, but loses points for the absolutely HORRIBLE ending. Benoit gets rammed into an exposed turnbuckle and pinned. The moronic referee doesn't notice, even though it's right in front of him, and a lucid Benoit doesn't seem to think to tell the ref what happened. Oh, and I thought that when the ref went outside, he was going to restart the match. AWFUL ending.
Rating: 7.5/10

A promo airs for the Hassan/Taker match.

4. #1 Contender's Match
Muhammed Hassan vs The Undertaker
My prediction: The Undertaker
Result: The Undertaker (8:05)
Match: Before the match starts, Hassan comes out with the "terrorists" that attacked The Undertaker, and Hassan comes out on some stupid elevated thingy. He then reminds everyone that if he loses, he's leaving Smackdown (an easy get out clause of either his character or the SD brand, meaning he can return to RAW where he won't have UPN on his case). Taker wins with a naff Chokeslam.
Rating: 7/10

The aftermath was better than the match. Taker kills the "sympathisers", and throws Daivari through the side of the table. He grabs Hassan up the ramp and Last Ride's him through a grating he opened up. It made me laugh, because the sound of Hassan hitting the floor was so horribly delayed by the sound effects guys (a la Hawk's "suicidal" fall off the titantron in 1998).

5. 6 Man Tag
The Mexicools vs bWo
My prediction: bWo
Result: The Mexicools (4:54)
Match: This could've been a good match, if it wasn't so short. Craptacular matches like Benoit/Orlando get 15 minutes, and this barely gets a third of it. Amusing though that Juvi didn't nail the 450 Splash.
Rating: 6.5/10

A promo airs for Mysterio vs Guerrero.

Mysterio talks to his kid backstage. I'm just wondering what this secret is. Eddie: "I am his father." Well, that doesn't explain how the kid looks so much like Mysterio...There's kayfabe, and then there's KAYFABE.

6. "If you beat me...I'll never tell."
Eddie Guerrero vs Rey Mysterio
My prediction: Eddie Guerrero
Result: Rey Mysterio (15:39)
Match: Match of the night so far by a long way. Some great work here, and I was bloody surprised that Mysterio won. Serves Eddie right for being cocky and not pinning Mysterio right after the Frog Splash, though. So, I guess that's the end of that rubbish storyline, or at least I hope.
Rating: 8.5/10

7. Bra and Panties
Ref: Candice Michelle
Milena vs Torrie Wilson
My prediction: Torrie Wilson
Result: Milena (3:53)
Match: *grabs Kleenex* Meh, pretty crap, I wanted Milena to have a thong on :(. Still, she looked hot as hell, and I wish she'd stop covering those boosoms up :0D
Rating: 4/10

A promo aired for HBK vs Hogan at Summerslam.

The promo for the main event then aired.

8. World Heavyweight Title
Batista (c) vs JBL
My prediction: Batista
Result: JBL via DQ (19:48)
Match: Better than I expected, but I HATE DQ victories of any sort. Horrible, HORRIBLY cheap ending with Batista beating the crap outta JBL with a chair. Fun.
Rating: 8.5/10

Pretty average event really. Not that great, but as is expected with the WWE these days.

robbie V = word count wh*re :)

The Juice wrote:
> I completely disagree. You've awarded it an 8.5 rating (matching your
> Guerrero-Mysterio rating), yet it was quite easily the worst match of
> the night, by a long, long way. I'm not counting the Bra &
> Panties match, you understand. :)


Don't pay attention to Reefer's ratings, he's far far too generous. In reality the Boretista vs JBL match was about a 2

Cong_Man wrote:
> Put him under a mask and give him a ridiculous Curry Man/Shark
> Boy-esque gimmick :-)


Never mention the legendary Curry Man in the same sentence as Hassan!!!

But anyway even with a goofy mask gimmick with the rise of the IWC he'll soon get found out as Hassan and it wouldn't work.......... thus a good firing is in order :-D

The Juice wrote:
> Reefer wrote:
> 8. World Heavyweight Title
> Batista (c) vs JBL
> Rating: 8.5/10
>
> I completely disagree. You've awarded it an 8.5 rating (matching your
> Guerrero-Mysterio rating), yet it was quite easily the worst match of
> the night, by a long, long way. I'm not counting the Bra &
> Panties match, you understand. :)
>
> Seriously, though, it reminded me of Brock Lesnar against Goldberg in
> which they just kept running into each other and doing nothing. It was
> exceedingly poor. The only thing I was happy about was when JBL threw
> Batista across the announce table, which then eliminated Michael Cole
> from his commentary position for a couple of minutes. Two minutes of
> blissful action, that was.
>
>
> All in all, I was very disappointed with this PPV. For a WWE PPV, it
> didn't look too bad at all, as there were some respectable matches on
> the card. Despite the bWo's quite simply fantastic entrance, they
> completely ruined that match by making it far too short. The crowd
> were awful here as well; there was absolutely zero reaction for any
> of the superstars, which annoyed me a fair bit. As well as this match
> frustrating me, the outcome of the Booker-Christian and Benoit-Jordan
> matches were painful as well, as the endings were far too
> simplistic.
>
> I did enjoy the tag team match to open the show, surprisingly. It
> wasn't a technical wrestling-fest, that's for sure, but it was
> entertaining, and I was hopeful the rest of the PPV would follow in
> its footsteps. Other than Eddie versus Rey, though, none of the other
> matches were worthwhile. And even that wasn't what it should have
> been; there were far too many stupid and needless interruptions. I'll
> just forget about Taker-Hassan, because aside from the badly timed
> incident at the end, there was nothing special about this one
> either.
>
>
> All in all, another PPV which has been ruined by stupid decisions.
> It's so blatantly obvious that Batista got DQ'd so that they can now
> set up either a Triple Threat or a Fatal-4-Way match for the World
> Heavyweight Championship at Summerslam. They didn't want Batista
> against Undertaker (understandable, that), so they've kept the option
> of having JBL in the match, and possibly left a slot open for Orton.
> Of course, Undertaker is going to win it, but not by pinning Batista.
> The predictability ratings are sky high at the moment.

too right there

Reefer wrote:
> 8. World Heavyweight Title
> Batista (c) vs JBL
> Rating: 8.5/10

I completely disagree. You've awarded it an 8.5 rating (matching your Guerrero-Mysterio rating), yet it was quite easily the worst match of the night, by a long, long way. I'm not counting the Bra & Panties match, you understand. :)

Seriously, though, it reminded me of Brock Lesnar against Goldberg in which they just kept running into each other and doing nothing. It was exceedingly poor. The only thing I was happy about was when JBL threw Batista across the announce table, which then eliminated Michael Cole from his commentary position for a couple of minutes. Two minutes of blissful action, that was.


All in all, I was very disappointed with this PPV. For a WWE PPV, it didn't look too bad at all, as there were some respectable matches on the card. Despite the bWo's quite simply fantastic entrance, they completely ruined that match by making it far too short. The crowd were awful here as well; there was absolutely zero reaction for any of the superstars, which annoyed me a fair bit. As well as this match frustrating me, the outcome of the Booker-Christian and Benoit-Jordan matches were painful as well, as the endings were far too simplistic.

I did enjoy the tag team match to open the show, surprisingly. It wasn't a technical wrestling-fest, that's for sure, but it was entertaining, and I was hopeful the rest of the PPV would follow in its footsteps. Other than Eddie versus Rey, though, none of the other matches were worthwhile. And even that wasn't what it should have been; there were far too many stupid and needless interruptions. I'll just forget about Taker-Hassan, because aside from the badly timed incident at the end, there was nothing special about this one either.


All in all, another PPV which has been ruined by stupid decisions. It's so blatantly obvious that Batista got DQ'd so that they can now set up either a Triple Threat or a Fatal-4-Way match for the World Heavyweight Championship at Summerslam. They didn't want Batista against Undertaker (understandable, that), so they've kept the option of having JBL in the match, and possibly left a slot open for Orton. Of course, Undertaker is going to win it, but not by pinning Batista. The predictability ratings are sky high at the moment.

results are just what I thought

Kawada wrote:
> Hmmmm Hollywood Nova looks suspiciously like Simon Dean

Pure coincidence surely? ;-)

Kawada wrote:
> Still don't know how they can repackage him, he'll always be Hassan
> and will just be booed for that no matter what his gimmick is.

Put him under a mask and give him a ridiculous Curry Man/Shark Boy-esque gimmick :-)

Kawada wrote:
> For god sake just shut him up, get him squashed and have him **** off
> from the tv screen the stupid offensive gimmick meister

not his fault dude, he's just doing as he's told.

i wonder what they'll do with him now though?

The Wardy wrote:

> Anyone know the latest on Lesnar return?

alledgedely returning at Summerslam mate.