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"I've been mixing with the criminal element ...."

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Wed 11/05/05 at 00:16
Regular
"Going nowhere fast"
Posts: 6,574
It’s ages since I went to Wakefield to meet the girls so I thought I’d share the gossip with you that I’d been missing out on – well not all of it.

So firstly I find out that the landlord of the pub we usually go in has left his wife and kids and moved into a flat with one of his barmaids. He is 44 and has moved in with his 18 year old shaggette. Although that isn’t criminal - it should be. Especially seeing as he has a 23 year old daughter.

A friend has been arrested for biting her neighbour. The charge is false but she still has to keep going to the cop shop

Another friend has been arrested for masterminding a spate of particularly nasty armed robberies at some fast food outlets. I know they say that you don’t really know people but that is just laughable. They have been to her mothers house (she still lives with her mum) because they’d been told that all the machetes and pickaxe handles were there. Oddly enough they didn’t find anything but you can imagine the conversation:

“ ’Ere Sarge – I’ve found a machete”
“ Do you mind – that’s my butter knife. Give it here and I’ll prove it “
“ Er, no, that’s okay thanks. I’ll just keep hold of it “

She hasn’t sent me any text messages and jokes for ages so I thought we must have fallen out but apparently the Police kept her phone.

I just don’t get gossip like that round at my local!
Wed 11/05/05 at 00:27
Regular
"8==="
Posts: 33,481
Do you live in or around Essex by any chance?
Wed 11/05/05 at 00:16
Regular
"Going nowhere fast"
Posts: 6,574
It’s ages since I went to Wakefield to meet the girls so I thought I’d share the gossip with you that I’d been missing out on – well not all of it.

So firstly I find out that the landlord of the pub we usually go in has left his wife and kids and moved into a flat with one of his barmaids. He is 44 and has moved in with his 18 year old shaggette. Although that isn’t criminal - it should be. Especially seeing as he has a 23 year old daughter.

A friend has been arrested for biting her neighbour. The charge is false but she still has to keep going to the cop shop

Another friend has been arrested for masterminding a spate of particularly nasty armed robberies at some fast food outlets. I know they say that you don’t really know people but that is just laughable. They have been to her mothers house (she still lives with her mum) because they’d been told that all the machetes and pickaxe handles were there. Oddly enough they didn’t find anything but you can imagine the conversation:

“ ’Ere Sarge – I’ve found a machete”
“ Do you mind – that’s my butter knife. Give it here and I’ll prove it “
“ Er, no, that’s okay thanks. I’ll just keep hold of it “

She hasn’t sent me any text messages and jokes for ages so I thought we must have fallen out but apparently the Police kept her phone.

I just don’t get gossip like that round at my local!

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