GetDotted Domains

Viewing Thread:
"Child Abuse (Poem)"

The "Creative Writing" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.

Mon 23/04/07 at 17:28
Regular
Posts: 285
Its dark in here,
Im all alone.
What are they planning,
In this horrible home?

I hear noises,
Which I am not meant to hear.
These are the moments,
Of which I tremble in fear.

Will the door open,
To this room of which im locked in?
To let the slightest
Of light seep in?

As I look up and down,
Then around and around,
Nothing can stop,
That frightening sound.

If only someone knew
That I was in here.
Maybe they could save me,
And get rid of this tear.

The huge lock,
At which I stare,
Begins to move
And thickens the air.

The door is open,
In floods the fresh air.
Its times like these,
When I need my teddy bear.

As they grab me by the wrist.
My body begins to shake,
Placing the dark bag over my head,
If only my world was fake.

I am tied up and thrown outside,
Where my face and floor meet.
The noise is horrific,
Yet to the outside world it is so discrete.

Please people,
Its up to you.
Please get together,
And be my saving crew.

The outside world,
Is oblivious to me,
This plain grey room,
Is all I will ever see.

I am hurt and bruised,
Crying in pain.
Blood runs down my wrist,
Away from the vein.

Starving, bleeding and mentally scarred.
I don’t know how much longer I can last.
Now its just a matter of time,
Please take the time, to contrast.
Wed 26/09/07 at 20:40
Regular
Posts: 285
Was just reading a few of my older posts. I didnt realise there were people who actually read it =) Thanks for the compliments and I didnt write this poem from experience. It was all out of my head.
Sat 07/07/07 at 18:58
Regular
"Why do peole b****"
Posts: 303
i wrote a story about child abuse at skl it was so gd i had 2 read it 2 the english department!
Wed 04/07/07 at 06:56
Regular
Posts: 938
Is that you? Are you writing from experience or are you just imagining what it is like?

You do a fine job with the words taking the reader there, but I can't feel it. Perhaps it's because you're speaking from the numb. It seems you're more narrating the visual.

It's a good peice. Writing it out more will help draw the emotion out. Sometimes it's the hardest part to deal with, writing of these topics, but it can be cathartic and healing. Hardship in a neat box isn't as appealing and compelling as a screaming scratched-up rough draft. Just quoting FrouFrou, "there's beauty in the breakdown."
Sat 30/06/07 at 19:50
Regular
"Why do peole b****"
Posts: 303
Thats a good poem.
Very inspirational. Well done
Very sad too
Mon 23/04/07 at 17:28
Regular
Posts: 285
Its dark in here,
Im all alone.
What are they planning,
In this horrible home?

I hear noises,
Which I am not meant to hear.
These are the moments,
Of which I tremble in fear.

Will the door open,
To this room of which im locked in?
To let the slightest
Of light seep in?

As I look up and down,
Then around and around,
Nothing can stop,
That frightening sound.

If only someone knew
That I was in here.
Maybe they could save me,
And get rid of this tear.

The huge lock,
At which I stare,
Begins to move
And thickens the air.

The door is open,
In floods the fresh air.
Its times like these,
When I need my teddy bear.

As they grab me by the wrist.
My body begins to shake,
Placing the dark bag over my head,
If only my world was fake.

I am tied up and thrown outside,
Where my face and floor meet.
The noise is horrific,
Yet to the outside world it is so discrete.

Please people,
Its up to you.
Please get together,
And be my saving crew.

The outside world,
Is oblivious to me,
This plain grey room,
Is all I will ever see.

I am hurt and bruised,
Crying in pain.
Blood runs down my wrist,
Away from the vein.

Starving, bleeding and mentally scarred.
I don’t know how much longer I can last.
Now its just a matter of time,
Please take the time, to contrast.

Freeola & GetDotted are rated 5 Stars

Check out some of our customer reviews below:

First Class!
I feel that your service on this occasion was absolutely first class - a model of excellence. After this, I hope to stay with Freeola for a long time!
Wonderful...
... and so easy-to-use even for a technophobe like me. I had my website up in a couple of hours. Thank you.
Vivien

View More Reviews

Need some help? Give us a call on 01376 55 60 60

Go to Support Centre
Feedback Close Feedback

It appears you are using an old browser, as such, some parts of the Freeola and Getdotted site will not work as intended. Using the latest version of your browser, or another browser such as Google Chrome, Mozilla Firefox, or Opera will provide a better, safer browsing experience for you.