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"Darth Porn"

The doorbell woke him, only moments before his alarm clock would have done anyway. He leaped out of bed, still half asleep, but all too aware of what he was expecting in the post this morning.

He grabbed the first piece of apparel that came to hand, a 6 year old pair of jogging pants, swiftly donned them and ran down the stairs. He opened the door to greet the postman, and his heart sank as he noticed that it was not what he expected, but instead the other piece of mail that he had almost forgotten about. A Gamecube game. Great. He dutifully signed for it, closed the door and dropped the game on the floor before going back to bed.

Only seconds after his head hit the pillow did his alarm get him back up again. He turned it off, no longer in any mood to bother getting up. He soon fell back to sleep, but only scant minutes later, the doorbell rang again. Again he grabbed his old joggning pants and went to the door, wondering who this would be, since the postman had already been.

It was another postman, and this time, he had brought the right piece of mail. The package was hurriedly signed for, and after the door had almost been slammed in the postman's face, he ran back upstairs to open his prize.

He stood in his bedroom, his girlfriend still asleep in the bed across from him. He stood over her, breathing deeply, mechanically.

KOOOOOOOOOOOO
PUUUUUUUUUUUU
KOOOOOOOOOOOO
PUUUUUUUUUUUU

His dark and shiny visage would have brought terror to her heart if only she opened her eyes, but she didn't. She never knew the evil influence which stood over her in those moments.

At last, the prophecies had come to pass. Darth Porn was upon the land.


MWAHAHAAHAAHAHAA!!

Hmm...Afrodo Big-end meets his friends Grand-Alf (the French meaning of grand...), Third-Legolas and Spamwise Gamgee in a quest to keep his ring from falling into the wrong hands.

Some of those were really weak...and I think I'm pretty much fresh out now. :)

I want to see these pics.. just so I can ridicule IB... but that's not his fault

:-D

Nice one.

Sore Ron the evil Rimgmaster releases his Backriders to find the fabled talking wood, in my version.

The sagacious one wrote:
> I'm doing a LOTR porno with my strap on Bilbo.

I'm sure there's a bit where Tom Bombadil calls himself Bombadildo...

No, you are right, we don't deserve to see you in it, so unworthy that if you ever posted a link to a pic of you wearing it, we'd have to committ Sepaku.

My Vader helmet rocks.

It rocks so hard you people don't deserve to see pictures of me wearing it.

I'm doing a LOTR porno with my strap on Bilbo.

All you need now is a glow-in-the-dark condom.... Oh God, cancel image, cancel, cancel, cancel!

"I should have recognised your foul stench"

Hur Hur

"I cannot teach this boy, he has no pants"
"I find your lack of pants disturbing"
"I used to bullseye wamprats in my pants back home"
"You came in that pants? You're braver than I thought"
"Jabba has no respect for a smuggler that drops his pants at the first sign of an Imperial Cruiser"

etc etc

Arwen Undomiel wrote:
> Would be funny if the bit about peeing over me making the silly
> noises were true......


Urrrrrrrrr.