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This thread has been linked to the game 'Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater'.
Flake minced his way long the dark corridor. It was dark, it was cold, there was water dripping from the pipes that were strung along the ceiling above him. "Why oh Why did I ever accept this dumb mission?" thought Flake to himself. He thought about his nice appartment back in NY, the gay bar just around the corner where all his friends would be having a good old chin wag at this time of night, and his cat, Fluffy. What would Fluffy be doing now? Flake shook his head to clear his thoughts; he had to concentrate because the critical part of this operation was just around the corner.
He approached the L-bend at the end of this particular stretch and flattened himself against the wall, then quickly jumped forward again as one of the hot water pipes burnt though his rubber swim suit.
"Damn!" he cursed, looking at the singed rubber across his butt, "That's gonna leave a mark."
Carefully he peered around the corner. There was a guard at the far end, about 50ft away from him, standing in front of the door that Flake needed to get through. Flake considered his options, and as he did so his Codec beeped in his ear. He put his fingers up to his earlobe, gave it a tweak and the signal came through.
"Hi sweetie, this is Otacon!"
"Lo ducky, what's up?"
"Weeelll, guess!"
"Um, I haven't got time right now darling, is it important?"
"Oooh, you spoilsport! OK, I was just calling to let you know that I've dropped off your laundry back at your place, and did a bit of dusting while I was there. You really should do a bit more housework, Flake!"
"Thanks hun, did you feed Fluffy?"
"Fluffy's fine. He misses you, so do I, what time will you be back?"
Flake glanced at his Swiss watch, he had to be in and out of here quickly before anyone was alerted. It was now 11pm CET, and he had to be back at the prearranged pickup point within the next 30 minutes. He couldn't afford to be late because the submarine would leave without him and he'd probably get his wrists slapped. The short trip from the Norwegian Fjord back to the US Airbase in Helsinki, then a 3 hour trans-Atlantic crossing in a stealth jet, he figured he'd be home by midnight EST.
"I'll say 1am your time just to be on the safe side, Otty, don't wait up OK?"
"Oh, OK, maybe I'll go for a couple of drinks then, be good! I know I won't!"
The Codec beeped again as Otacon signed off. Flake decided it was now or never and gathered himself for the upcoming confrontation. He got lucky. The guard was moving towards him, probably suspicious of the smell of burning rubber that he'd picked up the scent of a few seconds ago. As he got to within 10 feet of Flake's position, Flake jumped out from his hiding position.
"Surprise!" shouted Flake, as he slapped the guard hard across the cheek.
"Oooh, you b***h!" screamed the guard, prepping his handbag for retaliation.
But Flake was to quick, and having already opened his compact he blew fine powder into the guard's unsuspecting face. The guard was unconscious 0.3 seconds later. Flake checked his complextion in the compact's mirror, then quickly dragged the guard back around the corner, out of sight of anyone who may come through that door.
All was clear, so Flake cautiously crept up towards the far end of the corridor. He couldn't be certain, but he thought he could sense the high pitched hum of lasers. Just to make sure he popped a fag in his mouth, chuckling at the innuendo as he did so. Puffing the smoke towards the door revealed the thread-thin beams of red laser traversing the few feet between him and his destination, so he managed to spritely hop over these, then paused to listen.
All was silent, so he placed his hand on the doorhandle and turned it. The door opened inwards, and Flake couldn't see inside due to the dark. He risked being incautious for a split second as he darted inside the room and closed the door behind him. There he rested, trying to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Before they could do so, there was a click, and the room was awash with bright light. Flake threw his arm up before his eyes, but it was too late, he was already blinded. A voice, low and menacing, spoke to him.
"So, you made it..."
"Huh? Who are you?" Flake couldn't quite place the voice.
"I am your brother, Flake..."
"Limp? Limp Flake? What are you doing here??" Flake was troubled now, things weren't going according to plan.
"Ha Ha Ha! I'm waiting for you, of course! Did you think you could just sneak into this military installation, steal the plans for Metal Gear Tex, and sneak out again?"
Flake was confused. "Metal Gear Tex? What are you talking about?"
"Ah HA!" his brother seemed amused by Flake's lack of plot knowledge. "Allow me to fill you in, brother!"
There followed 20 minutes of cut-scene where Limp explained all about how Metal Gear Tex was now in the posession of the La Le Lu Li Lo, who were masquerading as a Village People tribute band until such a time as they could take over the world. How they were going to make Flake the fall guy. How they didn't manage to do this in the last two games because Hideo Kojima didn't write this one. How they were going to install Raiden as a gay icon for all the world to admire and worship.
But it was too late again. Flake had already got bored 5 minutes in, and had dozed off, despite someone on his Codec yelling "Flake? Flake! Flaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!" into his ear.
Petal Gear for Solid 3: Substances - In all good stores from 7th March
Bring some lipstick.
He approached the L-bend at the end of this particular stretch and flattened himself against the wall, then quickly jumped forward again as one of the hot water pipes burnt though his rubber swim suit.
"Damn!" he cursed, looking at the singed rubber across his butt, "That's gonna leave a mark."
Carefully he peered around the corner. There was a guard at the far end, about 50ft away from him, standing in front of the door that Flake needed to get through. Flake considered his options, and as he did so his Codec beeped in his ear. He put his fingers up to his earlobe, gave it a tweak and the signal came through.
"Hi sweetie, this is Otacon!"
"Lo ducky, what's up?"
"Weeelll, guess!"
"Um, I haven't got time right now darling, is it important?"
"Oooh, you spoilsport! OK, I was just calling to let you know that I've dropped off your laundry back at your place, and did a bit of dusting while I was there. You really should do a bit more housework, Flake!"
"Thanks hun, did you feed Fluffy?"
"Fluffy's fine. He misses you, so do I, what time will you be back?"
Flake glanced at his Swiss watch, he had to be in and out of here quickly before anyone was alerted. It was now 11pm CET, and he had to be back at the prearranged pickup point within the next 30 minutes. He couldn't afford to be late because the submarine would leave without him and he'd probably get his wrists slapped. The short trip from the Norwegian Fjord back to the US Airbase in Helsinki, then a 3 hour trans-Atlantic crossing in a stealth jet, he figured he'd be home by midnight EST.
"I'll say 1am your time just to be on the safe side, Otty, don't wait up OK?"
"Oh, OK, maybe I'll go for a couple of drinks then, be good! I know I won't!"
The Codec beeped again as Otacon signed off. Flake decided it was now or never and gathered himself for the upcoming confrontation. He got lucky. The guard was moving towards him, probably suspicious of the smell of burning rubber that he'd picked up the scent of a few seconds ago. As he got to within 10 feet of Flake's position, Flake jumped out from his hiding position.
"Surprise!" shouted Flake, as he slapped the guard hard across the cheek.
"Oooh, you b***h!" screamed the guard, prepping his handbag for retaliation.
But Flake was to quick, and having already opened his compact he blew fine powder into the guard's unsuspecting face. The guard was unconscious 0.3 seconds later. Flake checked his complextion in the compact's mirror, then quickly dragged the guard back around the corner, out of sight of anyone who may come through that door.
All was clear, so Flake cautiously crept up towards the far end of the corridor. He couldn't be certain, but he thought he could sense the high pitched hum of lasers. Just to make sure he popped a fag in his mouth, chuckling at the innuendo as he did so. Puffing the smoke towards the door revealed the thread-thin beams of red laser traversing the few feet between him and his destination, so he managed to spritely hop over these, then paused to listen.
All was silent, so he placed his hand on the doorhandle and turned it. The door opened inwards, and Flake couldn't see inside due to the dark. He risked being incautious for a split second as he darted inside the room and closed the door behind him. There he rested, trying to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Before they could do so, there was a click, and the room was awash with bright light. Flake threw his arm up before his eyes, but it was too late, he was already blinded. A voice, low and menacing, spoke to him.
"So, you made it..."
"Huh? Who are you?" Flake couldn't quite place the voice.
"I am your brother, Flake..."
"Limp? Limp Flake? What are you doing here??" Flake was troubled now, things weren't going according to plan.
"Ha Ha Ha! I'm waiting for you, of course! Did you think you could just sneak into this military installation, steal the plans for Metal Gear Tex, and sneak out again?"
Flake was confused. "Metal Gear Tex? What are you talking about?"
"Ah HA!" his brother seemed amused by Flake's lack of plot knowledge. "Allow me to fill you in, brother!"
There followed 20 minutes of cut-scene where Limp explained all about how Metal Gear Tex was now in the posession of the La Le Lu Li Lo, who were masquerading as a Village People tribute band until such a time as they could take over the world. How they were going to make Flake the fall guy. How they didn't manage to do this in the last two games because Hideo Kojima didn't write this one. How they were going to install Raiden as a gay icon for all the world to admire and worship.
But it was too late again. Flake had already got bored 5 minutes in, and had dozed off, despite someone on his Codec yelling "Flake? Flake! Flaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!" into his ear.
Petal Gear for Solid 3: Substances - In all good stores from 7th March
Bring some lipstick.
Flake mincing around with sailors on an oil rig?
Excellent :)
Excellent :)
Flake minced his way long the dark corridor. It was dark, it was cold, there was water dripping from the pipes that were strung along the ceiling above him. "Why oh Why did I ever accept this dumb mission?" thought Flake to himself. He thought about his nice appartment back in NY, the gay bar just around the corner where all his friends would be having a good old chin wag at this time of night, and his cat, Fluffy. What would Fluffy be doing now? Flake shook his head to clear his thoughts; he had to concentrate because the critical part of this operation was just around the corner.
He approached the L-bend at the end of this particular stretch and flattened himself against the wall, then quickly jumped forward again as one of the hot water pipes burnt though his rubber swim suit.
"Damn!" he cursed, looking at the singed rubber across his butt, "That's gonna leave a mark."
Carefully he peered around the corner. There was a guard at the far end, about 50ft away from him, standing in front of the door that Flake needed to get through. Flake considered his options, and as he did so his Codec beeped in his ear. He put his fingers up to his earlobe, gave it a tweak and the signal came through.
"Hi sweetie, this is Otacon!"
"Lo ducky, what's up?"
"Weeelll, guess!"
"Um, I haven't got time right now darling, is it important?"
"Oooh, you spoilsport! OK, I was just calling to let you know that I've dropped off your laundry back at your place, and did a bit of dusting while I was there. You really should do a bit more housework, Flake!"
"Thanks hun, did you feed Fluffy?"
"Fluffy's fine. He misses you, so do I, what time will you be back?"
Flake glanced at his Swiss watch, he had to be in and out of here quickly before anyone was alerted. It was now 11pm CET, and he had to be back at the prearranged pickup point within the next 30 minutes. He couldn't afford to be late because the submarine would leave without him and he'd probably get his wrists slapped. The short trip from the Norwegian Fjord back to the US Airbase in Helsinki, then a 3 hour trans-Atlantic crossing in a stealth jet, he figured he'd be home by midnight EST.
"I'll say 1am your time just to be on the safe side, Otty, don't wait up OK?"
"Oh, OK, maybe I'll go for a couple of drinks then, be good! I know I won't!"
The Codec beeped again as Otacon signed off. Flake decided it was now or never and gathered himself for the upcoming confrontation. He got lucky. The guard was moving towards him, probably suspicious of the smell of burning rubber that he'd picked up the scent of a few seconds ago. As he got to within 10 feet of Flake's position, Flake jumped out from his hiding position.
"Surprise!" shouted Flake, as he slapped the guard hard across the cheek.
"Oooh, you b***h!" screamed the guard, prepping his handbag for retaliation.
But Flake was to quick, and having already opened his compact he blew fine powder into the guard's unsuspecting face. The guard was unconscious 0.3 seconds later. Flake checked his complextion in the compact's mirror, then quickly dragged the guard back around the corner, out of sight of anyone who may come through that door.
All was clear, so Flake cautiously crept up towards the far end of the corridor. He couldn't be certain, but he thought he could sense the high pitched hum of lasers. Just to make sure he popped a fag in his mouth, chuckling at the innuendo as he did so. Puffing the smoke towards the door revealed the thread-thin beams of red laser traversing the few feet between him and his destination, so he managed to spritely hop over these, then paused to listen.
All was silent, so he placed his hand on the doorhandle and turned it. The door opened inwards, and Flake couldn't see inside due to the dark. He risked being incautious for a split second as he darted inside the room and closed the door behind him. There he rested, trying to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Before they could do so, there was a click, and the room was awash with bright light. Flake threw his arm up before his eyes, but it was too late, he was already blinded. A voice, low and menacing, spoke to him.
"So, you made it..."
"Huh? Who are you?" Flake couldn't quite place the voice.
"I am your brother, Flake..."
"Limp? Limp Flake? What are you doing here??" Flake was troubled now, things weren't going according to plan.
"Ha Ha Ha! I'm waiting for you, of course! Did you think you could just sneak into this military installation, steal the plans for Metal Gear Tex, and sneak out again?"
Flake was confused. "Metal Gear Tex? What are you talking about?"
"Ah HA!" his brother seemed amused by Flake's lack of plot knowledge. "Allow me to fill you in, brother!"
There followed 20 minutes of cut-scene where Limp explained all about how Metal Gear Tex was now in the posession of the La Le Lu Li Lo, who were masquerading as a Village People tribute band until such a time as they could take over the world. How they were going to make Flake the fall guy. How they didn't manage to do this in the last two games because Hideo Kojima didn't write this one. How they were going to install Raiden as a gay icon for all the world to admire and worship.
But it was too late again. Flake had already got bored 5 minutes in, and had dozed off, despite someone on his Codec yelling "Flake? Flake! Flaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!" into his ear.
Petal Gear for Solid 3: Substances - In all good stores from 7th March
Bring some lipstick.
He approached the L-bend at the end of this particular stretch and flattened himself against the wall, then quickly jumped forward again as one of the hot water pipes burnt though his rubber swim suit.
"Damn!" he cursed, looking at the singed rubber across his butt, "That's gonna leave a mark."
Carefully he peered around the corner. There was a guard at the far end, about 50ft away from him, standing in front of the door that Flake needed to get through. Flake considered his options, and as he did so his Codec beeped in his ear. He put his fingers up to his earlobe, gave it a tweak and the signal came through.
"Hi sweetie, this is Otacon!"
"Lo ducky, what's up?"
"Weeelll, guess!"
"Um, I haven't got time right now darling, is it important?"
"Oooh, you spoilsport! OK, I was just calling to let you know that I've dropped off your laundry back at your place, and did a bit of dusting while I was there. You really should do a bit more housework, Flake!"
"Thanks hun, did you feed Fluffy?"
"Fluffy's fine. He misses you, so do I, what time will you be back?"
Flake glanced at his Swiss watch, he had to be in and out of here quickly before anyone was alerted. It was now 11pm CET, and he had to be back at the prearranged pickup point within the next 30 minutes. He couldn't afford to be late because the submarine would leave without him and he'd probably get his wrists slapped. The short trip from the Norwegian Fjord back to the US Airbase in Helsinki, then a 3 hour trans-Atlantic crossing in a stealth jet, he figured he'd be home by midnight EST.
"I'll say 1am your time just to be on the safe side, Otty, don't wait up OK?"
"Oh, OK, maybe I'll go for a couple of drinks then, be good! I know I won't!"
The Codec beeped again as Otacon signed off. Flake decided it was now or never and gathered himself for the upcoming confrontation. He got lucky. The guard was moving towards him, probably suspicious of the smell of burning rubber that he'd picked up the scent of a few seconds ago. As he got to within 10 feet of Flake's position, Flake jumped out from his hiding position.
"Surprise!" shouted Flake, as he slapped the guard hard across the cheek.
"Oooh, you b***h!" screamed the guard, prepping his handbag for retaliation.
But Flake was to quick, and having already opened his compact he blew fine powder into the guard's unsuspecting face. The guard was unconscious 0.3 seconds later. Flake checked his complextion in the compact's mirror, then quickly dragged the guard back around the corner, out of sight of anyone who may come through that door.
All was clear, so Flake cautiously crept up towards the far end of the corridor. He couldn't be certain, but he thought he could sense the high pitched hum of lasers. Just to make sure he popped a fag in his mouth, chuckling at the innuendo as he did so. Puffing the smoke towards the door revealed the thread-thin beams of red laser traversing the few feet between him and his destination, so he managed to spritely hop over these, then paused to listen.
All was silent, so he placed his hand on the doorhandle and turned it. The door opened inwards, and Flake couldn't see inside due to the dark. He risked being incautious for a split second as he darted inside the room and closed the door behind him. There he rested, trying to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Before they could do so, there was a click, and the room was awash with bright light. Flake threw his arm up before his eyes, but it was too late, he was already blinded. A voice, low and menacing, spoke to him.
"So, you made it..."
"Huh? Who are you?" Flake couldn't quite place the voice.
"I am your brother, Flake..."
"Limp? Limp Flake? What are you doing here??" Flake was troubled now, things weren't going according to plan.
"Ha Ha Ha! I'm waiting for you, of course! Did you think you could just sneak into this military installation, steal the plans for Metal Gear Tex, and sneak out again?"
Flake was confused. "Metal Gear Tex? What are you talking about?"
"Ah HA!" his brother seemed amused by Flake's lack of plot knowledge. "Allow me to fill you in, brother!"
There followed 20 minutes of cut-scene where Limp explained all about how Metal Gear Tex was now in the posession of the La Le Lu Li Lo, who were masquerading as a Village People tribute band until such a time as they could take over the world. How they were going to make Flake the fall guy. How they didn't manage to do this in the last two games because Hideo Kojima didn't write this one. How they were going to install Raiden as a gay icon for all the world to admire and worship.
But it was too late again. Flake had already got bored 5 minutes in, and had dozed off, despite someone on his Codec yelling "Flake? Flake! Flaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!" into his ear.
Petal Gear for Solid 3: Substances - In all good stores from 7th March
Bring some lipstick.