Viewing Thread:
"Why are movie fights so rubbish?"

I've been in a couple of fights, seen others and one thing is abundantly clear:

They are short, scrappy and involve grabbing of clothes, wild kicks and punches and flailing body shots.

So why then, in movies, do punch-ups last ages and they act like they're professional stunt fighty dudes?

Utter pony.

One decent movie punch-up is "They Live" by John Carpenter.
Lasts 7 minutes because "I wanted to make the most ridiculous, moron fight scene ever", and it is.

But it always happens.
Except in Fight Club, that is realistic.
Watch the narrator 1st smack Tyler Durden "Ow man, you hit me in the ear!", and they are throwing each other about, grabbing hair and using stuff lying around.

Movie fights are rubbish.

What are you all talking about?

I thought that Charlies Angels was incredibly realistic!

:D

The one at the end of Snatch..................Oh yeah! Since that's an 18 I s'pose they can put as much blood in 2 the film as they like. Good point.

Wot About The One At The End Of Snatch??

Plus before the fight he'd been stabbed in the back by the evil dude. What's wrong with most fight scenes in films is the lack of blood! The Return Of The Mummy - Eevee gets a sword straight through her, as in in the front and out the back, and not a drop of blood appears!!! Fake!!! We NEED more gore in films.

Ah, but you're talking about kung-fu movies, those are different.
They are beautifully choreographed and supposed to be balletic.

I'm talking about the bog standard, hollywood action moron type of fight.

As much as I enjoyed Gladiator, he took some pounding and still won.

Seemed a little suspect to me.

I'm sorry but if I want to see a "proper" brawl drunken or otherwise, I'd go to a club and ruffle some feathers.

I don't want to see a pi$$ed up fatty having having his lower back slapped while his t-shirt is pulled over his head and his beer gut is on show, while i'm watching the telly.

Screw realism. If films were like watching real life, they wouldn't make such good escapism.

If I'm watching a fight on tv, then I expect brilliantly choreographed fights between tiny supple chinese people, that have more in common with dance than they do with a "real" brawl.
And those fighting on my tv feel the need to float from roof top to rrof top and run up walls or fight on wooden piles, then so be it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's true, however magestic a movie fight may be, it still looks utterly rehearsed.

Shame really, I wanna see a punch up between two drunken men, with broken bottles, biting, poking and blood. Lots of it.

The fight in Bridget Jones is acceptable, only because it's between Hugh Grant and Colin Firth, or the fops, as I call them.

But most fights are hugging and rolling about on the floor.

I have never, ever seen two blokes circle each other and fly backwards over cars when smacked.
They look stunned and annoyed, then jump at the other person, delivering really really crap kicks.

And it usually ends up with them on the floor, before someone gets up and runs off.

Or, if movies are to be believed:

Punch!
LEAP backwards
Circle each other, shaking head and wiping blood from mouth
Punch!
LEAP sideways
Circle each other
Punch!
FALL through a coffee table, then get up and wipe blood
Circle each other

I mean really...

My sister and I once had a similar discussion, which lead to the following fact: Old fighting was rubbish.

In many of the older films we saw as kids, mostly Westerns, given my Nan's love of the genre, fight scenes involved little more than hugging each other, and rolling around in the dirt, kicking up an awful lot of dust.

Modern TV shows of the time, like The A Team involved punches and stuff.

So we 'discovered' that old fighting was rubbish, and punching is something new to our generation. :-)