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"SSC 30 - Dolphinia"

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Tue 16/08/05 at 20:10
Regular
"I like cheese"
Posts: 16,918
Sammy was a Dolphin. Despite being given a slightly feminine name, he was indeed, a he. He lived in the clear, sparkling sun-drenched seas of the Caribbean, and had a similar attitude toward life as his human counterparts, or so he believed. As far as Sammy could tell, the two-legged, fin-less creatures of the Caribbean spent most of their days relaxing on the light, golden rock of the beach, sunbathing until the Bright Orange Circle in the sky went to sleep, and throwing large, deceptive traps to catch and brutally kill thousands upon thousands of Dolphish. On occasion though, these devices of terror would even capture the sharp-toothed dolphins, or Deathphins, as Sammy’s survival teacher had branded them.

Generally, life in the water was one of pure thrills and pleasure. Sammy often pondered why the Two-legs didn’t venture further out into the ocean, and why they didn’t swim, leap or chase like he and his friends did so often. The only possible explanation Sammy could muster, was that the Two-legs were scared of the Deathphins. But the Deathphins were rare, even these days, and school had taught Sammy that it wasn’t these soulless, evil monsters that the Two-legs feared, but the water itself! Sammy and his friends had laughed uproariously when Mr Coral revealed this amazing fact, but their teacher’s stern look and still tail signalled that he wasn’t attempting to tell a joke.

The water was everything to Sammy. Not only was it where he lived and what he breathed, but it was his playground. The word “boring” does not exist in the Dolphic language, and Sammy and his close group of friends proved why everyday of their wet, wild and exciting lives.

Sammy’s tale motored through the water furiously and surged him onwards at an incredible rate, with Roxie and Christy racing just behind. He laughed joyously as he weaved in and out of large and threatening boulders, skimmed the dusty surface of the end of the world and sped past the colourful pieces of dancing coral. The Orange Circle in the sky smiled down from the beginning of the world, rapturously showing them that he was also enjoying the game they were playing. It’s unbridled happiness was there for all to recognise – to angle upwards was to be greeted by shimmering sparks of orange, blue and yellow that streaked across the serenely beautiful pinnacle of the sea, and to power downwards was to be met by the twisting, turning, bouncing silhouettes of the million types of wild, wonderful and wickedly wacky marine life that flourished here in Dolphinia.

Sammy took the opportunity to glance behind him at his opponents in the race…he was pulling away! Surely he was going to be the first to reach the cave!

Oh no! A huge school of Dolphish! Sammy slowed slightly but there was no way he would ever be able to get round them all, it appeared to be never-ending! The tiny, grey Dolphish heard him rocketing toward them and soon realised the danger they were in – the Bottlenose-shaped missile that hurtled their way would surely crush them! Hundreds of small cries echoed throughout the ocean as mothers and fathers desperately tried to nudge their children out of the way, and Sammy grimaced as he hopelessly attempted to stop, but surely it was too late! Suddenly an idea sprung to mind, and in similar fashion he instantly sprung upwards, fighting the powerful, endless force of the water to torpedo his way forwards into the chuckling features of the Orange Circle. To the top of the world he powered, and just as his fin and tail were beginning to tire he flew out of the water and into the clean, open air. He basked for a few moments in the warmth of his friend, the Orange Circle, whose rays in turn greeted him with abundant welcome, before plummeting back into the ocean with such ferocity that it surprised even himself.

He surged back downwards, still grinning from his latest adventure to the beginning of the world, but hoping to get himself back in the race! However, as he swam, he felt himself reaching uncharted territories. He slowed as he began to realise that he wasn’t quite sure of his whereabouts. The water had suddenly become a much darker, menacing shade of blue, and to his surprise he realised that he was surrounded by dozens of drifting, emotionless jellyfish. As his mother and father had regularly reminded him, the sea, whilst being the happiest place in the world, also possessed many unseen dangers of its own. Oh, how often they had reminded him to stay with his friends and not to get lost! Sammy slowly began to reverse, panicking more with every passing second.

A blur. Sammy twisted instantly to his right. Nothing.

WHOOSH! Sammy turned again, something was definitely there! He circled quickly, tensing his tail for extra force, and streamlining his whole body for velocity…if either were needed.

There! Something above h-!

Sammy didn’t even have time to think. The Deathphin crashed into his side and sent him tumbling toward the end of the world. Sammy tried to recover but was too slow, as the Deathphin followed up with another crushing blow, this time to the side of the head. Sammy hurtled into the surface of the sea, dust and rock enveloping him as his head spun from the impact of the collision.

Although Deathphin attacks were relatively rare in Dolphinia, they weren’t unheard of, and the eventual result was almost always the same. Deathphins picked their victims carefully, and timed their attacks perfectly. They weren’t stupid, far from it in fact, and would only pounce on prey that was alone, unguarded…and preferably young. Deathphins loved to feed on the innocent. Sammy knew that death was upon him, and for the first time in his life he was frightened and he was scared, oh so scared. He wished for his loving, kind mother and for his strong, yet caring father…they would protect him! But he had not listened to their advice, and now he knew that it was not only the end for him, but that the pain of his death would weigh on the fins of his parents for the rest of their lives.

Despite all the carnage – the stinging jellyfish, the snaring seaweed, and the choking sand that surrounded him, and the unimaginable fear that coursed through his body, he began to cry tears of sadness. In a last gasp hope for survival, he pleaded with his friend, the Orange Circle in the sky, for its help. But he could feel the looming presence of the Deathphin, and Sammy could no longer see any light.

The Deathphin’s brutally sharp teeth tore at Sammy’s tale, and Sammy cried out in pain, only wishing for it to end. He shut his eyes tight and awaited the final, searing burst of hurt before death…

But it never came. He kept his eyes closed, but he could hear the Deathphin roar in anger, and then again in anguish. Sammy curled his tail underneath him as best as he could and simply lay there, as the terrifying shrieks that emanated all around him told the story of a fight.

Wait, there was light! It was The Orange Circle! Sammy instantly opened his eyes and watched with utmost relief as the Deathphin swam away, blood pouring from injuries to his eye and dorsal fin. And Sammy’s heart leapt as high as when Sammy himself had flown from the ocean, when he saw his friends Roxie, Christy, Billy and Casey rush over to help him.

At the time, they were all in far too much shock to talk, let alone explain what had happened. But it was later revealed that whilst they were searching for Sammy, Roxie and Christy came across a sparkling, multi-coloured arrow, formed from the most beautifully bright light they had ever witnessed, pointing them to where Sammy was being attacked. Even the most genius of Dolphins back at Dolphinia, simply couldn’t figure out how the arrow had come about, but what they did know, is that it was this arrow, along with his brave and courageous friends, that had saved Sammy's life.

However, local myth claimed that another friend was acting for his cause. The Orange Circle at the beginning of the world had always smiled down upon Sammy...and perhaps it simply wished, to smile down on him some more.
Sat 10/09/05 at 15:06
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
That didn't do much for me, to be honest, but I can appriciate it was a good story, just not my bag.
Tue 30/08/05 at 19:32
Regular
"Going nowhere fast"
Posts: 6,574
I'd have to agree with Stryke (an almost unheard of occurrance I know :)) but it does have a childlike innocence to it. Cleanly written and enjoyable in it's simplicity.

EDIT: I thought thought Deathphins were sharks and was the misspelling of 'tale' deliberate?
Sat 27/08/05 at 09:45
Regular
Posts: 16,548
I really liked the innocence that seems to dominate this. Feels like when you go back to a book you loved as a child, and the nostalgia you get. Making up words like deathphin just add to the childish quality. Not that I'm saying the writing is childish, I just liked how it made me feel like a child reading it again.
Fri 26/08/05 at 20:08
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
Well written piece, almost fable-like given the animal based-ness (not a word, but I'm sure you know that) of it.
Fri 26/08/05 at 01:09
Regular
Posts: 9,848
There were some bits that I didn't quite get...
Deathpins were harpoons, the Orange Circle was the sun, but I didn't get what the multicoloured arrow was and how it saved the guy's life.
Explain me! :-)
Thu 25/08/05 at 23:47
Regular
"I like cheese"
Posts: 16,918
Thank you, Black Glove, for understanding and appreciating everything that I attempted to achieve in that story. Seriously...thanks. {:)
Fri 19/08/05 at 11:00
Regular
"Laughingstock"
Posts: 3,522
I liked so many things in this: the live-affirming enthusiasm of Sammy, the way the orange circle in the sky was like a god to the dolphins, the descriptions, the atmosphere, the deathphin attack - yeah, it captured so much.
Tue 16/08/05 at 20:10
Regular
"I like cheese"
Posts: 16,918
Sammy was a Dolphin. Despite being given a slightly feminine name, he was indeed, a he. He lived in the clear, sparkling sun-drenched seas of the Caribbean, and had a similar attitude toward life as his human counterparts, or so he believed. As far as Sammy could tell, the two-legged, fin-less creatures of the Caribbean spent most of their days relaxing on the light, golden rock of the beach, sunbathing until the Bright Orange Circle in the sky went to sleep, and throwing large, deceptive traps to catch and brutally kill thousands upon thousands of Dolphish. On occasion though, these devices of terror would even capture the sharp-toothed dolphins, or Deathphins, as Sammy’s survival teacher had branded them.

Generally, life in the water was one of pure thrills and pleasure. Sammy often pondered why the Two-legs didn’t venture further out into the ocean, and why they didn’t swim, leap or chase like he and his friends did so often. The only possible explanation Sammy could muster, was that the Two-legs were scared of the Deathphins. But the Deathphins were rare, even these days, and school had taught Sammy that it wasn’t these soulless, evil monsters that the Two-legs feared, but the water itself! Sammy and his friends had laughed uproariously when Mr Coral revealed this amazing fact, but their teacher’s stern look and still tail signalled that he wasn’t attempting to tell a joke.

The water was everything to Sammy. Not only was it where he lived and what he breathed, but it was his playground. The word “boring” does not exist in the Dolphic language, and Sammy and his close group of friends proved why everyday of their wet, wild and exciting lives.

Sammy’s tale motored through the water furiously and surged him onwards at an incredible rate, with Roxie and Christy racing just behind. He laughed joyously as he weaved in and out of large and threatening boulders, skimmed the dusty surface of the end of the world and sped past the colourful pieces of dancing coral. The Orange Circle in the sky smiled down from the beginning of the world, rapturously showing them that he was also enjoying the game they were playing. It’s unbridled happiness was there for all to recognise – to angle upwards was to be greeted by shimmering sparks of orange, blue and yellow that streaked across the serenely beautiful pinnacle of the sea, and to power downwards was to be met by the twisting, turning, bouncing silhouettes of the million types of wild, wonderful and wickedly wacky marine life that flourished here in Dolphinia.

Sammy took the opportunity to glance behind him at his opponents in the race…he was pulling away! Surely he was going to be the first to reach the cave!

Oh no! A huge school of Dolphish! Sammy slowed slightly but there was no way he would ever be able to get round them all, it appeared to be never-ending! The tiny, grey Dolphish heard him rocketing toward them and soon realised the danger they were in – the Bottlenose-shaped missile that hurtled their way would surely crush them! Hundreds of small cries echoed throughout the ocean as mothers and fathers desperately tried to nudge their children out of the way, and Sammy grimaced as he hopelessly attempted to stop, but surely it was too late! Suddenly an idea sprung to mind, and in similar fashion he instantly sprung upwards, fighting the powerful, endless force of the water to torpedo his way forwards into the chuckling features of the Orange Circle. To the top of the world he powered, and just as his fin and tail were beginning to tire he flew out of the water and into the clean, open air. He basked for a few moments in the warmth of his friend, the Orange Circle, whose rays in turn greeted him with abundant welcome, before plummeting back into the ocean with such ferocity that it surprised even himself.

He surged back downwards, still grinning from his latest adventure to the beginning of the world, but hoping to get himself back in the race! However, as he swam, he felt himself reaching uncharted territories. He slowed as he began to realise that he wasn’t quite sure of his whereabouts. The water had suddenly become a much darker, menacing shade of blue, and to his surprise he realised that he was surrounded by dozens of drifting, emotionless jellyfish. As his mother and father had regularly reminded him, the sea, whilst being the happiest place in the world, also possessed many unseen dangers of its own. Oh, how often they had reminded him to stay with his friends and not to get lost! Sammy slowly began to reverse, panicking more with every passing second.

A blur. Sammy twisted instantly to his right. Nothing.

WHOOSH! Sammy turned again, something was definitely there! He circled quickly, tensing his tail for extra force, and streamlining his whole body for velocity…if either were needed.

There! Something above h-!

Sammy didn’t even have time to think. The Deathphin crashed into his side and sent him tumbling toward the end of the world. Sammy tried to recover but was too slow, as the Deathphin followed up with another crushing blow, this time to the side of the head. Sammy hurtled into the surface of the sea, dust and rock enveloping him as his head spun from the impact of the collision.

Although Deathphin attacks were relatively rare in Dolphinia, they weren’t unheard of, and the eventual result was almost always the same. Deathphins picked their victims carefully, and timed their attacks perfectly. They weren’t stupid, far from it in fact, and would only pounce on prey that was alone, unguarded…and preferably young. Deathphins loved to feed on the innocent. Sammy knew that death was upon him, and for the first time in his life he was frightened and he was scared, oh so scared. He wished for his loving, kind mother and for his strong, yet caring father…they would protect him! But he had not listened to their advice, and now he knew that it was not only the end for him, but that the pain of his death would weigh on the fins of his parents for the rest of their lives.

Despite all the carnage – the stinging jellyfish, the snaring seaweed, and the choking sand that surrounded him, and the unimaginable fear that coursed through his body, he began to cry tears of sadness. In a last gasp hope for survival, he pleaded with his friend, the Orange Circle in the sky, for its help. But he could feel the looming presence of the Deathphin, and Sammy could no longer see any light.

The Deathphin’s brutally sharp teeth tore at Sammy’s tale, and Sammy cried out in pain, only wishing for it to end. He shut his eyes tight and awaited the final, searing burst of hurt before death…

But it never came. He kept his eyes closed, but he could hear the Deathphin roar in anger, and then again in anguish. Sammy curled his tail underneath him as best as he could and simply lay there, as the terrifying shrieks that emanated all around him told the story of a fight.

Wait, there was light! It was The Orange Circle! Sammy instantly opened his eyes and watched with utmost relief as the Deathphin swam away, blood pouring from injuries to his eye and dorsal fin. And Sammy’s heart leapt as high as when Sammy himself had flown from the ocean, when he saw his friends Roxie, Christy, Billy and Casey rush over to help him.

At the time, they were all in far too much shock to talk, let alone explain what had happened. But it was later revealed that whilst they were searching for Sammy, Roxie and Christy came across a sparkling, multi-coloured arrow, formed from the most beautifully bright light they had ever witnessed, pointing them to where Sammy was being attacked. Even the most genius of Dolphins back at Dolphinia, simply couldn’t figure out how the arrow had come about, but what they did know, is that it was this arrow, along with his brave and courageous friends, that had saved Sammy's life.

However, local myth claimed that another friend was acting for his cause. The Orange Circle at the beginning of the world had always smiled down upon Sammy...and perhaps it simply wished, to smile down on him some more.

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